


In the Shadows Comes the Light

by mistyhollowdrummer



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: A cute dog named Rover, Aged up characters, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Anxiety Attacks, But also a cute dog named Rover, F/M, Fluff, Mentions of Major Character Death, Smut, Sort Of, Swearing, Very small mentions of Katt, Very very small, You'll see what I mean, slight angst, some violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-18
Updated: 2017-11-18
Packaged: 2019-02-03 19:53:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 51,139
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12755064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mistyhollowdrummer/pseuds/mistyhollowdrummer
Summary: Since she was born, Katie had always retained the memories of her past life. The memories of flying, colors morphing in space, technology beyond their comprehensions, and her teammates. However, despite having memories ingrained into her like scars into skin, none of her friends remembered. Not even her family, who worried for her mental health whenever she spoke of such fantasies.It took a long time, but she finally found a familiar face with scars that matched her own.





	In the Shadows Comes the Light

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, and welcome to this shit storm that is 51,171 words of a one shot! Originally this was meant to be waaaay shorter, but then my friend Hail was like, "You could probably finish the goal for nanowrimo."  
> So all blame for the length of this fic goes directly to Hail. Also a huge thanks to her, since she proof read this. Please thank the woman for staying up until 3 in the morning to proof read this! X'D  
> So here is my contribution to nanowrimo, as well as a reincarnation AU, because I have no seen a reincarnation AU for Pidge and Lance yet. This I must alleviate. :3  
> If you read through all of this... Seriously. Thank you. Like for reals. This is a long wall of words and I appreciate anyone and everyone who reads all of this.

Katie had always been different. Her parents saw it the moment she began speaking. When her first word was “lion,” and when she drew robots and stars instead of flowers and stick figures.

When her brassy eyes would drift away from them and to figures they couldn’t see. Like her imaginary friends had materialized into physical beings. 

Colleen and Samuel Holt dismissed it all at first as childish behavior. She was born by two incredibly smart people, so her brain was big and she was able to retain incredible things. Her mind would span across fantasies they couldn’t comprehend, so they assumed she was naturally an intellectual thinker. Sam assured his wife that she could be a very talented artist some day with the way she drew her lions and robots. He also said she could be an incredible writer with some of the stories she came up with. 

When Katie could create full sentences, though slurred and facing difficulties with w’s and r’s, she told fascinating stories. She told them of how she believed she was once a pilot to a green lion that formed with four other lions of brilliant colors to create an incredible weapon. It fought with five pilots behind the controls, their teamwork saving the universe on so many occasions. 

She spoke of adventures in outer space; of mice that communicated in their own ways and of a cow named Kaltenicker. She even spoke of a man she once loved.

They began to fear these stories when they became more vivid. 

At five, they sent her to a children’s psychologist. They wanted her evaluated after her most recent story. 

“And guess what.”

“What...?” Colleen had asked, tucking her hair behind her ear as she bent down to be at eye level with her daughter. 

“And-And then my lion crashed. And then I died...”

Colleen had looked back at Sam when she said that, worry evident in her brown eyes. 

“You... Died, sweetie?” Her father had asked. 

“Yeah, but then I️ woke up here with momma!”

Katie hadn’t been the least bit perturbed by the stories she told. She was as happy as any five year old could be, and her therapist told them that. She told them she had an over active imagination, and at such a young age, it was normal. While her stories were, for lack of a better word, _detailed_ , she assured her parents that it was possibly too much television, and that she was reading books that were probably not for her reading age.

She encouraged them to allow her stories. Maybe discuss with her that in public her stories weren’t appropriate, but never to hide her creativity. Let it spark so she could grow her imagination. Edge it along with stimulating and positive visuals to help it in the right direction, and keep exposure to negativity to as little as possible. This way she wasn’t stunted in her growth and wouldn’t feel outed by her family. 

So the Holt’s did just that. They had told her not to talk about her stories in school and save them for home. They reduced things that had to do with space, because that seemed to be a trigger for her dreams. They got her more toys that were for her age; more dolls and tea sets, a stuffed mermaid, and even lego sets so she could build, but it always steered back to the dreams she had. 

At eight, it became too much. 

Not only had her dreams expanded, but they became horrifically detailed. She talked about how a man named “Shiro,” (and how she knew of such a name was beyond their comprehension) lost his arm to things called Druids. He had a scar across his nose and PTSD that was easily a block to his memories. 

Eight year olds shouldn’t have known what any of that meant, but she did. 

She talked about a man named Keith, half Galra, half human. A strong fighter who once held a king of a planet with a sword to his neck after betraying his own people. 

She talked of a man named Hunk. A rather large man who loved to cook. She talked of him being farted out of a giant worm. 

She spoke of a guy named Lance, a name they had heard of before. She said he was a sharp shooter who never missed. She said she used to have a crush on him, but never said anything about it. They only ever dated for the last few months of his life, and she felt bad for never telling him how she really felt. 

She shouldn’t have talked like this. 

Katie then spoke of Matt, her brother, who had a story that was too horrifying to bear. 

He was kidnapped with Shiro on a mission to a moon for Pluto. He was tortured and forced to battle for his life. He killed others to survive in an arena after losing Shiro. He was rescued by rebel fighters who trained him to be a warrior, where he defeated Galra bases. It always went back to the word Galra, and another thing. 

Voltron. 

When she was ten, she began speaking of these dreams as memories. 

“I’m telling you, Mom,” She began, speaking adamantly. “These aren’t dreams! This was something I lived! It’s something Matt lived! _You_ lived it!”

She had been ignored. Her parents began brushing off the stories. 

So she began telling them elsewhere. 

At eleven, it was at school she told them. She wrote them in a report. When she was supposed to write a report on a moment in history, she chose her own, and failed the project. 

When it got to her parents, that had been the final straw. 

“I’ve had enough of these stories, Kaitlyn!” Her father had yelled, tossing her five page report into the trash. “We’ve told you time and again to stop with these stories!”

“But dad-!”

“No more excuses!” Her mother hollered, forcing her into a chair at the kitchen table. 

“It’s not an excuse, mom! This is real!” She tried to reason with them, but they just  _weren’t listening._  

“Katie, just stop!” She pleased with her. 

“I can’t! I lived that life! I was a pilot! I saved the universe from Zarkon-!”

“Enough!” Her father’s voice boomed so loudly, shaking the floor boards beneath her feet. “I’ve had it up to here with these stories! If I hear another one of them again-!”

What...? He wasn’t even sure anymore. 

“Please, mom...” She looked back at her mother pleadingly, hoping for some form of understanding. There was none. “D-Dad...”

None from him either. 

Her brother’s head looked down the railing of the stairs, having heard the yelling from upstairs and listening in. He was fifteen, about to be sixteen, but he never had these dreams. 

“M-Matt...” Katie rushed from the chair, running up the stairs to grab at his shoulders, looking into his big eyes with fear. With a pleading, open, broken heart. “T-Tell them, Matt. You were there. You saw it all happen, didn’t you?”

Her brother looked at her, equally as lost, but for a whole different reason. He couldn’t agree to something he didn’t remember, and even if he did, he would suffer their parent’s wrath. 

He couldn’t say a thing. 

“P-Please...”

When he refused to speak, wide eyed in silent apology, Katie rushed to her room and slammed the door shut. She even pushed her dollhouse against it, though it would do no good. 

There was no escaping this reality. 

* * *

“Katie...?” Matt knocked lightly on the door. He didn’t expect a response, especially after he’d left her to the wolves earlier. So he pushed, feeling resistance on the other side of the door. It wasn’t much, so the dollhouse went sliding across her carpeted floor with minimal effort. 

He looked inside, finding her laying on her bed, curled up in blankets and hidden from the world. She was awake; he could tell by the small wiggle underneath the blanket. She just refused to leave her sanctuary. 

Matt shut the door behind him quietly and locked it. He came over to her bed, sitting down lightly on the edge and resting a hand over the lump of blankets. 

The wiggling stopped. 

“Katie... Can I talk to you?”

“Oh sure. Now you wanna talk...” His little sister bit out from under the blankets. 

“I’m so sorry, Katie. I really am. You know... How they are though.”

Matt lightly pulled the covers back, revealing her small form over her sketch book. Her cheeks and nose were red, splotchy, and tear stained; some of those tears had even stained the sketch book below her fingers, smearing blue and green colors together that bled from black lines. 

He looked over her artwork fondly, smiling at the recreation of who she called Green, flying next to Blue, as he remembered, Lance’s lion. 

She really liked the Blue Paladin as she called him. 

“So are you flying Green in this?” Matt asked, pointing down to the drawing of the Green lion. 

Katie smiled softly, sitting up just a bit to get a better look at her picture. 

“Yeah...” She whimpered. 

“And it’s Lance in this one, right?” She asked, pointing to the blue lion. 

“Yeah, but just for a while...” She told him. 

“Why is that...?”

“The real Shiro went missing, so Keith had to fly the black lion. Lance piloted the red lion while Allura took over Blue.”

While Matt didn’t believe her stories were anything more than overactive imagination, he always listened. He allowed her to tell her stories without judgement, because she had enough of that from their parents. She was safe and free to tell her stories to him, where she can relive her memories through her pictures and her words. 

She knew he didn’t believe her, but at least he didn’t judge her for it. 

* * *

Katie didn’t mention it again. 

Life went on. She grew older. Her hair got longer. She went to high school, her parents proud of her high grades and excellence and academic achievements. She learned how to drive, started dating, broke up, went to prom to be a wall flower, and did everything a normal teenager in this day and age would do. 

When she was a paladin, Katie had dreams of living this life. This normal, perfect life with concerns of pimples and grades instead of fighting for her life in space. She wanted this life of driving and shopping and having her parents and her brother. For Christmas mornings opening gifts, to hear Matt got accepted into a huge college, to have parties and to be a human again. 

Now it was dread. 

It was all fake. 

The memories never went away. She just stopped believing in them one day. She told herself that, if she acted like they didn’t exist, they’d eventually disappear like any other memory, but they didn’t. They were eventually as clear as the days they happened. 

Fighting. Flying. Saving planets. Making friends. Finding Matt. 

Falling in love. 

Her biggest regret that she wished she could forget. Never telling Lance how she felt before he died. Dying knowing she had never said it to him. 

While she wanted to believe with all of her heart that the visions she saw, that the memories in her head were all fake, she knew they weren’t. They were a life she once lived, and a life that followed her into this reality.

At times, Katie had actually considered shock therapy. She heard it could permanently erase memories. She didn’t care what damage it did to her nerves. She didn’t care if it made her blind. She didn’t care what else went with it so long as her former life disappeared.

If she was going to live this normal life she had previously dreamed of, she needed to live it happily. She needed to walk around not a shell, where her smile reached her eyes and she could feel like she wasn’t lying to herself or the people around herself. Where someone could tell a joke and she could laugh, thinking that it was actually funny.

She just needed to live, but she didn’t know how to do that anymore. No one had taught her, and no one was there to teach her.

* * *

Katie met Keith when she was nineteen. 

Keith was twenty years old, working part time at a coffee shop near her college he also attended. When she saw him handing out drinks, she spilled her own after bumping into someone, their shirt sleeve soaked and clinging to pale skin.

It took her breath away to see who was standing before her. Someone so different, but so strikingly the same that it made her eyes water.

Shiro looked good without the universes damage done to him. Without the white tuff of hair, the obvious trauma in his eyes, the lack of scar across his nose, and both arms. 

He looked healthy. He looked human.

“I-I am so sorry!” She had apologized, grabbing napkins from the napkin holder on her table and holding them against his sleeve. 

“It’s alright,” The older man assured her with a smile, a chuckle lacing his tone. “Accidents happen.”

“Are you alright, Shiro?” Keith had come over to ask, looking at her like she was crazy for the most part, and she felt like she probably was. 

Neither of them seemed out of sorts. They didn’t seem frazzled like she felt and were relaxed like nothing was out of place. Well, minus her spilled hot chocolate. Just hearing Keith refer to the man as Shiro, for him to exchange his name in such a way that was so human and familiar had her heart aching.

It was a startling realization she took from this as Shiro patted away the access moisture with an old rag Keith had handed him, telling him his coffee was on the house for today. Shiro had assured him that it wasn’t a problem and that he could still pay for it. Katie had come to realize that things like this weren’t the least of his concerns, because he lived a normal life with small, everyday problems that weren’t fighting to save a universe and risk dying.

They didn’t remember.

After the unfortunate hot chocolate incident, numerous apologies, and constant assurances, the two of them eventually found a way to make small talk. Shiro was still twenty five, to her surprise, so her age gap wasn’t as big as it had been before. She could hold a more adult conversation with him after experiencing freshman year of college, and how he talked about “the good old days” as he called it. He was then reprimanded by Keith, who reminded him that he wasn’t old, and that he was still in his final year of college.

Shiro and Katie found much to talk about that day. She didn’t have class for another few hours and Shiro had just finished his, so they sat at the café and talked about something they both shared in common; something that hadn’t changed since the first time she met him.

Their love of space.

It was actually a breath of fresh air to be able to talk about it. She held it in for so long, hiding her love for it to be normal that speaking of it all on its own was invigorating. A bit of a thrill even. She was breaking personal boundaries and rules set up for herself, and at any moment she expected to be reprimanded, but it didn’t come.

She would remind herself to reel in, to stay calm, because she wasn’t supposed to do this. She was supposed to be normal, but then Shiro mentioned the recent expansion to the base settled on Ganymede, and she couldn’t resist.

Keith had stopped by a couple of times between their conversations to make sure they were fine, asking if they wanted refills or any desserts while they sat. He even brought over two small cinnamon buns for the two of them, on him.

Katie had asked cautiously how he and Keith met, seeing as how they were friends. She wanted to know how they found each other, and if there wasn’t anything she could use to give her an idea that maybe he remembered something, but nothing really stuck out to her.

Shiro met Keith many years ago. They were actually neighbors at one point, and Shiro had sheltered Keith from his family on multiple occasions. It wasn’t explained why, and she didn’t pry. That wasn’t any of her business, but there was relief to know that they were still as tight as ever. He talked about how, when Keith started college on his own, he moved in with Shiro, and had been staying with him ever since.

It sounded to her like Keith still didn’t have a good upbringing, and that just wasn’t fair. Even if he didn’t remember his past life, it wasn’t fair for him to have to go through more hardships, but he seemed quite content with Shiro now. He was working and in school, supposedly doing well, and Shiro was just about the same. They even had a dog named Sven.

She had really hoped that it was just a coincidence for that one. While she wanted nothing more than for them to remember their previous life, to remember her, Sven was a bit of a roadblock they all could forget.

* * *

Katie eventually met Hunk through Keith. 

She was twenty one, just starting sophomore year. She had brought Matt to the café she always visited when he came to visit. Matt had long since finished his bachelor’s degree, currently working on his masters, but he had sworn on his first unborn child’s life that he would visit her before his classes started, and she made sure of it.

It was so warm out, but not too hot. A perfect day for short sleeved shirts and shorts. Katie was dressed in a comfortable attire while Matt wore his usual white shirt and jeans. When they got there, he was instantly bombarded by the incredible scents that she had gotten used to. Keith told her that her table was already waiting for them, greeting her brother with an acknowledging smile.

Still no signs of remembrance, but she was getting used to this. Having Shiro and Keith around actually settled some of her residing anxiety. While it wasn’t cured, she could breathe easier knowing they were alive and having a good life here on Earth and not fighting a war.

Keith brought them their newest dish and said it was curtesy of their new cook. One taste had them practically drooling, Matt snickering as he held a napkin to his lips to keep himself from salivating onto the table.

“Holy crap,” He had uttered, watching Katie moan as she leaned her head back against her chair.

“Our new cook is awesome.” Keith had informed them, his hands on his hips in a show of amusement. It was funny to him to see how alike they were, not just in looks, but their mannerisms as well.

“My compliments to the chef,” Matt’s expressive eyes lit up at another bite of the cake.

“I can get him if you want. He loves the compliments.” Keith offered, and they agreed.

Katie had been too wrapped up in eating her slice of the cake to notice the chef walk out at first. She was midway through a bite when the man came up, his round belly jutting in front of him in his proud stance while he beamed at the two of them.

“I hear someone wanted to compliment my cooking.”

And just like that, Katie’s elbow jutted back at the sound of his voice, knocking her water over into her own lap. The freezing cold water at any other point in time on such a warm day would have been nice, but not right there and definitely not right now.

Hunk hadn’t changed at all. He still even had a headband on, tying his hair back from his eyes while his smile brightened up the whole room as it had always done before. His eyes were a deep shade of brown, big and gentle, honest, and simply nothing about him had changed.

“You’re the clumsiest person I know, Katie.” Keith remarked with a frown, wiping down the contents dripping off of the table as she got out of her chair.

“I-I’m sorry…”

“Accidents happen. It’s not a big deal.” Hunk had blown off the situation entirely, even offering for a fresh cup of water, but she denied, saying she wanted to go home and get dressed.

As generous as he was, Hunk got their deserts into small boxes for them to carry, saying that he hoped to see Katie again, seeing as how she was now a regular at the shop. She was so mesmerized by all that was happening that she simply nodded, silently telling herself that she needed to give Hunk a proper apology (and greeting) when she came back again. Some other time without her brother, who could tell something was wrong.

* * *

“So are you going to tell me what happened in there?” Matt had asked as they walked down the street. Katie had opted for holding her backpack against her lap so people didn’t look at her and think she had peed herself.

“Nothing happened…”

“Katie…” Matt’s voice belittled her instant distancing, recognizing this sort of behavior. He’d seen it one too many times before. “That wasn’t nothing. I haven’t seen you so shaken up like that in a really long time. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing is wrong…” Again she blew it off, but he could tell by the look in her eyes.

The lights were on, but nobody was home, because she was so far gone into her head that she wasn’t acutely aware of her surroundings anymore. She’d very rarely done this; but he recognized it most from when she still had her delusions of her previous life. When she began to phase herself out of reality to be in her head. She perfected her technique to a point, and it was honestly frightening to see her doing it again.

“You know…” He began as they came to a stoplight, waiting for the walk sign to flare. “I remember a certain yellow paladin… Went by the name of Hunk.”

Katie’s eyes widened a fraction, and he could see it in her expression that he’d struck a chord. So it had something to do with that chef after all, but it wasn’t just him. No, she went to that place for other reasons, and by the name of the waiter there, he sounded like another.

“I remember a red paladin named Keith too.” The walk sign flashed white, allowing people to cross, but they stayed still. His little sister was frozen into place where she now stood. He could even see her hands trembling from where she held the box in her hand by her legs, squeezing the styrofoam hard enough to leave indents. “Keith is a pretty common name, but uh… Hunk, not so much.”

“… You’re right. It’s not.” She agreed quietly, eyes drawing to the end of the crosswalk and wondering when her feet were going to start moving again.

“Did seeing those guys make you think of your team?”

“Drop it, Matt.” She suddenly snapped, walking forward.

She had distanced herself before, but she’d never shut him out like that so harshly. She never bit his head off like that unless he’d done something to seriously annoy her, but she didn’t seem annoyed. Just… _Anxious._

“What’s wrong?” Matt asked as he followed close behind her.

“I told you that nothing is wrong.” Her voice dropped into a mutter, a moue of anger on her expression.

She was not going to be victimized again. She was not going to be some crying child anymore. She was not going to be outed again, by her brother no less. It wasn’t going to happen again. It just wasn’t.

“Clearly something is wrong.” He argued, taking wide strides to keep up with her now fast paced walk.

“Matt-” Katie suddenly turned around to stand up to him, her face close to his so he could see her eyes shine with unshed tears. She looked like she had prepared a yell, but she didn’t. Instead she shuddered as she sighed, reeling herself in. “Just… Drop it, okay?”

At one point when they were younger, Matt would have thought that this was teenage hormones. That she was suffering from delusions of grandeur and hiding from her parents, but now she had nothing to fear. It was just them, and while he still didn’t believe her stories, he wasn’t going to keep her at arm’s length for her beliefs.

She didn’t want to talk though, and when she didn’t want to talk, that meant that she didn’t want to talk. Katie was a lot like him in this aspect; when he was upset, he’d rather shut himself away to calm down before even attempting a broken response to anyone, and that’s what she needed. Whatever was going on needed to be solved by some heavy crying in her apartment where she could take all of her frustrations out by herself, and then when she was ready, and only when she was ready would she come to him.

Until then, nothing, and he was going to respect that she didn’t want to bring whatever this was up.

* * *

Weeks had gone by. Months. School was tough, classes were harsh, homework even harsher, but she had a little place she called home that wasn’t her apartment. A little peace and solace in the little coffee shop not far from her college where Keith and Hunk worked, and where Shiro often frequented.

Knowing Hunk was alive and doing well made her heart swell with joy. He wasn’t suffering; on the contrary, he was doing perfectly fine. His great cooking skills had gotten more customers in the shop, so it was busier than normal, and yet Katie always came by at seven thirty at night, a half an hour before closing, just to hang back with everyone. Even Shiro, despite his horrible work schedule mixed with his classes, still found time to meet them all there. Keith would break out the stale coffee while Hunk got them leftover deserts, whatever happened to be there and uneaten was then taken by them instead.

Keith and Hunk really should have been cleaning, but they sat back in a booth with Katie and Shiro and chatted the last half an hour away. It became a tradition of sorts, not to be broken unless someone was sick or had a really big test coming up that they needed to study for. They sat, ate, talked about their week’s problems, ranted, and gad a good laugh, and for a while, Katie felt normal again.

She never thought she’d be normal. This idea that she couldn’t live the life she wanted with these memories was such a constant that she didn’t think something as simple as having day old coffee with her old teammates could alleviate such tension, and it felt so good.

The weight was off her shoulders for the first time since she could remember. It was nice to sit with them, to joke and laugh, for one of them to throw their arm around her shoulders, depending on who was sitting next to her that night.

While she never brought up her memories, leaving that as a topic never to be discussed so she wouldn’t lose her friends, it always hung over head. Sometimes she thought to herself:

_“What would happen if I told them? What would happen if I spoke all of these memories? Would they believe me? Would they call me crazy? Would they leave? Would I lose my only chance at happiness?”_

She never spoke her mind, because she feared the outcome. She loved them too much to take the chance.

So even when she wasn’t completely okay with it, she was fine with just this. This was enough for her, even when their small group of friends wasn’t complete. Even when Allura and Coran weren’t there to join in on the laughter. Even when they couldn’t share stories about their cow.

Even when the arms occasionally slung around her shoulders weren’t Lance’s.

She missed him so much, and often at night when she laid in bed, she wondered where he could be. If he existed in this reality with his family, happily living his life without any knowledge of what he’d been through in his past life. Of the sacrifices he made to save his friends and loved ones.

She seemed to be the only one who remembered everything, and even as she wondered why, she hoped they would never remember. Their lives weren’t for the faint of heart, and they didn’t need that. They needed to live normal lives without war, so this was okay. In her head, she could relive those memories, but outside, she could rest easy knowing that at least three of her best friends were alive, safe, and living the lives they had always wanted.

It hurt being the only one to know, and it killed her to question where Lance was, if he was even alive to live a good life, but for once she could say that she was content. She could live like this and act with a little more normal. Her smile actually meant something every now and again, and in the mornings she woke up with at least one thing to look forward to that didn’t kill her spirits.

Well, that was until she met Lance.

* * *

Katie was twenty-two now. Her hair was down her back, her rounded out features had become sharper, older, less of a child and more of an adult with the life she lived, and even as she had a job and school, she still managed to get herself to the coffee shop at night, even when she had to drag her feet with her back pack hanging off of one arm, tugging through autumn leaves.

She wouldn’t miss a day, even when she was dog tired, because this was what she looked forward to. At the end of the day, this was her home, where her family sat, equally tired, sipping on coffee for just a few more hours of energy to make it home. She wouldn’t miss this for the world, even when Shiro had told her multiple times to take a day off and turn in early.

Tonight seemed to be no different. When she walked in, Hunk and Keith were sitting at their usual booth, leaning against each and looking like they were ready to pass out. She was pretty sure Keith had.

Shiro was sitting across from them, his head hanging low with a cup of stale coffee below him. The tips of his black hair were barely in the light brown substance, to which she wasn’t sure if he was aware of yet.

“Wait, let me join,” She told them, dropping her bag down by the table and plopping down beside Shiro.

“Welcome to the club. Dues is four dollars a night to afford bills.” Keith muttered sleepily, barely blinking at her to see her exhausted expression.

“Can someone spot me for the night?” Katie asked, leaning her head down on the table to smell cheap cleaner. “I’m broke.”

“Same.” Hunk uttered.

“Me too,” Shiro said.

“Don’t look at me.” Keith spoke up.

“You’re the one who gets tips. I don’t want to hear anything from you.” Shiro reprimanded with a pointed glance at him. The tips of his hair drenched in coffee leaned into his forehead, but he was so tired that he couldn’t seem to care.

“Yeah, because a fifty cent tip from college students is a lot of money. I’m rolling in dough.” He remarked, and to make his point clear, pulled a wad of change from his pocket.

“It’s better than me.” Hunk remarked, stifling a yawn into his palm.

Katie was so tired that her eye lids were getting heavy. Each time they closed, they closed for just a bit longer. She listened to their voices as they argued between one another, taking in the tones that seemed to sooth her troubles. It would have put her to sleep had someone else not spoken up.

“So is this a regular thing for you guys?”

If she wasn’t awake before, she was now.

Katie’s brown eyes shot open, staring at the wall next to Shiro as the man regarded whoever was beside them with a tired smile. There was an equally tired laugh shared amongst the small group as she lifted her head, her breathing labored as her eyes slowly looked to the floor where she saw sneaker clad feet standing by the table.

Long, thin legs and arms, a sturdy chest, dark skin with brown hair and blue eyes that shined brightly, lighting up the room with an equally bright smile.

She was pretty sure her heart just stopped.

_Lance._

“Yeah, we usually hang back for the last half an hour. No one comes in anyway.” Hunk explained, leaning his head back into the seat with a gruff sound escaping him. “It means we’re late, but we’re too damn tired to care.”

“I can respect that.” Lance agreed, his head nodding lightly while his hands sat on his hips. An old rag hung loosely from his fingers.

“Shiro, Katie, this is Lance. We needed help and he needed a job, so here he is.” Keith said, motioning to the taller teen with a weak wave of his hand. “Lance, this is Shiro and Katie.”

“Nice to meet you,” Shiro offered up a hand, letting Lance shake it with a firm grip.

“Nice to meet you too. Hunk and Keith told me about you guys.” Lance said, and Katie’s body practically melted. He still sounded the same, but his voice was deeper with his older age. It made her knees weak so quickly, and she reprimanded herself for falling to just the sound of his voice so easily.

She didn’t know him in this world. She couldn’t be like this.

“Oh, so you know all of our darkest secrets.” Shiro said.

“Eh, just something about you guys being from another planet or something like that.” Lance replied with a joke.

Katie stole Shiro’s coffee right from his hands and began sipping on it. She didn’t care that it wasn’t black, or that his hair had been in it not even five minutes before. She needed something to do.

“How could you tell them our secrets, Keith?” Shiro remarked, making the younger adult chuckle under an exhausted breath.

That’s when Lance’s eyes finally turned to her, looking down at the brunette with his smile unwavering.

He didn’t remember either. She didn’t need to know Lance in this world to know that he didn’t. He’d always been one who showed his internal thoughts so easily, at least to her. She knew him too well, so she knew that he didn’t remember her.

His eyes would have betrayed him, and she knew that.

“… H-Hi,” She uttered, shivering at the intensity of his stare. Katie could feel the goosebumps rise on her skin, but it was cold enough in the room that she could pass it off from that.

“Hey there,” He greeted. “Nice to meet you, Katie, right?”

Out of all of them saying her real name, it sounded the most wrong coming from Lance.

_No, no. Pidge. I’m Pidge. Please, Lance, my name is Pidge…_

Katie wished that someone would take his attention away from her. She couldn’t handle this. She had always imagined what would happen if she saw Lance again. She tried thinking up of things she could say to him, scenarios to be played out, ways to talk to him without seeming lost in thought, and she was completely failing at this moment.

“Uhm, y-yeah…” She held up her hand for him, letting him shake it with his firm grip that made her knees shake. His skin was so warm and soft, just as she remembered. “Nice to meet you, Lance…”

“Hey Lance,” Hunk said, barely able to lift his hand. “Grab a cup of coffee and join us.”

“You sure…?” Lance asked. Katie felt like she could take a breath of fresh air once his eyes were off of her, but she missed the touch of his skin against hers. She wished he could hold his hand again, even to simply touch his fingers, but she couldn’t.

She didn’t know him in this reality.

“Yeah. Come soak up the exhaustion with us.” Keith told him, his eyes closed. Lance shrugged his shoulders before wandering off to the back, going to grab himself a cup of coffee.

The minute he was gone, Hunk leaned forward in his seat, his arms resting on the table with a sly grin plastered on his face.

“What was that?” He asked, and it took her a moment for her to realize that he was talking to her.

“What was what?” She asked, bringing Shiro’s coffee to her lips.

“You know,” Hunk lightly kicked her under the table. “That look you gave Lance.”

“What look?”

“Don’t play coy, Katie. We all saw that.” Keith said, too tired to be as cocky about this as he wanted to be.

“Saw what?” She asked again with a frown. “I don’t-”

“You think he’s cute,” Hunk mused, poking at her with his fingers in a teasing manner.

“What? N-No I-”

“You wanna date him.”

“Hunk, I don’t-”

“You wanna kiss him.”

“Hunk-!”

“You wanna get married to him.” Keith then added.

“You guys!” She whined.

If only they knew. If only they knew what she really had thought, but they didn’t, and she couldn’t possibly tell them.

“Katie and Lance sittin’ in a tree,” Hunk began.

“K.I.S.S.I.N.G.” Keith intoned, and the two laughed together while her face flared with a blush.

“You guys are so stupid.” It was probably the most childish response in the world, but it was the only one she could come up with.

“Alright, that’s enough.” Shiro told them. “Leave her alone. It’s not every day she has a crush on someone.”

“Shiro!” She gaped in horror at the man as the other two laughed, feeling like suddenly this went from a simple evening hanging out for coffee and dessert to a teasing session towards her.

“I’m sorry, Katie, but it was kind of obvious.”

Of course it was obvious, because they didn’t know. They didn’t know anything.

“So what’d I miss?” Lance asked as he came back to the table, a cup of warmed up coffee in one hand and a small plate of cookies for everyone in the other. Shiro, Keith and Hunk exchanged all-knowing glances, snickering and chuckling under their breaths at the jokes they shared. Katie was the only one who wasn’t, and this left Lance with confusion written all over his face. “Uhh-” He began, but stopped short when Katie grabbed her backpack.

“I’ve gotta go.” She suddenly announced, leaving no time for replies or even giving an explanation as to why she was leaving. She just got up and left, leaving the four men alone to question the sudden action.

Leaving Lance to wonder if it was something he had done.

* * *

_Hey, Lance…”_

_The brunette looked up from his tablet, eyes peering towards the smaller teen standing by his bathroom door. His shirt looked like a dress on her._

_“Yeah…?”_

_“I have a question.” Pidge sauntered towards him, a swing to her hips as she came to his bedside and sat down. Lance set his tablet aside with a smile, his hands falling to rest on her bare thighs that were so soft after her shower._

_“Yes, yes, no, and next Tuesday.”_

_“Ha ha, very funny.” She rolled her eyes, unaware of how her personal appearance and the way his shirt slid down her shoulder effected Lance._

_“What’s up?” He questioned._

_“So… Remember when Slav was talking about alternate realities?” She asked, her expression falling ever so slightly in deep thought. Whatever it was on her mind was apparently a personal thought that needed a proper discussion._

_“Yeah,” He replied, tilting his head slightly. He wasn’t sure where she was going with this._

_“And remember when we were trapped in that one where the Altean’s were evil?”_

_“Yes, I do.” How could he forget?_

_“So… What if there was an alternate reality where we weren’t together?” She asked, and Lance frowned at that._

_“… What if?” He questioned skeptically. “What do you mean?”_

_“What if there was an alternate reality where we weren’t together?” The question was repeated as she moved just slightly closer to him._

_“I’d say that there probably is. Some other crazy reality where we aren’t together doesn’t sound farfetched.” Pidge’s head tilted to the side, as if truly taking in those words to heart. “Why do you ask?”_

_“So what do you think about that?”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“The idea that we aren’t together in some other reality…” Her voice dropped, her damp hair hanging low in her eyes. “What does that make you think?”_

_Lance wasn’t entirely sure where she was going with this. Where this weird question came from he wasn’t sure, but it seemed important to her. It deserved an answer; anything if it would make her feel better._

_“I think it’s weird,” He said simply. Pidge’s eyes lifted to meet his, her lips pulled tight in a frown. “But I think that in some other reality, whatever it is, we’re not together for a reason, and in this one we are. It wouldn’t make sense to us in another reality why we’re together while in this one it doesn’t make sense why we’re not, so… It’s weird.”_

_Lance’s hand lifted his fingers brushing against her warm skin softly to coax her head up. She didn’t look completely satisfied with the answer, but she looked like it struck a chord with her. The gears in that big brain of hers were turning, calculating and thinking._

_“What brought that on?” He spoke as softly as his hand touched her, wishing he could simply read her mind, but that wasn’t possible._

_“When I was taking a shower, I was thinking about how lucky I am to have you…” She began, leaning into his touch. Lance opened up his arms, pulling her against him so her head could rest against his shoulder. “And I wondered what I would do without you. I don’t really know how I thought about the alternate universe stuff, but it made me think about not being with you in other realities and… It kinda sucked.”_

_Lance breathed in deeply, his hands rubbing her shoulders and waist in an attempt to dispel some of the tension in her body._

_“Well, like I said before, it would make sense to us in other realities, but I can safely agree with you that it would suck not having you by my side.” He said, leaning back into the wall with Pidge still firmly in his arms. “But…” He added, piquing her curiosity. “It wouldn’t matter, because no matter where you are, or who you are, or who you’re with, I’m always going to find you.”_

_“You can’t promise that.” She muttered bitterly._

_“Oh, but I do.” He mused. Pidge could just imagine the look of confidence on his face without having to see it, and the thought made her smile. Some of his confidence always rubbed off on her, making her feel a little more hopeful than she actually felt. “I’d find you in Heaven.” He began, placing a kiss on top of her head. Pidge stifled a laugh, feeling his lips trace to her cheek._

_“Or in hell,” A kiss to her closed eyes. “Or on Earth,” A kiss against her neck. Pidge started giggling. “Or on some distant planet on the solar system.” A kiss to her shoulder where Lance’s shirt fell to the side. “Or in some other reality where we’re evil villains on a search for good guys to defeat.”_

_Pidge was laughing now, recoiling with every kiss to every ticklish spot on her body. He held her in his arms with a firm grip, keeping her at his mercy as he attacked her with nips of his teeth and kisses that ran across her skin in devious ways. He kept it up until she was rolling onto the bed, him laying overtop of her with his body pinning her in place. He held her hands in his own, fingers laced together, keeping them above her head so she couldn’t use them to push him away, even when he knew she wouldn’t._

_Her giggles turned into quiet hums, looking up at him with her bright smile and big eyes that shone through the dim lighting of his room. Something he had said got rid of the worries; he could tell by the way she smiled that she was feeling better. The weight was off of her shoulders now, and that in itself made him smile._

* * *

Katie didn’t sleep well for the next week. She was up late into the night, bombarded with her own internal problems. She couldn’t get her brain to shut up for five minutes to let her sleep, so it was down to only a few hours a night.

Worse than that, she hadn’t been to the coffee shop at all that week. She kept giving excuses each night, and she could tell that they were all getting worried about her.

Eventually she’d go back, and eventually she’d face them, him, but for now, she just needed to figure out what she was going to do.

She had always told herself that she would be fine so long as Lance was okay and alive, and that, if she ever met him in person again, they’d get along just fine as friends.

The problem was, however, that she didn’t want to be just friends. She’d been in love with him for so long, since the day she met him to the day she was reborn. She loved him, but he didn’t love her.

He didn’t know who she was, because he didn’t remember.

She had always thought that, if she ever met him again with a fate as similar as the others, she would be able to handle living with that knowledge. She’d come to find that she couldn’t.

_One new message._

_Shiro_

_9:25 p.m._

_“Hey Katie. We didn’t see you again tonight and we’re really worried. Are you okay?”_

Shiro had been the first to text her, but he wasn’t the last.

_Two new messages._

_Keith_

_9:30 p.m._

_“Hey, we’re worried about you. Are you ever coming back?”_

_“If it was about Hunk and I teasing you, we’re really sorry. We were just playing, and we didn’t think that would actually upset you.”_

To that she had to reply. Of course it wasn’t Keith and Hunk, and they deserved to know that. It wasn’t their fault.

She just didn’t know how to live like this anymore.

* * *

Two weeks later, Katie finally returned to the shop. Seven thirty, on the dot, walking in with her backpack on, per the usual, exhausted from a day of work. Hunk and Keith nearly jumped at the sound of the door opening, preparing themselves for more work, but when they saw that it was just her, their tired smiles brightened into real one.

“Katie!” They cheered in unison. Shiro, who seemed to be napping with his head on the table, looked up, seeing her slowly making her way to their booth.

“H-Hey guys…” She greeted sheepishly, rubbing the back of her neck while her cheeks flushed. She felt bad that she’d left them in the dust like this for nearly a month, but everyone came to her with open arms. She was sandwiched in between everyone, even picked up by Hunk, and her anxieties melted away so easily from it all.

Just like the good old days. She missed her friends.

“Don’t ever do that to us again, you hear me, Katie Holt?” Hunk reprimanded, squeezing her for good measure before letting her go.

“I’m sorry,” She apologized, her arms lingering around his big waist for a bit longer before letting go.

“You had us worried, Katie.” Keith said, patting her head when she turned to look at him. “I thought you were mad at us.”

“No, no, I wasn’t mad. I just had some things come up and…” _And I couldn’t stand to be near Lance._ “And I needed to take care of it.”

“Katie, you know that we’re always here for you, right?” Shiro asked. “If you ever need help with anything or ever need anyone to talk to, we’re always here for you.”

The older man’s words brought a burn to her eyes, but she fought back the tears.

“Thanks,” She said. “It means a lot to me.”

These weren’t people she needed to hide from. Even back then, they were always open to let her talk, and in return, if they ever needed anyone, she was always there for them. That shouldn’t have changed, but it was just something that couldn’t be talked through. She’d come to understand this.

“What are we celebrating out here?”

Katie froze up at the sound of his voice, feeling the air in her lungs turn cold and her knees shake. She hadn’t thought he’d be here tonight, at least not when she hadn’t immediately seen him, but Lance came out from the back with a rag, drying off a cup.

“Ah, just getting to see Katie again.” Hunk told him with a pat to her back. A little hard. More like a forceful shove in his direction.

Katie turned her head towards him, glaring daggers at him. His grin only proved that she was completely on to his antics. She wasn’t stupid.

“Oh, right. You’re the girl from a couple of weeks ago.”

She couldn’t lie and say that what he said didn’t hurt. _The girl,_ implying she wasn’t that important to him anymore. Yeah, it definitely hurt.

“Uh, yeah…” The young woman wasn’t entirely sure how to respond to that.

“Good to see you again,” He said, waving his rag-covered hand at her.

“Y-Yeah, good to see you again… Too…” Katie cleared her throat, pulling her phone from her pocket to check her email. Something if it meant getting rid of this horrible weight on her shoulders.

“Hey Hunk, how about you help me with getting the trash out?” Keith asked out of nowhere.

“Not a problem!” He eagerly agreed. “Hey Shiro, didn’t you need to tell me about that something from earlier?”

“Yes, as a matter of fact, I did.” Shiro said. “How about I help you guys with the trash so we can talk about it?”

“Sounds fantastic.” Keith said, quickly pacing himself to the backroom, where Hunk and Shiro followed. He didn’t even work there, and yet he was going into the back?

Those traitors.

“Do you need help with the trash?” Lance asked, looking back into the room with confusion.

“Nope!” Hunk replied.

“We’re good!” Keith added.

The door to the backroom shut, leaving the two of them alone in the room together. Katie felt like the world was suddenly laughing at her misery, taking in a deep breath just to let out an exasperated sigh.

“What the heck…?” Lance asked no one in particular. He looked back at Katie, offering up a bemused frown; all she could do was shrug her shoulders.

“They’re weird. You get used to it.” She offered, taking a seat at their booth.

No new emails and no text messages. Her only game would buy her so much time before they would come back, because surely they would stay out there for as long as possible.

The quiet hum of the lights above her head was a temporary distraction. She looked through her phone, looking at older messages and emails and hoping something would pop up. She even figured it’d be best to listen to some music for a bit, just until they felt like they had no time left to hide around before coming inside. Surely time would go by smoothly with little problems-

“Can I ask you something?”

_God damn it._

Katie looked up from her phone, not aware of the frown on her lips or the furrow in her brows. From his position by the counter, Lance could see the expression, taking it as the possibility that she didn’t want to talk to him.

“Huh…?” She uttered questionably. Maybe she hadn’t heard him right, or was completely delusional and he hadn’t said anything to begin with.

“Can I ask you something?” He asked again, closing up the glass case with their display. “If you don’t mind.” He then added.

“Oh, n-no, I don’t mind. Ask away.” That time she heard how uncomfortable she came across, and it didn’t help that her body language agreed. The way she sat, closed off with her backpack at her side, ready to leap up and run away again, or the way her hands ran up her forearms, feeling goosebumps rise on her pale skin. He always had that effect on her, no matter the situation (or reality).

“The last time I saw you, or, I guess the last time I met you, you left in a hurry.”

That wasn’t a question, but she knew he was leading up to it.

“Uh, yeah, I did…” She agreed, feeling her cheeks heat up.

“Was that because of me?” He asked, and the question seemed to come out of nowhere for her while being totally justified. “Did I offend you or… Something?”

“What…?” Katie gaped at him, truly surprised. “No, no, Lance. It had nothing to do with you, I swear.” She promised him, slightly sitting up from her seat where her knees met the back of the booth. Her sudden action was more or less surprising to Lance.

“Oh… Well that’s good.” He spoke up, smiling his brilliant smile that made it hard for her to stand. She had missed that smile so much. “I thought that maybe I had said something wrong.”

“No, not at all,” She assured him. “You’re really sweet- I-I mean nice. I just had something come up, and I needed to leave.”

She had hoped to hell and back that Lance couldn’t see the blush dusting her cheeks, but was it her eyes playing tricks on her, or was he blushing as well? It had to be the dim lighting of the café. It had to be.

“Well then, might I say that you’re really sweet too, which tells you something, because I work with sweets all day.” He said, motioning to the plates of desserts. “You know, like… Like cakes and… Stuff...”

Katie couldn’t help but giggle, covering her mouth to keep it hidden, but the wide smile and the flush of color on her cheeks betrayed her. Lance’s pickup lines were just as horrible as ever, but she wouldn’t change a thing about that. She never once thought in her previous life that she’d miss them, but they did their intended job. Her heart was aflutter and her knees were shaking.

“Uh, that was a lot craftier in my head.” He mentioned before clearing his throat, looking down at the cup he had now been mindlessly drying for upmost of ten minutes. He was starting to wear holes into the poor glass.

“Well I was going to say something really sweet about you too, but then you left me speechless.”

The look of sheer amazement that went across Lance’s face was absolutely priceless. It hadn’t been every day that Pidge Gunderson would reciprocate his horrible pickup lines with one of her own, mainly due to her lack of them. However, in this day and age, it was easy to look them up, and even easier to make Lance McClain flush a bright red color that reached from his cheeks to the tips of his ears, and to make him grin the biggest, goofiest smile she had ever seen on him.

This moment was perfect. Simply perfect, and it could only be ruined when their three friends finally came back into the room, all of them a shivering mess after having been outside in the chilly air for so long.

“Are you guys okay?” Katie asked, a frown taking over her lips when they came in with their arms wrapped around their own bodies.

“I-It’s kinda cold out.” Keith stammered, reaching for his sweater to yank it over his head.

“Fall decided to give us a surprise.” Shiro said, reaching for his now cooled cup of coffee. “Can I reheat this?”

“Be my guest,” Hunk offered, already heading for the machine to wrap his arms around it in hopes that it was still mildly warm.

“You guys are idiots.” Katie insulted, slowly rubbing the bridge of her nose.

“Hey, I needed to talk to Shiro in private anyway.” Hunk mentioned, but it fell on deaf ears as Katie ignored him in favor of walking towards their counter.

“Keith was there.” Lance proclaimed.

“I don’t count.” The black haired man said. Katie rolled her eyes, and for just a moment, she thought she heard Lance chuckle. She couldn’t be too sure if he really had or if her mind was playing tricks on her.

It had happened before. Times where she heard her friends talking and laughing, crying or screaming, or worse yet, moaning in agony and pain. She’d been woken up by these sounds multiple times throughout her life, and that wasn’t going to change anytime soon she feared.

At least now she could take a moment to breathe every time she heard them laugh, because she knew that this was real, and the memories that resurfaced, the pain she remembered that used to be a constant was no more. They were all here now, safe and alive. No one was hurt, no one was sick, and the chances of them dying were so slim.

There could be no promises made that something wouldn’t happen to them: That they’d get into a car accident, or that they could get sick. Maybe they got into a situation where someone ended up hurting them, or worse, but it wasn’t like before where that was a daily thing.

She could rest easy knowing that the screams that woke her up at night weren’t there.

* * *

Now that she had managed the biggest road block her life could offer her at this point in time, Katie found it much simpler to go back to the coffee shop. She went daily, just like before, with her backpack barely hanging from her shoulders as she dragged her feet through the door.

The cold weather didn’t help, but once everyone was there, Lance had enough energy left to make everyone a fresh pot of coffee. The warmth of her drink as she drank it and the feeling of heat emanating from the mug really eased her mind at the end of the day, even more so now that it was Lance doing it. It was never as nice when Hunk or Keith did it, as they usually served up whatever was left in the pots.

This was now a constant in her life. Nightly visits to the coffee shop, sitting together at the table, equally groaning about college life and exhaustion. All of them sitting with their legs sprawled out under the table, overlapping one another. Sometimes it was hard to tell whose leg was whose.

Any little bit of contact she got from Lance was like a blessing to her; when their legs brushed under the table or when he handed her a cup of coffee. Sometimes he’d make a remark and she’d bump her shoulder into his side to reprimand him (Lance was still as freakishly tall as every), and sometimes she’d let her arm stay close to his for just a few seconds longer.

Sometimes it felt like he let her.

Katie had feared that with Lance back in her life, things would be difficult. That she couldn’t go on knowing he knew nothing, and that the relationship they had and the love they once shared meant nothing to him, but while it killed her, there was still a sense of security and comfort she hadn’t felt in a long time, and that came from him just being there, breathing the same air she breathed and every now and again offering up a smile to her.

It was nice, and for once in her life, she was reminded of what it was like to be Pidge Gunderson, surrounded by her friends, her family, having small conversations that didn’t revolve around what they’d do if they ever got to go home.

She could live like this, she had decided, but she would never tell them anything.

* * *

“My life sucks…” Keith groaned, his head hidden under his hands against the table.

“It’ll be alright…” Shiro assured him, rubbing his shoulder with as much strength as he could muster up.

“What’ll be alright?” Katie asked, slowly trudging her way towards their table. She had just walked in, a couple minutes later than she normally was, and overheard their conversation, as well as others.

It seemed that two other tables had just a few customers left for the night, just finishing up, but still there. It happened every now and again, but so long as their table was open, she had no arguments.

“My teacher hates me.” Keith muttered, barely turning his head to regard the girl with a tired look. “And there’s this trip to the science center in the next state over I want to go to, but it’s expensive to go.”

“Is it something I could help out with?” She offered, noticing the frown followed shortly after from the taller teen.

“You got an extra three hundred in your pocket?”

“Three hundred?” She gaped at him, feeling more awake than she had been walking in. “How is it three hundred to go?”

“Travel, food, and it’s overnight.”

Keith sluggishly sat up, looking over to one of the tables with two younger woman sat at. One with long, blonde hair and blue eyes, and the other a black haired, dark skinned woman. Lance was bringing them their check with a wide smile, his natural charms making the two girls giggle to themselves, and when he turned away with their dishes in hand, they leaned close to exchange secrets with one another.

Katie had to ignore the burning feeling in her gut. This jealousy she should have simply ignored. Lance wasn’t hers in this life, and she needed to remember that. Someday, sooner or later, he was going to date someone. Maybe he already was, and that meant that she needed to be happy for him and simply let him do his thing.

Whether she wanted him to or not.

“Do you see that?” Keith asked with a pointed thumb towards the table.

“Unfortunately,” She muttered under her breath, too quiet for anyone to actually hear her.

“Lance gets all the girls to fall for him,” Shiro expressed his slight amazement when he noticed the girls leave behind something that looked like a twenty.

“He does it to get better tips.” Keith mentioned, leaning back into his seat. “All that flirting he does gets him awesome tips. Do you know he got a forty dollar tip from a girl earlier? Just one girl. I’d love to earn that kind of money in a single day.”

“You need to start flirting with people then.” Shiro told him with a faux smile.

“I don’t know how to flirt,” He mentioned.

“Then start practicing…” 

Keith sighed, his dark eyes slowly looking towards Katie. He leaned forward just the slightest, his hands sliding across the table as she crossed her own across his chest.

“Don’t even think about it,” She stopped him dead in his tracks.

Keith dropped his head down on the table with a groan, knowing it was a lost cause.

“How am I supposed to practice then?” He asked with what sounded like a whine, which wasn’t a usual thing for Keith to do.

Shiro slowly slid out of the booth seat beside him, a glint of mischievous behavior in his eyes.

“You could always practice with Matt.” He muttered, loud enough for the man sitting beside him to hear, before backing up a few steps.

Keith lifted his head, a look of horror and fear with some form of shock written across his face. His head turned to Shiro after a quick glance at Katie to confirm that she had indeed heard that information before jumping from his seat. The older man darted out of the café at a speed Katie hadn’t seen him pick up in this life before, Keith close behind with loud threats of murder following shortly after. The few people in the café were surprised to say the least, looking out of the windows to see the chase through the thick glass.

They could still hear Keith threatening to kill him for blowing his secret.

“What’s going on out there?”

Katie turned to look up at the brunette standing by their table, a cup of fresh coffee in his hands that he promptly set down in front of her. When had he even gotten there?

“Shiro happened to mention his crush on my brother.” Katie said, looking down in the mug and- wait.

This was hot chocolate, not coffee. With whipped cream melted and shaped into a heart.

“Were we supposed to act like we didn’t know that?”

The question went around her head for a moment. She was trying to calm the feeling in her heart, the pounding in her chest as it tried to escape.

It meant nothing. It was just a cute little design he did. Nothing more, nothing less.

“Huh…?” The question he had asked finally took precedent in her mind. “How did you know about that?”

“Hunk told me,” Lance said, slowly moving to slide into the booth across from her. “I thought everyone knew though.”

“We do. We just act like we don’t.” She said, slowly taking up the warm mug into her hands and ignoring the way her heart felt like it was ready to leap out of her throat.

“Ohh, my mistake.” He chuckled, and for a moment she was sure that her heart stopped beating. She took a sip of her drink, and goosebumps rose on her flesh as the chocolate substance warmed her up, making the shivering of her bones cease. The melted cream was just an extra sweet treat that made her sigh blissfully. “Is it good?” Lance asked with a smile despite already knowing the answer.

“It’s perfect. Thank you, Lance…” She said, leaning back in her seat to take in the warm feeling spreading through her entire body. She knew it wasn’t just the hot chocolate, but she’d be damned if he thought otherwise.

“You were late, so I figured you had a good reason for me to make it,” He offered.

“It’s exactly what I needed after my microbiology test today…” She explained with closed eyes.

Finally the last table was leaving. Lance offered up a smile to the two young woman who had been gossiping at their table, taking their time to leave. As they passed, he waved to them, telling them both to have a great night.

The way they both sounded as they said their goodbyes was almost nauseating to Katie. She could just imagine their faces without having to see them, knowing they were giggling and blushing messes like school girls. It was ridiculous.

_Get yourself together, Pidge. You don’t have a reason to be jealous anymore._

“About time they finally left.” Hunk called from the kitchen, followed by the sound of him tossing a metal spatula into the sink.

“Yeah, they sure took their time.” Lance agreed, leaning back into his seat now that the eyes of the public were off of him.

“We all know why,” Katie couldn’t help the slight bit of irritation that slipped as she spoke, hiding the frown she wore behind her mug.

“Uh, wanna fill me in then? Cause I don’t,” Lance said.

“Oh come on, Lance.” She grimaced. “They were checking you out. It was annoying how much they were giggling and snickering every time you turned around.” She explained, and again her annoyance showed, but, despite that, Lance didn’t seem too put off by it.

“Oh…” He uttered.

“Pretty sure they left you a twenty on that table too.” She added, looking down at her lap past her coffee mug.

This really wasn’t okay. Lance wasn’t hers in this life, and as much as she wanted him to remember and for them to pick up where they left off before they both died, it just couldn’t happen. She needed to accept that and let him go on with his own life.

Maybe then she could get on with hers.

“Well that’s all fine and dandy, but I’m not really interested in them.” Lance muttered, leaning his elbow on the table so his chin could rest in his palm.

“Girls…?”

“Yes and no. It’s not that I’m not interested in girls, because I am, but… I’ve… Already got my eyes on someone.” He told her.

Katie’s heart lurched in her chest from the words, blinking back tears. She had imagined that happening plenty of times within the two months they had now known each other, but actually hearing it did something to her she couldn’t even begin to process.

“O-Oh…?” She uttered questionably, looking up and hoping that her emotions weren’t screaming at him through her eyes.

The expression on Lance’s face wasn’t something she was expecting, however. It wasn’t something she normally saw from him before, but it was something she recognized, if not vaguely. Like he was deep in thought, void of emotions, but his eyes spoke so much more, and his blue eyes, as blue as she remembered, were staring right into hers.

A moment of silence went by, and the longer she waited, the more she felt completely awkward. She shouldn’t have been allowing this to happen.

“U-Uhm-”

“Man, I’m beat.” Hunk came out from the kitchen, spooking the two younger adults while he walked up to their booth. “I just want to get out of here.”

“Me too,” Lance agreed, sitting up straighter than he had been, almost like he had been caught doing something he shouldn’t have been doing.

“Well get cleaning so we can get out of here!” Hunk exclaimed, playfully slapping his shoulder with the towel he had slung over his shoulder. “I’m not cleaning this mess up by myself, and where’s Keith?”

“Still chasing Shiro,” Katie told him. “I think they made it to China by now.”

“Good, less help for us then.” Hunk groaned, his shoulders dropping. “Unless you want to help.”

“As much as I’d love to,” She began, slowly sliding out from her seat. “I have a paper due tomorrow and I really need to work on it.”

“Traitor,” Hunk remarked, but with a smile and a gentle pat to her arm. “Good luck on it. See you tomorrow?”

“But of course,” She assured him, swinging her backpack around on her shoulders. “See you tomorrow, Lance.”

“See ya,” He said with a small wave of his hand, finally getting up to clear the last two tables, plus their own. She hadn’t even finished her hot chocolate, but he didn’t seem to mind.

Katie stepped into the brisk air outside, the dark and cool gusts of wind making it even colder. She pulled her jacket tighter around herself, yanking her hood up to cover her head as she began her small trek back home.

Keith and Shiro were nowhere in sight, which meant that they really had gone on a bit of a run. Maybe they really did make it to China, or even Japan. Shiro was running home to hide with his family in hopes that Keith couldn’t find him.

The idea made her smile, spreading her cold, pink cheeks apart.

“Katie!”

The young brunette was only halfway down the block when she heard her name being called out. She turned, looking past her shoulder to see Lance chasing her down, left in only his long sleeved shirt with his cape still on. Obviously it wasn’t enough to keep him warm, and when he got to her, he bent over his knees, hacking up for cold air he couldn’t seem to take in.

“Uh, Lance…?” She asked, reaching down to grab his shoulders and keep him steady. “Are you okay?”

“Y-Yeah, I’m fine,” He heaved a deep breath, but he didn’t sound okay. He was practically wheezing from the cold air.

“Yeah, that’s convincing.” Katie remarked sarcastically, resisting the urge to roll her eyes.

“Listen…” Lance began, his back straightening up despite feeling like he wanted to curl up into a ball. “You… You wanna go out Friday night?”

Katie stared for a moment with wide, brassy eyes and pink cheeks. Maybe for a moment too long even. The longer she stood silently, letting the words play over and over again to take in their meaning, the more Lance seemed to become uncomfortable. Lance wasn’t normally the type of person to show his troubled thoughts, but maybe thinking that she’d reject him actually did something to him.

It wasn’t like the question hadn’t just shut down all of her systems of course.

“Go out?” She finally questioned, and she was pretty sure that if cars stopped rushing by, Lance would be able to hear her heart pounding out of her chest. “L-Like a… A date?”

“Well… Yeah,” Lance looked away, rubbing the back of his neck. He hadn’t been out here that long, so there was no way to argue that the flush of color on his cheeks was from the cold. “There’s a small fair downtown on Friday night, with some games and stuff like that. I thought… You know, maybe you’d like to go… W-With me.”

Systems down. Offline. In need of a reboot.

“There’s some good food, and at the end, they blast off some pretty cool fireworks.”

“I-I remember it from last year, actually.” She said, remembering the day her and Matt had spent together while he was visiting. They even took her dog to the fair too.

“Oh…” Lance uttered, and from the sound of it, he took that as her way of saying no.

“I-It was fun. I wouldn’t mind going again.” She spoke quickly, maybe even a little too quickly, but she wanted Lance to understand that she wanted to go. More than anything, it meant spending time with him outside of the coffee shop, and the idea had her heart soaring.

“Really…?” He asked, breathing a sigh of relief and very much aware of how relived he seemed.

“Yeah. I don’t have any late classes, so that’ll be a nice break.” She said, nodding her head in agreement.

“Alright then,” Lance’s mood seemed to skyrocket from her answer, his smile so big and bright she thought that it might stretch his cheeks apart. “That’s great, uh… Well, I’ll see you Friday night then?”

“I mean, I’ll still see you tomorrow too.” Katie lightly joked.

“Right, right. I remember that.” Lance clapped his hands together, rocking back and forth on his heels as a meager distraction. “Uh, so I’ll see you tomorrow then, and uh… Friday?”

“Friday,” She agreed. “Would seven be too late?”

“No, that’s perfect.” Lance took a couple of steps back, as if preparing to leave. “So, see you Friday at seven.”

“And tomorrow.” She told him again.

“And tomorrow,” He repeated, and with a small wave of his hand, he turned to run back inside before he froze to death.

Even though she was cold, Katie was pretty sure this was the warmest she had ever been in her life.

* * *

In hindsight, picking out an outfit for a first date shouldn’t have been as difficult as it had been. They had dates before the life she once lived, but that was in the midst of a war.

Going on dates together was them staying up half of the night playing their rigged up video game, accusing one another of cheating, and then calling it quits when they were too tired to go on. Dates for them were hanging back in Lance’s quarters (hers were practically inhabitable due to the mess), and watching pirated movies on her laptop. Dates for them meant taking dinner Hunk would prepare back to the observation deck and eating under the stars, their only light source being two tubes of diphenyl oxalate.

Those were their usual dates for them, and this was in between battles and catching up on sleep, as well as finding her father and training, but they were nice.

Those times together were what kept her sane above all else.

Katie stilled, looking at herself in the mirror as she thought about it.

Not once had she ever tried to impress Lance. They fell in love almost effortlessly, and it was almost, because no relationship was perfect. What they had she felt was damn near close though. As close as she could get to perfection, and he made it so easy.

They never had to try, so why should now be any different?

Whatever happened, happened. She couldn’t change the outcome, and going to such lengths to make sure he liked her was stupid. If he liked her, then so be it. If it didn’t work out, despite how painful it was to think about, then she’d have to go on.

With that in mind, Katie tossed away the fancy dress she hadn’t worn since she read her dissertation out loud in front of her college professors. It was too cold for that anyway.

She eyed a pair of leggings she normally wore with shorts and went with that and a light purple sweater. Today was warmer than it had been, but if they were out late, she was going to get cold fast.

Katie opted for her hair pulled back in a ponytail, looped through the back of her beanie to keep it out of her face. Like this she was warm, and at least presentable for a date.

A date she was more or less nervous to. Anxious. Excited. A whole bunch of other adjectives her mind couldn’t currently think of, because her doorbell rang, and Rover began his usual process of barking at the door.

She paced from her room, shushing the dog so he didn’t disturb her neighbors. She grabbed at his collar, yanking him back from the door before opening it and seeing Lance on the other side, bundled up snuggly with a scarf around his pink cheeks.

“Hey Katie,” He greeted her, his voice muffled by his scarf.

“Hey Lance,” She said just before Rover tugged her forward, sniffing at Lance’s feet enthusiastically. “Rover, down boy!”

“He’s alright,” Lance assured her, bending down to pet the Jindo’s head. “My parents have two dogs, so I’m used to it.” Katie smiled at the news, pulling Rover back inside so he could come in.

“Come on in, Lance.” She offered, and he followed. The second the door was shut, she allowed Rover free, who promptly jumped up on his hind legs to reach for Lance. “Rover…” She reprimanded him, but the dog took nothing from it.

“Aren’t you a good little pupper?” Lance mused, ruffling his hand between Rover’s pointy ears.

 “I just have to feed him really quick and we can go.” Katie told him, clapping her hands to alert her dog about dinner. Rover jumped away from him, following her call as she scurried to the kitchen to get his food.

“You have a nice place,” Lance told her, not straying too far from the front door.

“Thanks,” She said, distracting herself with pouring Rover’s dry dog food into his bowl.

“Do you live here by yourself?” He asked, looking around the apartment.

There was very little that let him into the world of Katie Holt. All that really spoke of her were the few pictures of her and her family. Of her and someone who must have been Matt, because there was no way the two of them weren’t siblings. There were more pictures of them together, however, than of her with her parents, and the ones he did see didn’t scream _“warm, friendly family.”_ Her smiles looked so forced in most of the pictures, her eyes not as bright as he had seen them.

Lance tried to tell himself that maybe she didn’t like getting her picture taken, but he knew that wasn’t it. Not when she looked genuinely happy to be standing next to her brother in the other pictures.

“Yeah, but my parents help me with rent while I’m in school, so…” She trailed off as she gave Rover his food, who greedily chomped down. ”Uh, you ready to go?”

Lance adverted his gaze from her pictures, taking in the striking difference from her smile in the picture to the one she wore now.

It was unsettling to say the least, thinking that she ever needed to fake a smile.

“Yeah,” He agreed.

* * *

“You look really nice tonight, by the way.” Lance spoke up, his arm accidentally brushing up against her shoulder. She may have wished that it stayed there just a bit longer, but she knew better.

“O-Oh, thanks.” She stuttered, blushing, but it was chilly enough that it could be passed off from the cold.

The two of them looked to the entrance of the fair, getting a look at all of the stands, games, and just about anything else a small fair for their town could offer. The pungent smell of freshly cooked fair foods hit their noses, and the two of them let out a collective sigh.

“Someone made something good.” Lance said, looking about for the source of the smell.

“Don’t tell Hunk we cheated on him tonight, okay?” Katie pleaded with him, looking towards a stands with a bunch of artwork for sale.

“Of course not. I value my precious face,” He said with mock offense, pressing his hand into his chest.

“There’s a lot of art stands here this year,” The young brunette observed, seeing a cart with hand crafted jewelry in it.

“There is,” Lance agreed. “You like arts and crafts?”

“Depends on it, I guess. I’m not one for the creative DIY’s, but the artwork is nice.” Katie explained, slowly walking forward.

She wasn’t entirely sure if she was following Lance, or Lance was following her. The two of them seemed perfectly in step, their feet almost dragging slowly through the dying grass.

“Eh, me either. They’re fun to look at though.” Lance said.

The two of them were slowly making their way through the fair. It wasn’t often it was here, so it was pretty crowded. More often then not did Lance brush up against her, and each time did Katie feel like it was a small gift from whatever entity existed up there. The warmth of his body hadn’t changed with reality.

Katie had been on dates before in this life. She’d met a few guys, tried to move on, but there always the horrible, awkward tension on the first date. The silence. The uncomfortable disconnection that two tried to fill to avoid the horrendous silence, but in her case, it never worked out.

With Lance, it was always so easy. It was so easy to fall into comfortable silence, never having to worry about entertaining one another, because they had always been so good with each other. They didn’t need words when they were fine simply taking in one another’s presence.

It was the same for her now, but did Lance feel the same way? Was he panicking about having to talk? Was he trying to think of something to say to avoid the silence? Or was he simply relaxing having to know he didn’t need to try around her, because she was already so madly in love with him?

It was hard to say. Every time she glanced at him, his blue eyes were looking curiously about the fair, his expression so relaxed to her. She could read him so easily that it was ridiculous.

Lance would never know how much she already knew of him, but maybe that was a good thing.

“Hey look,” Lance said, pointing forward. Katie’s cheeks felt warm as she looked away from him, following his pointing finger to the first game they had seen. It was nothing glamorous; it was a simple game of knocking over bottles with a baseball, but it was something. It even had prizes. “Wanna try that?” He asked.

“Sure,” She agreed. Lance’s steps were quicker now, pacing to the stand with Katie right at his heels. There was already a couple with kids ahead of them, so they waited patiently. While they did, Katie couldn’t help but look at the wall of prizes, all of them stuffed animals of some variety.

Her eyes were instantly drawn to the stuffed, green lion hanging at the top from its tail. A green lion that remarkably looked so much like _her_ green lion. It made her heart ache to see it, and now she was more than convinced that she needed it.

“Next up to the field!” The man at the stand announced as the family in front of them left. Lance and Katie moved forward, Lance pulling his wallet out.

“How much?”

“Three bucks for three balls, or nine dollars for ten.” The man told him. Lance pulled out nine dollars, figuring it best to split it half way.

“We’ll take ten balls then.” He told the gentlemen. The man took the money with a grin, pulling out the baseballs and going back to setting up the pins.

“I could have paid.” Katie told him.

“No worries.” He shrugged his shoulders, seemingly unaffected by the the offer.

“… So what are you going to get if you win?” She asked him.

“ _If…?_ I am truly insulted,” Lance said with a moue of disinterest.  “I happen to have the best aim in the world.” Katie couldn’t help but roll her eyes at his exuberance.

“Lance, those bottles are filled with dense sand. Even if you hit them, they won’t fall over easily.” Of course, there were no ifs about it. If Lance was anything like he was in his last life, Katie was fully aware that he wouldn’t miss. These games were meant to pull money from people, which clearly wasn’t fair, but if anyone could do it though, it was Lance.

“I got this,” He told her and picked up one of the balls.

“So when you get it,” She assured him. “What are you going to get?”

“Not much for myself.” Lance told her, aiming towards the stacked bottles. “But I know what you want.”

“What…?” Had she been that obvious? “You don’t know.”

Lance lined up his shot, one eye closed, and threw the ball. Not only was it a direct hit, but it practically shot through the stack of bottles, sending them down to the ground for the man who ran the stand to gawk at him.

“I…” Lance brushed at his shoulder like there was dirt there. “Am the master.”

Katie could help but laugh, from Lance’s grand posture to the man’s bewildered expression. Clearly he’d taken everyone by surprise.

“And that was only one shot.” She said, grabbing for her own ball to take a throw. She knew she wasn’t going to achieve what he could, but it was worth a shot.

Or five. Whatever she did hit barely made a bottle tumble, but at least it was a show for everyone else.

The girl shrugged her shoulders. It looked like the green lion stuffed toy was far from her grasp, but she’d find a way to get it. Just knowing there was something that looked so much like her lion made her feel pretty good.

“Ah well… You still have four balls left.” Katie said, pointing to the table.

“The next family can have them.” He said. “I only needed one shot anyway.”

“So what would you like, son?” The man asked of him, pointing to the wall of toys. Lance gave a side glance to Katie with what could only be described as a Cheshire grin across his lips.

“I’ll take that green lion on the top.” He said, pointing towards the toy placed on top of the wall.

Katie’s eyes widened at him, surprised to say the least. He acted like he couldn’t even see her gawking at him as the man grabbed the toy from up top and handed it to him.

“There you go,” The man said.

“Thanks,” Lance told him, turning to Katie and holding it out for her. “For you, madam.”

“Lance…” Katie took up the stuffed lion in her hands, her heart aching and pounding and doing all sorts of crazy summersaults in her body. The fur was soft and cold to the touch, tickling under her chin, and the paws were made of a silken material that felt good against her neck. “Thank you… Y-You didn’t have to do this.”

“Well she looked like she needed a good home to go to.” Lance said with such a soft smile, his hand reaching to softly punch her arm. “So long as Rover knows what his toys look like.”

Katie laughed, and if she didn’t have better control over herself, she would have cried. This meant more to her than he realized, but busting out into tears would only scare him and everyone else away, so she didn’t.

“I love it…” Maybe that was a little straight forward, but it was true. She loved this stuffed toy to death already, and could already assume that, next to Rover, it was nearest and dearest to her heart.

“I’m glad,” Lance said, holding out his arm. Katie smiled against the lion’s head, reaching to wrap her arm through his. “Have you eaten yet?”

“No, not yet.”

“Great, because I’m starving.”

* * *

The two of them found what looked to be the best (and cleanest) stall to get food from. Lance got himself a hot dog, some fries, and a soda while Katie managed a funnel cake and a water. The smaller of the two looked around the fair for an empty table, or even a place to sit. It seemed to be packed this year, and there weren’t a lot of good options for seating. Lance, however, seemed to have better ideas.

“Follow me,” He said, motioning away with his head and walking forward. Katie followed close behind, holding her lion close to her chest with her food in her hands. Lance directed her away from the crowds, away from the stalls and booths and face painting to a little path just outside of the fair.

“Where are you going, Lance?” She asked him as they began on a path hidden deep in trees and bushes.

“I found this spot a couple of years ago. It’s really quiet so we can eat, but it also has this great view of the fireworks.” He told her, maneuvering through the pathway like he knew it all too well. He probably did.

“Taking me to secluded spot in a forest away from people?” Katie asked with a chuckle. “This is where I’m gonna die.”

“No it’s not,” He retorted, rolling his eyes. It was only a couple more minutes of walking around, the area much colder with all of the trees in the way. The walked up a small hill, not much of a trek, but they finally made it to where Lance had been talking about.

It was a small little clearing through the trees, the grass long, but not overgrown. Fall had killed a lot of the plant life, but some of the leaves still clung to their spots on the trees, some bushes still covered, but withering away, and in the center of it all was a small blanket already set up.

“Lance,” She spoke in an almost disparaging manner, but it was too lighthearted to be taken as an insult. “You planned this, didn’t you?”

“Guilty as charged,” He said with a hand up to his chest. The smaller brunette rolled her eyes as the two made their way to the blanket, just so they could plop down and relax.

This little hide out Lance had found was nice. It was secluded, but not so far away that they couldn’t hear the banter of the fair. They had total privacy if they really wanted it.

“This is pretty cool, Lance.” She told him. “How did you find this place?”

“I like to take walks, and sometimes I find myself in some interesting places.” Lance explained, reaching for a couple of his fries. Now that they were finally settled, they could finally eat.

“When do you find the time to take walks in between work and school?” She asked him.

“When I have the time, I guess. Even if that means at five in the morning.”

“Eww,” Katie laughed.

“I know, but at least it gets me out.” Lance remarked, covering his mouth so he didn’t openly talk with his mouth full of food. Katie chuckled lightly again, taking a big sip of her water that was too cold for this kind of weather, but that was alright. Somehow she was still pretty warm, and without wanting to feel like a horrible teen romance movie, she had a feeling that it was because Lance was sitting right beside her.

“So uh…” She began, holding her funnel cake in her lap. “What time does the fireworks start?”

“Should be any minute now.” Lance said. “I was afraid it’d be too light out, but I forgot that the sun sets earlier now.”

“Yeah. Kind of throws you off, doesn’t it?”

“Yeah, but…” Lance set his food down to lay back on the blanket it, looking up at the sky. “That just means I get to enjoy this sight more.”

Katie hesitated for a moment before laying down next to him, looking up to see the constellations far above them, glistening in the dark night.

“Oh wow…”

Katie didn’t take time out of her day to look up at the stars, mainly because it hurt too much to do so. Looking up at them meant thinking back to the life she once lived, and how she was a part of those stars. She knew these constellations by heart and then some, but it killed her to know she’d never be a part of them again.

This right here, however, wasn’t at all what she expected. Maybe it was the time of day, or that it was cold enough to make her numb, or even because it was Lance laying here next to her, looking up at the stars with a bright gleam in his blue eyes, but she felt so much lighter. Almost as if she were floating.

It had been a very long time since she had felt like this before. The only time she could remember, a time that was only ever akin to this feeling was when she was actually in her lion.

“Hey Katie…” Lance said. The smaller brunette blinked, realizing that he was looking at her with a gentle smile, but also realizing in horrific shock that she had been staring at him the whole time.

“Uh, s-sorry…” She uttered, looking back up to the stars.

“I know I’m handsome and all, but I figured the stars could keep you distracted.” He retorted with a playful laugh. Katie had to avoid jumping when he scooted closer to her.

“Oh please, Lance…” She groaned, covering her face.

Twenty plus years later after god knows how long of separation from their lives, and he still teased her so easily. She heard him chuckle again, something so sinfully warm that was much closer to her this time, and much lower. Katie couldn’t help but look up at him, but it was too late. Her eyes were trapped in that beautiful, blue stare of his, taking in the closeness, the feeling of his breath every time he breathed out, and the contact of their arms brushing together.

It came with a startling realization of just how much she missed this. How much she missed this close, tender behavior from him. She had always told herself that knowing he was alive would be enough, but she had been lying to herself. She knew that now. She wouldn’t be truly happy until all of the space between them would be sealed off, leaving them in blissful ignorance. She wouldn’t be happy until they could pick up where they left off, and until she could scream to the heavens about how much she loved him.

She realized that now, as they laid side by side under the stars, gazing up at one another in the silence, with only a few crickets and shouts from the fair to break it.

“You look…” Lance began, licking his lips. Katie’s eyes darted down just a fraction of a second to see his tongue peeking out from behind his lips before looking back to him. If he noticed it, he didn’t say anything. “Really pretty tonight…”

“… You said that earlier.” She told him.

“No, I said you looked nice, which…” Lance let out a heavy breath he hadn’t realized he had been holding. “Was a lie, because I didn’t want to scare you off by saying what I really thought.”

“Really…?” That was a rhetorical question. “And what were you really thinking?” That wasn’t.

She ever so slightly jumped at the feeling of a hand touching her arm. Just a light brush against her sweater, but it was enough to have her heart pounding in her chest.

“That you look beautiful…” He said, and his fingers danced gracefully up her arm. “And that… I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you recently. There’s just… Something about you.”

“I’m weird…” She mumbled, more as an insult, but he didn’t seem to think so.

“Then I must be weird then too. Even weirder for thinking about you so much…”

Lance’s hand stopped at her shoulders, his thumb brushing against where her skin showed under her sweater. His fingers were cold in contrast to the warmed skin under her clothes, but it was so relaxing. At the same time, it made her mind wander thousands of miles a minute.

“That’s not a bad thing…” Her voice was soft, almost a whisper. There was no need to speak so loudly when they were so close, and when the distance had disappeared, she wasn’t sure. She couldn’t say she cared either, because she didn’t. Not when his hand moved up to her cheek, cold fingers lighting brushing the skin under her eyes like it had been practiced.

She tried to swallow down the jealousy when she thought about how he might have been like this with other girls.

“Hey Katie…” His voice was as quiet as hers.

“Hmm…?”

“Can… Can I kiss you?”

Jealousy gone.

Katie tried hard not to smile like an idiot, because really, her heart was on cloud nine. She had dreams for years about the moment where she could finally kiss him again. To have him this close, feeling his breath fan out on her skin. To feel the warmth emanating from his skin like a heater while his eyes stared right through her entire being.

Long ago she had considered it a fantasy she could only relive in her memories, but maybe there was a god, because Lance was waiting for an answer.

Katie timidly nodded her head, feeling herself shake, but she couldn’t tell if it was from the cold or anticipation anymore. The amount of relief that seemed to flood through the taller brunette was almost comical in a way, because it should have been her feeling that way, but the mutual feelings ran both ways.

With a hand still barely grazing her cheek, Lance leaned forward. Slow and hesitant, his eyes dipped low to look at her red lips, his thumb brushing under her eye for just a moment longer. Katie barely had it in her not to pull him in to close the distance, instead lifting her head just slightly so their noses could brush together. The little jolt from him made her fear that she’d done something wrong, but her fears were pushed to the side when he moved forward again, and this time, their lips brushed.

In all of her life, Katie couldn’t quite recall the exact feeling of his lips. She remembered them being impossibly soft compared to her bitten, chapped lips, and that they were warm. The memories, however, couldn’t compare to the real thing, and she wondered how she went twenty-two years without this.

Still as soft and warm as ever, with a hint of dampness to them, most likely from his chapstick. Katie was pleasantly surprised by the way her heart stopped hammering, like Lance’s mere presence relaxed every wound up nerve in her body and helped her breathe easy, and yet she practically melted into the ground.

She was unaware of when her own hand lifted, moving to his neck where her chilled fingers pressed into his skin, feeling a racing heartbeat beneath her fingertips. She was also unaware of when she went from laying on her back to rolling more onto her side, but she didn’t care. She was calm for the first time since she could remember, and that was fine.

That didn’t mean she wanted the kiss to stop.

When Lance pulled away, with a puff of warm air, maybe a laugh or a chuckle leaving him, she felt it against her lips, shivered, and opened her eyes to see him looking at her.

The kiss ended too soon. It just wasn’t enough. She needed more from him.

“… A-Again…?” She asked, her voice a small plea.

Lance didn’t respond right away, and not in a manner she figured best. He smiled that honest, warm smile he had. Not the one where he was usually overly cocky and aware of how great he was. It was the one he showed when something made him truly happy, and whatever it was that caused it, she wanted it to continue forever. Whatever it meant to get him to smile like this for the rest of her life.

Soon enough did he move close again, sealing his lips over hers with a little more pressure than before. It wasn’t as chaste, but still just as warm. His fingers dipped back into her hair, like he was keeping her in place as he subconsciously moved to lay on his side.

Katie couldn’t help but sigh as her hand that had been on his neck moved higher, fingers pressing under his ear and below his jaw. Lance had always been kind of sensitive there, and if that hadn’t changed, it should have given her the desired effect.

Which it did. Lance tilted his head, deepening the kiss while giving out a soft moan. Almost unnoticeable if she hadn’t been so close. Katie considered herself greedy for taking it all in, but she couldn’t resist.

This was all she had ever wanted. The closeness. The contact. His lips on hers. For his arms to be wrapped around her in this safe little bubble the two had once created for one another and never letting go.

Was it so much to ask for?

She whimpered lightly, her eyes burning with tears she refused to shed. She put her focus into kissing him; into reciprocating his actions, tilting her head, her nails lightly scratching his skin to give him goosebumps while their bodies pressed tightly together. Lance’s free arm moved under her head like a pillow, pulling her close. The other left her hair to sit low on her waist, feeling where her sweater raised to expose the skin of her hip.

His touches almost burned, as if everywhere he touched left a fire in its wake. Such a simple touch, and yet she was submitting to it fully, allowing it and whatever else he wanted to do. If he wanted to go farther or leave it at this, she didn’t care. So long as his hands wouldn’t leave her.

Although, she couldn’t be faulted for wanting to go farther.

Such an act had her body moving on its own accord, pressing into his own with hesitancy. Was it too much? Moving too fast? Katie knew Lance better than anyone, but not in this life time. It would have been safer to say that _Pidge_ knew Lance, not her, but he seemed okay with the act of intimacy. More than okay, actually, as he pressed forward as well.

The light, gentle brushes of lips grew bolder. The touches that went from soft and feather light became heavier. Katie’s arms eventually wound around his neck while he moved to lay overtop of her, his hands bracing himself up on either side of her head while their hips slotted together.

It wasn’t her fault that she moaned against his lips. That was completely and totally his doing, and he seemed to be willing to take on the responsibility for his actions.

Her legs tightened in an attempt to clench together, but his hips had her pinned, trapped in place. She couldn’t move besides little tuts of her hips, which only created a heat to numbing to keep her thoughts on track. Lance wasn’t helping with the way one of his hands fell to her hip, teasing the skin barely visible with a heavy touch. His fingers searing into her skin, gripping and holding on like the world was falling apart about them.

It felt like it. It wasn’t like it hadn’t already happened once, and she’d suffered the consequences enough.

All she wanted was to hold him. To have his lips on hers, his hands holding her in place, pinning her and never letting her go. To just be trapped in that blue stare for the rest of her life.

She had never wanted something so much in this life time. The only thing comparable to it would be trying to find Matt and her father once before. That was the only thing that could compare to this painful compression in her chest, this ache, like she couldn’t breathe, but every rough press of lips to hers was both helping her breathe again and taking it away just as fast.

Her head was spinning. Her body was numb. It was hard to breathe, and everything on her felt like fire. It almost hurt to want him as badly as she did, but she would rather suffer than stop. She didn’t wait this long to simply let it stop. Not when she had him in her arms again. Not when he had exactly what she had been praying for.

Not when-

The two of them jumped at the sound of a screech. Breaking apart and panting, the young adults looked off in the distance, watching an explosion of colors and golden embers fall from the sky. Another sound akin to the first followed shortly after, and another burst of light, this time with small eruptions of blue colors following behind it.

The sky lit up with the fireworks, each one blasting off at different intervals to create a show worth seeing. The show they had originally intended to see until this small session began.

Lance looked down at the girl trapped beneath him, taking in her flushed cheeks, nose, and ears, her long hair a tangled mess thanks to his hands. He took in the sight of her lips red and slightly swollen from their kisses, and the way her chest rose and fell with her heavy breathing, her sweater pulled back to show off her collar bones, and when he had done that, he wasn’t sure.

He too was panting. Lance wasn’t even aware that he wore an expression much similar to hers, minus the small problem between his legs, where his jeans were ever so slightly tented. If she could feel it, she wasn’t saying anything about it.

“Uhm…” He uttered, followed by a nervous laugh. “So that happened…”

“It did…” She returned with, a small smile gracing her kiss swollen lips. Her smile was infectious, and despite the ever present problem currently trapped between them and the knowledge that the two of them had just made out on their first date only, he couldn’t help but smile. He even laughed a little, a sound that resembled heaven’s trumpets to Katie.

She joined in on the laughter, and it was like a domino effect.

Lance fell over on his side in a fit of laughter, Katie rolling over to face him as her chest tightened with how good this felt. How _right_ it felt. Laying here like this under the stars, laughing with Lance like no one was asking anything from them within the next twenty four hours, with a firework show dancing in the sky.

In the back of her mind, she swore she heard a voice. Just a small voice, but something so familiar, like family, telling her that everything was going to be alright.

* * *

“I’m glad you had fun tonight…”

Katie searched through her back pack, looking for her keys as Lance spoke. It was kind of hard to do with the green lion toy still cradled close to her chest.

“I did,” She said, looking up at him with a smile when she had successfully found her keys. “I had a lot of fun really, and, _again_ , thank you for getting me this.” Her grip around the stuffed animal tightened. “It means a lot to me.”

“It was easy,” He said with a wave of his hand. “If it were some sort of diamond in a museum, well then we’re going to have to start talking about money.”

Katie giggled into the fuzzy mane of the lion, her cheeks long since tinted rouge.

“I’m surprised you’d go that far.”

“For you…? Anything.”

Lance must have known what he was doing to her. He must have known how her heart kicked into gear at comments like that, but he seemed so impassive to it. If he was aware of the way her heart pounded or how her knees wobbled like she was fifteen again, then he didn’t let on to it.

A short silence passed between them. Katie could hear Rover on the other side of her door, sniffing at the door sweep and waiting for her to come in. He was probably expecting a treat by now, but also to be let out so he could go to the bathroom.

“Hey, Katie…” Lance began, his hands stuffing into his pockets to rattle at his keys mindlessly.

“Hmm…?”

“I just want you to know…” The brunette paused, shifting and searching for words to put this in the way he wanted. “Tonight… What we did? It uh…”

Katie felt something settle funny in her chest at his words.

It what? Didn’t mean anything? Didn’t count? Was he regretting what they did? Or had she rushed this too fast herself, and now he was thinking about where this would lead them?

“It’s not like that’s a normal thing for me on dates, uh, _ever_.” He told her, looking up in an almost timid fashion. It would be such for him. “Like, I don’t want you thinking that this is all I’m looking for from you, because it’s not. That’s not what I do on a first date. This was just kind of… A spur of the moment?”

That was probably the best way to put it. She didn’t even know what to call it herself. 

“The point is, is that I really like you, and I hope you don’t think that I’m just trying to hook up with you or anything like that, because I’m not.”

It was safe to say that Katie found this shy, worried side of Lance cute. She always had, but Lance was more suave and debonair when she first knew him. When they first got together, some of that had faltered, and after a while, that cocky side of him mellowed out (she had always said that had been her fault). He had his moments, just like he did now, but he was never quite as jittery as this Lance was.

It was still cute.

“I don’t…” She said with a smile, her hand lifting to brush her fingers against his cheek.

Lance had been so worried she would have thought poorly of him. Meanwhile she had been so concerned about making a good impression to keep him at her side that it seemed to balance out.

They were both still hopeless at the end of it all.

Katie stood on her tip toes, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips before leaning back to look at him.

“Good night, Lance.” She spoke softly, turning away to unlock her door, leaving him a blushing mess. The door opened, and Rover’s head was the first thing to peek through at her, immediately sniffling her legs to take in all of the different smells.

“Y-Yeah… See you tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow,” She assured. Lance rubbed at the back of his neck, his cheeks pulled apart in such a genuine smile that she almost told him to just come inside. He didn’t need to go home, but that would be pushing it too far for a first date.

Even if and when their _first_ date didn’t really follow usual first date rules.

Katie finally went inside, watching as Lance walked down the hall before shutting her door and leaning against it. All alone with Rover, the brunette slid to the floor, the green lion pressed so tightly to her chest that it ruffled up her fur.

The Jindo sniffed about her wildly, noticing peculiar scents not normally on her, including Lance’s own. He was still waiting for his treats and his walk, but Katie was so far up in the clouds- No. In the _stars_ that she didn’t think she could come down.

She was weightless now, left to float through this blissful ignorance for as long as she possibly could.

This was the first time in this life that she could say she truly felt happy.

* * *

Walking into the coffee shop the next day felt surreal somehow, but it didn’t come without a price.

Shiro, Hunk and Keith were already sitting while Lance was barely seen in the kitchen. The minute she walked in, all of their eyes were on her, and Keith and Hunk were prepared.

“Here comes the bride,” Hunk began singing, but not so loud that Lance could hear them from the kitchen.

“Here comes the bride,” Keith joined in, causing the older man across from them to laugh at their antics.

“Oh ha ha, very funny.” The brunette reprimanded them, rolling her eyes as she came to sit beside Shiro.

“We’re terribly sorry.” Keith began. “We’re just preparing ourselves for your wedding.”

“Stop,” Katie warned, but it wasn’t taken to heart.

“So, we’ve heard it from Lance.” Hunk said, leaning forward in his seat to interrogate her. “Now let’s hear all of the juicy details from you.”

“There aren’t any juicy details,” She told them.

“Oh come on! Lance told us everything.” Hunk said.

Katie glanced back into the kitchen, seeing his brown hair whisk around the back from the window. He was probably cleaning, because Lance was neurotically clean and organized. It was probably what kept her half as organized after they got together.

Why would he tell them about last night? Sure, he could talk about the fair, but about the kissing? That was kind of personal. Even before he hadn’t been one to kiss and tell, so why do it now?

“We just… Kissed a little bit.” She explained, completely taken aback by both Keith and Hunk gasping.

“You two made out?” Keith gaped at her.

“What…?” She asked, looking to Hunk. “I thought you said Lance told you everything!”

“No he didn’t,” Hunk said, leaning back with a smug grin. “You just did.”

Of course he did that.

“Hunk!” She exclaimed, feeling her face flush with color at the sudden realization that she had been fooled into giving out personal information from their date.

“What did I miss?” Lance had come out of the kitchen only a few seconds before with a tray of fresh coffee’s and a hot chocolate in his hands, but he hadn’t heard what they had been talking about.

“Oh, just hearing about your little make out session yesterday.” Hunk mused, looking back at the taller teen with the smug look still intact. Keith puckered up his lips against his hand and smacked them together while Shiro covered his mouth, hiding his laughter.

“You told them?” Lance asked, looking to her.

“He told me you told them!” Katie said, pointing to Hunk.

“Uh, the court needs evidence of this claim!” Hunk announced with a raised hand, looking about the empty room. “Judge, I need evidence to dispute this fact.”

Lance set down the tray, rolling up his sleeves with a wicked grin.

“You’re a little…” He began, but he couldn’t think of the right word to call him. So he didn’t say anything. Instead, he let Hunk stand up to put his fists up at him, stepping back and forth on his feet quickly.

“Careful, you two. I don’t want anything to break.” Shiro warned them, reaching past Katie to get his coffee.

“We’ll be fine, dad.” Lance remarked before charging, wrapping his arms around Hunk’s waist. It didn’t nothing to the bigger man besides make him cackle.

“I meant the shop.” Shiro corrected their train of thought, but it was too late. The two of them were in their little match of wits, barely making any moves besides throwing arms over one another in a head lock.

“If you guys make a mess in my nice, clean shop, I’ll gut you both.” Keith threatened, his arms crossing in annoyance. He had just gotten this place spotless too.

Katie watched all of them fondly, feeling a tightness in her chest. It wasn’t her normal anxiety, but there was a pain to it she wasn’t used to. An ache for her family, and for her home. Something so familiar and warm that she wasn’t aware of the tears sliding down her cheeks until Keith saw it.

“What’s wrong, Katie?” He asked with a frown, leaning forward in his booth. Shiro looked away from his coffee and to her just as the words stopped Lance and Hunk’s playful brawl.

Katie’s reached up to wipe at her eyes, feeling the tears coming despite trying so hard to hold back, but it was no use. The dam had broken, letting out the tears she’d been fighting back for so long.

“Katie…” Hunk said her name as Lance kneeled down beside her chair.

“What’s wrong?” He asked her, setting a hand down the small of her back for a form of comfort.

“N-Nothings wrong…” She uttered with a sniffle.

“Clearly something is wrong, Katie.” Shiro said, resting a hand on her shoulder. “Whatever it is, you know you can talk to us.”

“I know,” That she definitely knew. She had a good family around her. “But really. Nothing is wrong.”

“Then why are you crying?” Lance asked her, pressing his other hand into her knee.

“… C-Cause I’m happy,” She admitted, laughing a bit at how silly she felt for crying when she was happy, but she couldn’t seem to stop, even if she wanted to, and she really wanted to. “I’m really happy…”

None of them looked like they believed her in the least bit, but they didn’t have to. They would never know how much a moment like this meant to her, and that was okay. Everyone was alive, safe, healthy, and living a good life. The lives they all deserved, and this moment right here made her so incredibly happy.

Katie turned her body, catching Lance off guard when she wrapped her arms around his shoulders. Her face pressed into his neck, taking in his sweet smell between heavy gasps of air. He smelled a lot like coffee, but she could smell something acidic like floor cleaner from when he’d been tidying up.

It was far better in comparison to the smell of burnt metal that used to be his armor.

It took a second for the shock to wear off, but Lance’s hands wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer to help her settle down.

Moments like this were too precious to let go to waste.

“I think Katie needs a big group hug.” Hunk told everyone, making the smallest of them giggle against Lance’s shoulder.

Lance stood up, pulling her up and against him so everyone could join in. Shiro grouped up with them first, wrapping his arms around the two younger adults with a smile. Keith wiggled his way in, keeping his arms mostly around Katie and Shiro while his hands brushed against Lance’s back.

Hunk was the last one, and for good reason. Once he got his chance to join in, his big arms wrapped around all four of them, and he used his impressive strength to squeeze them into grunts, groans, and laughter.

“Hunk, you’re killing us!” Lance exclaimed, feeling Katie giggle through her heavy breathing.

“I’m killing you with my love,” He told them all, eliciting another laugh respectfully from everyone.

The tears were still there, and Katie was both annoyed with that and relieved. She couldn’t stop them, but she was completely content keeping her head against Lance’s chest as the four of them were squished in a heap of arms and chests.

She had her family again, and she couldn’t have asked for anything more.

* * *

_Pidge’s eyes were wide, peering out of the viewfinder of her lion in apprehension._

_“That’s… A lot of Galra…” Hunk’s voice was static in her ears through the communications com as the teens looked at the fleets of Galra battle cruisers and ships staring at them head on._

_“Guys, keep your heads in the game!” Shiro’s voice was as anxious as they all felt, piloting the black lion to fly ahead of them. “We’re in for the fight of our lives!”_

_“Matt, is your ship repaired yet?” Keith asked from where he was on the castle ship._

_“Just about!” Her brother’s reply was a quick as could be. “Just need to make sure the engine doesn’t explode again and we should be good!”_

_“Good, because we need all the help we can get.” Shiro took on a calmer voice. “Lance, get the king out of here. Make sure he gets back to his planet.”_

_“Roger that!” Lance replied. Pidge watched as the red lion disappeared from her sight, her heart suddenly jumping into her throat._

_She had a horrible feeling in the pit of her stomach. Something was wrong, but she didn’t know what, but seeing Lance fly off in his lion had her breathing heavy._

_“Be careful, Lance…” She said in a separate channel. She needed to keep her head in the game, just as Shiro said, but that didn’t mean that she needed to make everyone worried._

_“Don’t worry, Pidge, I’ve got this.” He assured her. “I’m your Lancey Lance after all.”_

_“Right…” The air she let out would have been a laugh, but his assurance didn’t make her feel any better. If anything, it made her feel worse._

_“You just watch yourself. I’ll see you back at the castle for dinner, alright?”_

_Pidge jumped at the sound of Shiro’s voice yelling back at her. Her eyes had been so trained on watching Lance disappear that she didn’t see the oncoming swam of cruisers poised to shoot at her. His warning had been enough to snap her out of it and move out of the way just in time._

_“Careful, Pidge!” Allura’s warning came from the blue lion and she flew by._

_“Allura, look out!” Hunk yelled at her._

_Pidge’s canon managed at the fighter that aimed to run into her, saving the princess when she hadn’t been paying attention. She had been so concerned for Pidge when she wasn’t moving that she hadn’t noticed her own problems flying straight towards her._

_“There’s too many of them!” Pidge cried out, narrowly avoiding a blast from a Galra fighter. “We need to form Voltron!”_

_“We can’t without Lance! He has to take the king back!” Hunk reminded her. Of course she knew that, but she would have felt better at least knowing that Lance was with her. Then she would know that they were all together, and that everyone was alive._

_“At this rate though we aren’t going to make it!” Allura told them._

_“Our ship is good!” Matt’s voice rang through. “Keith and I are coming as fast as we can!”_

_“Shiro, what do we do?” Allura asked. The coms went quiet for a second, knowing that Shiro was thinking of their next five steps, not just the first one._

_“Pidge is right. We can’t do this without Voltron.” His voice came through, and with it a certain relief. “Lance, where are you?”_

_“I’m just about to enter the planet’s orbit!” His voice broken through the static of the communications com, heavy and panicked. “I’ve got Galra on my tail though!”_

_“Shake them off and get back to us!” Shiro told him, his lion flying past three cruisers with its jaw blade out to destroy them. “We need to form Voltron!”_

_“But what about-?”_

_“Lance, look out!” Keith’s voice was frantic and rushed, but his warning was too late._

_A beam projected from one of the battle ships, and in the distance, the four of them could see it aim at something. The static in their transmission grew impossibly worse as something in the distance exploded, a bright light blinding them._

_“Lance!” Matt’s voice cried out._

_Pidge’s heart stopped as she turned her lion, looking in the direction of scattered pieces of ships and cruisers. The green lion’s viewfinder zoomed in at two hundred percent, giving her the ability to see what it had been the ship had just shot at._

_She watched hopelessly as the red lion slowly drifted into the planet’s atmosphere, gravity carrying it down to the planet._

_“Lance!”_

* * *

Katie woke up with a start, panting, and covered in a fresh layer of sweat.

She couldn’t breathe, and in the dark, her eyes were unfocused, staring up at her glow-in-the-dark stars and swallowing hard.

“R-Rover!” She cried out, rolling onto her back to take the pressure off of her chest.

She barely heard the scurry of padded paws and long nails against the wooden flood in her living room before the animal appeared not a moment later, pushing his way through her door and into her room. The dog quickly jumped up on the bed, dropping down beside her and resting his head on her chest.

Katie reached for him, clinging to his small barreled chest for dear life. Tears were stinging her eyes as she gasped for air, trying her hardest to focus on everything around her.

Rover was there. His fur was soft. His snout was wet as he licked at her face. He was trying to calm her down.

She could hear her breathing. She could hear _him_ breathing. She could feel her duvet against her, damp with her sweat, and could feel the weight against her chest when Rover set his paws over it.

_One, two, three…_

Katie took in a shuddering, deep breath, and let it out slowly.

_Four, five, six…_

She blinked back the burn in her eyes.

“… T-Thank you, Rover…” Her voice was shaking as much as she was physically, pulling the dog against herself to keep herself grounded. The dog, of course, did not respond, instead licking at her arm in a silent form of comfort.

Her hands ran over his back, feeling the bumps of his spine and the dense patch of fur along his tail bone.

She had used this method before. She’d done this multiple times in her life, and knew she would continue to ground herself throughout it. Rover just happened to be the upside, always knowing that she needed something to hold onto when this anxiety struck her and being there when she needed it.

She couldn’t ever be alone when she was like this. It was far worse hell to be in by herself then when she had someone with her, and Rover was far more commendable than any human.

Katie shifted, feeling disgusted by how wet her back was as she looked around her room. The glowing neon numbers on her alarm clock red one thirty-two in the morning. Far too late to be up, but far too early to be doing anything.

Here she was, at one thirty in the morning, clinging to her dog and counting in her head, dispelling the last of her attack.

The memories were still so fresh in her head, just like the day they happened. It was hard living her life now as a normal human being when she was plagued by these thoughts. Plagued by the days she couldn’t live in anymore. Haunted by the memories of Lance’s death.

_Lance._

Katie rolled onto her side, reaching for her phone blindly in the dark. She felt the cord of her charger and pulled, yanking it back until her phone was in her hands.

Her phone lit up, momentarily blinding her to the screen for a few minutes before her eyes could adjust. Rover, in the meantime, put his nose against her neck, panting against her skin.

Katie went looking through her recent messages until she came across Lance’s name in her phone. The last one that had been sent had been from two weeks ago (they didn’t text each other often), when Lance told her he was on his way to pick her up for their date.

He wouldn’t be up this late, would he? No, he couldn’t be. Lance was a man of beauty sleep to keep himself looking fresh and healthy, so why would he be awake?

She sighed as she began typing out a new message.

_”You aren’t by any wild chance awake, are you?”_

_-Sent_

Katie leaned back into her pillows, counting in her head again from where she left off.

_Seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty…_

Her phone buzzed in her hand, surprising her. She was almost skeptical, like it wasn’t who she knew it was replying, and yet she expected someone else.

_Lance_

_1:35 a.m._

_“Unfortunately yes. I’m studying for this crap tomorrow afternoon.”_

_-Image sent_

Katie looked at what was a picture of his computer screen, listed with a bunch of calculations her brain really couldn’t comprehend at the moment, even when she knew the answers.

Her phone buzzed in her hand again.

_Lance_

_1:36 a.m._

_“But the real question is: What are you doing awake?”_

Katie could practically hear his sarcastic tone through the text itself.

_“I had a nightmare. Just kind of need something to distract me for a bit, I guess…”_

_-Sent_

Katie yawned into her palm, making Rover lift his head. She smiled at the Jindo, taking in his big eyes in the dark and thinking that maybe he looked like he was smiling.

“You’re a good boy,” She said, ruffling the fur between his pointy ears before her phone went off. It went off again, and two more times until she realized that it wasn’t a text message. Looking at her could only confirm that as a truth when she saw Lance’s name flashing across the screen with his number under it.

He was calling her.

She actually debated answering it. She still wasn’t completely steady, her voice still shaking whenever she spoke. However, there was something warm bubbling in her stomach at the thought that he was calling her at such a late hour.

He was _worried._

“Hello…?” Katie pulled the phone to her ear, her voice cracking from the lack of use.

 _“You called for a distraction?”_ Lance’s voice was dripping with sleepy sarcasm, the sound of his fingers hitting a keyboard in the background as he worked.

“Actually _you_ called for a distraction.” She retorted, rolling onto her back again to look up at her ceiling.

 _“I can’t argue that.”_ He chuckled lightly, and she could hear him yawn. She couldn’t help but laugh as well. _“So… Do you want to talk about it? The nightmare, I mean.”_

Katie took in a deep breath, letting it out slowly.

“It was… A weird dream,” She began. No one said she couldn’t ever pass off her dreams to someone else. “Like, it was all of us from the café, and we were all in outer space in this big ship.” She told him. His fingers brushed against the fur of her stuffed lion, unconsciously grabbing it to bring it to her chest. Lance wasn’t there in person, but this helped, and so did Rover.

“But whatever the mission was we were on went bad, and…” She took another deep breath and counted. “A-And you died.”

Lance was quiet for a moment longer than she thought he should have been.

 _“Well that’s a hell of a dream.”_ He finally said.

“It’s one of those kinds of dreams that just… Sits with you.” She explained sheepishly.

 _“Do you… Want me to come over?”_ He asked her, his voice soft, but cautious. _“If you need someone to be there with you…”_

“No, it’s okay.” Katie smiled, no longer feeling a sense of dread. “I’ve got Rover here. Besides, it’s too late for you to be walking around in the cold.”

_“That wouldn’t bother me, so long as I know you’re okay. Even if I have to walk miles in three feet deep snow.”_

_“So long as I know you’re okay…”_ The words were ringing in her head.

Katie felt like her cheeks were hurting from the smile on her lips.

“It’s really alright. Just hearing you on the phone is enough.” She told him, mindlessly petting Rover’s paw that laid across her chest.

 _“Alright…”_ Lance sounded skeptical. _“You would tell me if you needed me though, right?”_

“Absolutely…”

_“Do you still have the stuffed lion I got for you?”_

“Mhm. I’m holding her right now.” She squeezed the green lion for emphasis he wouldn’t see.

 _“Okay, good.”_ He sounded reassured. _“You can just hold onto her.”_

“Yeah…” She sighed. “Hey Lance…?”

_“Hmm?”_

“Would you stay on the phone with me?” She asked him. “Just until I start getting tired?”

Which was already happening. Listening to Lance’s soothing voice had already calmed her nerves, helping to make her eyes heavy with sleep.

 _“Of course…”_ He told her. _“I can just sit here and spout calculous at you. That should knock you right out.”_

“That’ll do it.” She breathed out a laugh.

 _“It’s not all too bad, I guess. While I’m studying I’ve got a face mask on, so I’ve got that much going for me.”_ He explained. _“My problem is that I was falling asleep with it on, so I’m getting crumbly green stuff all over myself.”_

“That sounds like a personal problem.” She mumbled, and this time the sleep was evident in her voice.

_“Are you falling asleep already…?”_

“… No.” She replied with much too long of a pause, her eyes forcing themselves to stay open. Lance chuckled.

_“Go back to bed, Katie. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”_

“Alright…”

_“If you can’t sleep, or something happens, just call me again, okay? I’m right here if you need me.”_

Katie smiled despite how tired she now felt.

“Alright, I will…”

_“Okay. Goodnight, Katie.”_

“Hey Lance.” She stopped him before he could hang up.

_“Yeah?”_

“The answer to number thirty four is n equals 15.” She told him.

There was a long pause, presumably his tired brain trying to figure out what she meant by that before the pieces clicked into place. He practically groaned over the line as realization hit him, and she could hear him rubbing at his face with relief, probably ruining his face mask.

 _“Man, I freaking love you, Katie.”_ He told her, his voice muffled by his hands.

Katie giggled softly before ending the call, letting the screen go black as she locked her phone. She felt all warm and fuzzy now, her mind buzzing despite how exhausted she was. She couldn’t even wipe the smile off of her face as his words danced around in her head.

_“I freaking love you, Katie…”_

She felt pretty confident that she wasn’t going to have any more nightmares tonight.

“I love you too…” She whispered to no one but herself, rolling back onto her side to hug Rover against her chest.

* * *

October was gone before she could blink, and November was coming to an end. Snow was already covering the town in a blanket, closing some schools, making people late for work, and Thanksgiving was only a few days away.

With that thought came dread. Knowing she’d get to see Matt was great, because it had been a few months since she had last seen him, but this meant sitting down at a table with her parents.

They were expecting stories. They were expecting updates on her life, and it wasn’t like she was going to tell them about Lance. They’d want to know him, know his name and what he does, and possibly invite him over sometime. She couldn’t possibly do that, because they knew who Lance was.

They knew Lance McClain, the man she once loved from her stories. If they heard she was dating someone named Lance now, they’d lose it. They’d be livid, thinking she was chasing after fantasies in the form of someone who happened to have the name Lance McClain.

If only they knew.

What’s worse; she never told Matt that she was dating anyone. He wasn’t the least of her concerns, but he’d go into big brother mod and interrogate Lance from where he lived by stalking him over the internet, just to make sure he was a sane and fit person to be with his baby sister.

It wasn’t like she wanted to hide any of this. She wanted to tell them she was dating. She wanted to tell them that she was hopelessly in love, only to hope they’d be happy for her, but she couldn’t. That was a dream long since destroyed when she was a child, and she knew it. She knew exactly what would happen, so she couldn’t tell them.

Katie figured that it’d be hard not telling them about him, but it’d be worse suffering the consequences if she did.

It was hard to swallow, but she reprimanded herself on the thought as she walked into the small café, ready to sit down with her friends, have a cup of stale coffee, and joke about their day’s adventures.

Or so she would have hoped.

This was honestly the busiest she had ever seen the little shop in almost three years now. She wasn’t used to walking in and seeing Keith and Lance doing their jobs, taking orders and handing them out. She wasn’t used to seeing Hunk in the kitchen rushing about, and she wasn’t used to seeing Shiro sitting along, eating a freshly made pastry.

“Hey,” She spoke up so as not to spook him as she sat down beside him.

“Evening, Katie.” He greeted. At least he was still exhausted. That hadn’t changed.

“Why is it so busy?” She asked with a frown, taking Shiro’s drink from him before he could reach for it. A very typical thing of her to do.

“Hunk brought out these new little chocolate stuffed cinnamon rolls.” Shiro said, holding the treat up for emphasis.

“Leave it to Hunk to get this place booming.” She retorted, looking around at the few tables nearby who had more than two people in each.

“Here, try it.” Shiro said, holding up one that he hadn’t bitten into yet. Katie took it for him and bit down, and instantly she felt her taste buds explode from the wonderful flavors.

“I see the fuss.” She muttered between bites.

“Hunk has gone and done it again.” Shiro said, picking up the one he had been working on and taking a bite out of it.

“Hey Katie,” Lance came up to their table and greeted them, or more so her. He already said hi to Shiro.

“Hey Lance,” She replied, sitting up slightly to reach him while he bent down for a kiss.

“Uh, I don’t think I’m going to be able to sit down tonight.” He told her with a frown.

“It’s okay, Lance.” She assured him. “I can tell you’re swamped.”

“That doesn’t even begin to describe how it’s been today.” He said, setting down a cup of hot chocolate for her. This had become the norm for them.

“Thanks,” She said as he wandered off. She watched him for a couple of mindful minutes, watching him work and cleaning up as people slowly flooded out. After the few months they had known each other, she should have been accustomed to seeing some of the girls bat their eyes at him, or how he’d offer up a sweet smile while he talked to them. He never reciprocated their flirting, but even then, Katie felt a sense of jealousy at what they were doing.

She could tell herself to take a breath and calm down all she wanted, but that didn’t help. Even when she knew he wasn’t the type of guy to fool around with other girls while he was with someone, it still got on her nerves.

“Don’t drill holes into their heads too much, Katie.” Shiro said after a while, noticing the way she practically glared daggers at some of the girls Lance talked too.

“I’m hoping they explode…” She muttered, distracting herself with sipping on her hot chocolate.

“I didn’t think you’d be the jealous type.” Shiro observed.

“I’m not jealous.” Shiro’s expression fell into something similar to disbelief. “I’m not!”

“Katie,” He said her name in a reprimanding manner.

“You know what?” She scoffed as she stood up. “I just remembered I have a paper due.”

“Getting out of here so I don’t prove you wrong?”

Katie rolled her eyes, but otherwise ignored him. She shucked her backpack on quickly, the last of her hot chocolate ignored like it normally was and headed for the front door. She would have gotten outside had it not been for Lance catching her arm.

“Wait, Katie,” He said as she turned to look at him. “You’re leaving already?”

“Yeah, I have a paper due tomorrow.” Which was a total lie, but she really didn’t want to let Lance in on the real reason as to why she was leaving.

“Uh, well could you hang back for a few minutes while I finish with this table?” He asked of her, and his expression was oddly downtrodden. “I have to talk to you.”

“Oh…” She uttered, feeling something very off from his expression. “Sure…”

Lance let go of her hand with a timid smile, turning away to go back to one of the few tables still full and make sure everything was okay.

Katie’s heart was pounding in her chest, but there was just something about the way he looked at her that didn’t seem right. What was it he could have needed to talk about? Was he upset about something? Was he sick?

 _Oh god._ What if he wanted to break up with her?

They’d been together officially for a little over a month now, but she couldn’t possibly imagine this ending. She was still so hopelessly in love with him, more then he could ever realize. After their first date, she’d forgotten what could happen if he wanted to end it, so she foolishly let herself believe it never would.

If it did? She wasn’t sure she could handle it.

Katie waited by the door impatiently, shifting her weight from the heels of her feet to her toes, giving her something to do to keep herself distracted. Looking at her phone only did so much, and she had long since gotten bored of her games.

No new text messages or emails, and nothing new on any social media sites.

Great.

“Okay,” Lance finally came back to her after he managed to calm the rush to a certain degree. “Are you okay to talk outside?”

“Uh, sure.” She agreed, but reluctantly. Outside meant where no one could hear them, or her if she burst out into a fit of crying, which she couldn’t promise even to herself that she wouldn’t do. Outside meant the cold could numb out the pain, if only hopefully. “So… What’s wrong?” She asked him as they came to stand by the brick wall, where the windows weren’t, and where people couldn’t see them.

Lance looked at her, his blue eyes speaking nothing to what he was actually thinking. With his hands in his pockets, he seemed so standoffish, making it hard for her to breathe.

Katie looked away, rubbing at her arm as the cold crept into her bones.

Before she could ask again what was wrong or what it was Lance needed to talk to her about, the taller man moved forward, one of his hands catching her waist while the other cupped her cheek. She gasped at the movement, but it was muffled by his lips as he kissed her. The suddenness of it had her falling back, pushing into the wall behind them to be trapped as his lips kissed her with all of the intensity behind it, just like when they kissed on their first date.

Katie was no less than shocked, but she managed to get herself together quickly, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and keeping herself up and pressed against him. It was no less than ideal to be doing this in public where anyone could see them, or where any of the customers could walk out of the coffee shop at any moment, but she was so far gone into the kiss that she didn’t care.

Lance’s hands were warm from work, running up her side and down her neck, giving her goosebumps while one of his knees rested between her legs, keeping her up. Her legs felt like jello, and if he hadn’t been holding her, she probably would have fallen over.

“L-Lance…” She breathed against his lips, panting, because he took her breath away without even trying.

Lance’s lips trailed across her cheek, pressing into the lob of her ear before whispering.

“I heard you talking to Shiro,” Katie shivered at the warm breath fanning against her skin. “Don’t be jealous, Katie. I’m all yours…”

The brunette’s knees shivered at the tone of his voice, her nails scratching into the back of his neck lightly to keep a hold of reality.

“Y-You should prove it to me…” She uttered, feeling a heat burning in her stomach. Her cheeks definitely lit up at her words, because not once in either of her lives had she ever been that bold, but she couldn’t stop herself.

If Lance was hers, he needed to make it known, and the chuckle by her ear sounded all too agreeing.

“If I wasn’t still working…” Lance’s lips traveled again, moving behind her ear and down over parts of herself she had forgotten were so sensitive. “I’d be more than happy to show you.”

“I guess… Hunk and Keith wouldn’t let you leave early, huh?”

“Not with this rush.” Lance leaned back, pressing his forehead into hers to look into her brassy eyes. “What are you doing tomorrow?”

“Uh…” Wait, what was she doing? Her brain was not with her at the moment. “A-An early class in the morning, and that’s it. Most of my classes are done for the break.”

“Perfect,” She was pretty sure he just purred. “I have one final exam for the semester and I’m done. How about we have the whole day planned out afterwards? Just the two of us?”

“Sounds wonderful…” She beamed, melting into his arms that settled low on her hips.

“Good.” He pressed a kiss into her nose. “I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

* * *

Katie more or less couldn’t focus to save her life.

She couldn’t keep her attention straight for five minutes to listen to her lecture let alone remember what it was about. Probably something to do with her test coming up.

What class had she just walked out of again?

Honestly, it was almost ridiculous that she couldn’t keep her thoughts in line. All she could think about was Lance, and how they’d agreed go to lunch at twelve, and after that an early afternoon movie. They talked about going to the mall possibly to kill a little time, and then afterwards?

Her breath caught in her throat.

If all went well, afterwards they’d go back to her place to make due on Lance’s promise from last night.

The thought made her shiver.

It had been too long since she’d had Lance’s hands all over her. While she’d waited for twenty two years to find him again, she couldn’t say she had experience. She was by no means a virgin, but this body was, and she’d kept it that way on purpose. Her first kiss in both of her lives had been from Lance, and now he was going to be the only person to own both of her bodies.

She couldn’t wait. The very idea of it made her burn and ache for him. She was ready for this, but she had to remember to take it slow. Lance still didn’t remember her, and as such, she couldn’t expect him to understand how much she wanted this.

After that kiss last night, she could easily assume he was right about there with her.

She still had an hour and a half before she needed to head back home, and going home early only meant more distractions, so she went to the library. The quiet would hopefully sooth her mind and get her thinking back on logical things, to help her study for her upcoming finals.

She settled herself further to the back of the library, taking a seat at a relatively empty table, minus a few boys on the end who were entertaining themselves with _other_ reading materials. She sat quietly, opening up her book and focusing solely on the words in front of her.

This lasted for all of about two minutes. The first problem came when she realized she’d lost her train of thought, and had to read the page all over again. Where she lost it she wasn’t sure, but she was sure it was somewhere near the top. This went on for a couple of more minutes, consistently reading one paragraph and thinking about tonight with anticipation.

The second problem came from a piece balled up paper hitting the side of her face.

She sighed.

This had been a constant through her life. The bullying and name calling never stopped, even now that she was in college, but she just had to wonder if these men had anything better to do than annoy her.

Another wad of paper hit her, followed by immature snickering. She was prone to this by now, but she had been quite content in her own little world thinking of Lance.

Focus on the book. Focus on the words. Focus on-

Another wad of paper. This time wet with god knows what. She definitely didn’t want to.

She grunted as she flicked away the offending piece of paper, prepared to get up and leave (Possibly submit a random claim that some gentlemen were openly reading porn in the library to the librarian) before hands covered her eyes.

“Guess who this is.” A voice spoke softly into her ear. She hummed.

“The spawn of Satan?” She asked, reaching up to feel Lance’s warm hands against her skin.

“Ohh, so close, but it’s just Satan.” He corrected her before uncovering her eyes.

“My apologies,” She retorted, looking up at him, noticing his blue hat and scarf, his cheeks, nose, and ears pink from the cold outside.

“Wanna take a guess at what’s behind my back?” He asked her.

“Satan’s polaroid’s?” She suggested. Lance snickered into his scarf.

“Close,” He said just before pulling out a single daffodil from behind his back.

“Damn, I was really hoping it was polaroid’s.” She uttered with a chuckle, taking up the flower with a brilliant smile. “It’s beautiful, Lance.”

“I’m glad you like it.” Lance said as he took a seat beside her.

“How did you manage to find a flower like this so close to winter?”

“I have connections,” The brunette waved her off as he pulled his chair close.

“What are you doing here anyway?” She asked him. “I thought you had a test today.”

“I did, but I finished a lot faster than I thought I would.” He told her. “Which is why I’m here now. I thought about going home and working on my story, but I figured we could be spontaneous and cause trouble before lunch instead. What do you say?”

“I’m down,” Katie agreed, closing up her book to put it away. Spending the whole day with Lance sounded great. “You’re writing a story?”

“Uh, whoops.” He laughed softly as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Cats out of the bag.”

“What’s it about?” She asked him as she tossed her jacket back on and zipped it up.

“It’s a bit of a long story. Kind of hard to explain in one sitting.” He explained. Something told her that it wasn’t something he was ready to divulge in yet, so she let it pass.

“When it’s done, do I get to read it?” She questioned, looking up at him with her big, brassy eyes and a jutting bottom lip. The perfect example of a pouting child, if it could be put to words.

He couldn’t resist.

“When it’s done,” He assured her. “You’ll be the first to read it,” And he sealed the deal with a kiss against her cheek.

Katie grinned at him, her cheeks a lovely shade of pink as she pulled her backpack on, mindful of the flower still in her hands. Once everything was put away and back into place, Lance put an arm around her shoulders, leading her out of the library.

Lance, however, even in this lifetime, still had good hearing, and couldn’t miss the carless comment tossed between the three guys sitting at the table she’d been in.

“Good. Get the nerd out of here.”

He stopped, turning away to look at them.

“Lance,” Katie said in a warning tone, pulling on his arm. “Come on. Let’s just go.”

She’d heard it too. It wasn’t like the guy was trying very hard to keep it quiet, but she knew what comments like that did to Lance. That hadn’t changed within this lifetime, and it wasn’t a good thing at all.

“No,” He said, pulling on his arm. “I’m sorry. Did you have something to say about my girlfriend?”

All at once the comment about her being his girlfriend made her heart sore while it jumped into her throat at him suddenly confronting them.

“Lance, they aren’t worth it.” She pleaded with him, tugging on his hand to bring him back. “I’m used to it, so can we just go?”

“No, Katie. You shouldn’t have to be used to this shit.” He yanked his hand from hers as the three other guys stood, the one who’d passed off his crude comment shoving his hands into his pockets. He wasn’t in the least bit concerned despite the head difference of height Lance had over him. “You want to repeat what you just said?”

“Uh yeah,” The guy, skinny, blonde man who looked to be just about Katie’s age walked up to him. Katie stepped back. “I believe I called her a nerd.”

“How old are you?” Lance asked in disgust. “Calling someone a nerd is something twelve year olds do. Are you so miserable with your life you have to put down others to make yourself feel better?”

“Maybe if she wasn’t such an easy target,” The guy scoffed. The anger emanating from Lance was more than frightful, but Katie couldn’t even stop him from suddenly shoving him back into the table.

“Lance!” She yelled at him, reaching for his arm to pull him away, but he was shoved back into her when the man pushed him back.

Before Katie could even realize what was happening, it was a fist fight. Even the two other men that had been with the blonde were trying to pull him back, but him and Lance were locked in on each other.

One bunch to the gut to the blonde man, but he managed a swift hit to Lance’s face when his guard was dropped. Lance staggered back while covering his face, his eye squinting shut at the pain. To this day Lance’s hand to hand combat skills weren’t that great, but that didn’t mean he didn’t know how to fight back.

The man threw another punch, but Lance narrowly avoided it, instead shoving his elbow into the guy’s stomach to knock the air out of him. He went tumbling to the floor where one of his friends got in between them, trying to stop Lance from landing anymore hits.

“Lance, stop!” Katie yelled at him, grabbing at his arm and yanking him back. “That’s enough! They’re going to call campus security on you!”

It was like he wasn’t listening, or rather, he was choosing not to. He tried pulling away so he could go after the guy again, who had crawled back to keep some space between them, but Katie didn’t let go. She wasn’t going to let him get in trouble like this.

“Lance, knock it off!” She barked at him. Lance finally turned to look at her, his eyes lit up with anger, though the one that had been hit was already swelling up.

“No Pidge! I’m not just going to sit around and let people bully you again!” He yanked again, this time freeing his hand.

She let it go with wide eyes.

“… W-What did you call me?” Katie asked, finding it hard to breathe. Lance’s breathing was strained, but he stopped for a moment to understand what she asked. A flicker of panic went across his face as he swallowed, realizing his slip up with anguish.

“… I-I called you Katie.” He excused, turning away.

The fight he’d been in had long since been forgotten about. The two friends had managed to convince the blonde man that this wasn’t worth it and promptly moved to pack up their things. They realized it was the better thing to do anyway; they were reading porn in a public place, and would have been asked to leave had they been caught.

“No you didn’t.” Katie argued, feeling something heavy weighing down her heart. “You called me…”

The realization hit her like a ton of bricks. Like someone had splashed cold water in her face.

The constant care. His over protective behavior. Always being there for someone he had hardly known in the beginning. Seeming to know everything about her, from how she thought to her likes and dislikes. He had never done well to hide his overbearing affections, because he _couldn’t._

“You remember…” She whispered, the words sitting on her tongue and making it hard to speak.

Lance looked away, his expression practically screaming guilty, because he had been caught. He knew he had been caught, and yet he didn’t say anything. He looked like a child that had been caught doing something they knew they shouldn’t have been doing, but did it anyway. He looked down at the floor, at the book shelves, and at the three men that scurried away as the librarian came over to find out all that had happened.

He looked at everything but her.

“Lance…” She spoke up, trying to bring his eyes to her. When it didn’t work, she spoke again. “Lance, look at me.”

He hesitated in doing so. He took a moment, and she almost said his name again before he finally did. His blue eyes were wide in an apologetic manner, the perfect picture of a child in trouble, but the look was destroyed by his slightly swollen eye.

“Do you remember?” She asked him, finding it so hard to keep her voice steady. She was blindsided by so many emotions; far too many to count even. For some reason, she was angry too, and she couldn’t place why.

Lance didn’t respond. He went back to looking away again like there was something far more entertaining than this conversation happening right now. He didn’t even have the decency to deny her, because he couldn’t.

She already had her answer, but she wanted to hear it.

“Lance.” His name came out stern, tired of the avoidance. “Do. You. Remember?”

Each word was practically a threat, a bite to her tone as she stepped forward, forcing his eyes back on her.

All he could do was look guilty. Guilty for lying, and guilty for having been caught.

“Tell me, Lance. Or…” She faltered. Whatever it was, it wasn’t good. “O-Or I’ll leave. I’ll leave, and you won’t see me ever again.”

Lance’s eyes widened in fear as he looked down at her, taking in the threat with a nauseous making feeling taking over.

She was being serious. His Pidge didn’t make threats like that as a joke, and it most definitely wasn’t a joke.

The thought of losing her again hurt. It was like a stab of fear to his heart, but he couldn’t possibly talk about it. He couldn’t. At least not now. Not here where people were blatantly staring at them.

He wanted to, but he couldn’t.

Seeing Katie’s eyes narrow at him in anger was a punch to the gut that hurt far worse than whatever her bully could ever do to him.

The growl that escaped her was more or less horrifying. _Pidge_ ever so rarely got angry at him. Annoyed, yes. Angry? No, never, and to be the target for her hostility was no less than terrifying.

What was worse, however, was her turning and running away from him.

“Pidge…!” He called after her.

She didn’t look back.

* * *

_Keith_

_8:45 p.m._

_“So you aren’t here and Lance called and said he couldn’t be in tomorrow. Should I assume this is something between you two?”_

_Hunk:_

_9:32 p.m._

_“Katie! I wanted to say hi yesterday, but it was so busy, and now you weren’t here today? Are you sick?”_

Katie had half of a mind to text them back and say they weren’t going to see her ever again, but that would be punishing them for something they weren’t involved with.

How could she possibly see them again when Lance worked with them? They were his friends too, and they deserved to see him just as much. No matter how much she hated it, she couldn’t be the bad guy and ask them never to see him again.

She wasn’t even entirely sure why she was acting like this. This had been what she wanted all along, wasn’t it? She had beautiful dreams about the day when Lance and their friends would remember everything, and then she could have her true family back with her. People who understood her. Who didn’t alienate her and think the worst of her for memories she couldn’t escape. This had been a literal dream come true.

So why was she so angry? Why was she so resentful?

Again the answer was staring her in the face. She just hated to admit that it existed.

It was because he remembered, but he never said anything. He remembered and went on with life like everything could be normal, but it couldn’t. Knowing that he remembered their past life and never doing anything about it absolutely killed her. It was almost like he was waving the acknowledgment in her face, and she hated it.

As much as she hated it, though, she couldn’t say the same for him.

She still loved him. This Lance and the previous one, because they were the same person. They had been the same person all along, and she hadn’t even noticed it. Maybe she was angrier at herself for not noticing the proof right in front of her face these past few months and thinking nothing of his strange actions, because honestly, what was she thinking?

Katie had dated a few times in the past. Mostly through high school, and those relationships never worked out. She was still weird to everyone. Her personal issues and clingy behavior turned off just about anyone who even looked at her in a certain way. She was the weirdo and the nerd for a reason.

People didn’t want someone with baggage. They didn’t want extra problems through high school when they had more pressing issues, like pimples and grades. She wasn’t wanted then, so why did she think so differently now?

_Because it’s Lance._

It’s Lance. The guy who flirted with every girl with bigger boobs and a beautiful face. The guy who had horrible pickup lines. The guy who oddly enough reminded her of Matt, which, if she thought about it enough, was why she liked him so much.

The guy who grew up too fast with too many responsibilities that a seventeen year old shouldn’t carry. A guy who matured into a strong man with proper morals. Who, even after all that, still told horrible jokes and flirted, but after a while, some of that flirting was directed to her.

Lance’s full blown crush on Allura had grown to be more respectful, while his eyes settled on someone he never thought a possibility, but it all made sense, because she wasn’t like other girls, and she never tried to be. She was just herself. Her short, scrawny, pale skinned, allergy infested, cropped haired, flat chested, fifteen year old self.

It was Lance. The guy who became a home so far away from home. Who held her on nights when Matt wasn’t there, telling her she’d get to see her mother again, after finding her father. That they’d be reunited, and life could go on. Promising her that she’d have a normal life someday.

The guy who knew all of her secrets, ones that the paladin’s (and the mice) didn’t know. Her deepest desires and wants.

The guy who broke down every wall, left her vulnerable, and stayed by her side anyway.

Katie had been so blindsided by love that she didn’t even realize that he was still doing it now. The only difference was that she had been broken long ago, before she was even born, and he was keeping her grounded to this day.

She hated it. She absolutely hated it, and him, because she had been such an idiot that she hadn’t seen it, and now she had put herself into this predicament, and she called it that, because she should have seen it coming. She was stuck, and she wasn’t even sure how to get out of this.

Another night home alone. It was late. Rover was sitting next to her on the couch, panting away as she mindlessly flipped through channels to find something to watch. Something to distract her mind.

Nothing good was ever on at eleven at night.

She turned her phone off to keep herself from doing something stupid. She even unplugged her laptop and let it die. What she needed was mind numbing television and her dog, because Rover really was the only guy who never judged her.

Well. She never heard it anyway.

Another night alone. Another horrible holiday coming up. At least now she had nothing to hide from her parents and Matt. She could simply say that she had been with someone and it didn’t work out. No names were needed, because they wouldn’t care for the person who didn’t matter in her life.

That one hurt to think about.

Lance mattered. He mattered more than she wanted him to, and it hurt.

Katie was startled from her deep, brooding thoughts at the sound of a knock on her door. Rover’s head lifted from her lap to look in its direction, a growl leaving him as she sat up.

Who in the hell was at her door at eleven at night?

Katie left the TV on, but went to the kitchen real quick for a knife. No one should have been at her door at eleven at night, and if someone tried to break in, she would be ready.

It wasn’t like Rover wouldn’t kill them himself. Anyone who ever came across wrong to him was on his bad side. God forbid they touched her.

Katie quietly walked to her door, knife still in hand. Another knock, this time a little louder to catch her attention, but a voice came out quietly from behind it.

“Pidge…?”

She froze.

_Lance._

Katie walked up to the door to look out of the peephole. Sure enough the taller man was standing outside her door, looking lost and broken. His eye was way more swollen, and after being untreated all day, it had bruised up badly.

It looked really painful.

Lance knocked on the door again.

“Pidge…?” He called out again, his face disappearing when he leaned his head into the door. “Please… Open up.”

Katie thought for a moment that she could open the door and smack it into his head. She was still a little spiteful, but she didn’t. She waited instead, listening to see if he had anything else to say. Anything wrong meant a door to the face though. She hadn’t given up this idea yet.

“I’m sorry…” His voice was a melancholy plea. “I really am…I should have told you, but I…” He sighed. “I just want to talk to you. Face to face…”

She didn’t say anything. She just listened.

“… You left your flower at the library…” He spoke up, and she could see him looking down. Probably at the flower. “It’s a little beat up, but if you get it in some water, it’ll still make it.”

Katie felt bad for the flower at least. She felt bad for Lance too, but she was far more concerned about the flower. She still wasn’t convinced to open this door yet.

Lance sighed again, finally leaning away. His disappeared from view for a moment before reappearing, looking far more downtrodden than before.

“It’s outside your door. Please, Pidge, just… Text me so I know you’re okay…”

Lance disappeared from sight, his footsteps softening until they were gone.

Katie found herself looking out of the peephole for a few moments after he was gone, wishing she had said something. She wasn’t ready to do anything yet though. She was still too angry, more so at herself than him really. She didn’t want to say anything stupid if she wanted to make this better.

Did she even want to make it better?

Katie took a deep breath as she slowly opened the door. The daffodil laid on the ground in a plastic wrap, and just like Lance had said, it was a little beaten up. One of the petals had snapped in half and some of the leaves had fallen off, presumably from when she tried to stop him from getting into a fight.

It could still make it. She just needed to get it in some water.

She bent down to pick it up, only for a hand to snatch up her wrist. Katie screeched, but was silenced as a hand covered her mouth, a body pushing her back inside.

“Pidge, shush!”

Lance kicked the door shut behind him as he kept a hand over her mouth, but he hadn’t taken Rover into account. When he heard his owner scream, Rover jumped off of the couch, barking up a storm as he raced towards them at lightning speed. Just the sight of the Jindo running to him had Lance jumping back in fear.

“Rover, stop!” Katie yelled at the dog when her mouth was released. Her dog did as told, but reluctantly, and still growling at Lance who was far too close to Katie for the dog’s liking.

“Holy shit…” Lance stammered, leaning against the closed door with wide eyes. He looked to Katie to say thanks, but his eyes caught sight of the knife in her hand first. “Why do you have a knife?”

“Hm, let’s see.” She began with a frown. “I’m a twenty-two year old female who lives alone, and there’s a nutcase knocking on my door at eleven at night!”

“Well how else was I supposed to talk to you?” Lance asked her, tossing his hands up in an exasperated motion. “You won’t answer your phone and you weren’t at the coffee shop! This was the only way I could get you to talk to me!”

“Some people would call this breaking and entering!” She bit out as she tossed the knife on the key stand by her door.

“Pidge, I just want to talk to you. Please let me talk to you.” He begged her. Katie huffed as she turned away, walking towards the kitchen with Rover close at her heel. The dog wasn’t going to give Lance any chance to get near her.

“I’m not ready to talk to you yet.” She bit out, flipping on the lights.

“When _are_ you going to be ready to talk to me?” He asked her as he walked to her kitchen.

“I don’t know,” She replied.

“I don’t know like within the next few days I don’t know? Or I don’t know if ever I don’t know?”

“I don’t know!” She snapped. “I’m pissed off enough as it is that you never bothered to tell me you remembered! You just abused that knowledge and kept it to yourself!”

“Hey, that wasn’t my fault!” He asserted. “And just for the record, you kept it from me too! You remembered everything and you didn’t say anything to me, so don’t put all of this on me, because you’re partly to blame!”

He was right. She knew he was right, but the idea of it still bothered her deeply.

Katie had kept it from him, but how was she supposed to tell him any of it? She had been an outcast enough as it was.

“How was I supposed to say anything?” She asked of him. “It’s bad enough I’m an outcast even to my parents! You think I wanted to lose you too?”

“Whatever argument you have is shit, Pidge, because guess what: I’ve been there! I had my fair share of my brothers and sisters calling me names while my parents sent me to therapy! I know what you’ve been through, because I’ve had to deal with that shit too!”

Again he was right.

Honestly, she had no valid arguments here. This was why she hadn’t wanted to talk to him just yet. She knew she was just as wrong as he was, but she wasn’t emotionally stable enough to talk it out calmly.

That was why the two of them were having this screaming match at eleven o’clock at night in the first place, with Rover growling at Lance’s feet, ready to bite if given any reason why. One false move and the dog would take his knee caps off, and Lance knew it.

Her eyes were already tearing up, ready to spill over, but she was too stubborn to let it out. She didn’t want to. Not right now and not in front of him.

“Pidge…” Lance said, his voice calmer, but still on edge as he reached out to touch her. Rover snapped at him, not to bite him, but as a warning, and Lance pulled his hand away. “Pidge, I love you. I’ve loved you all of my life, a-and when I saw you at the coffee shop, it took everything in me not to run up and hold you in my arms again. I couldn’t risk scaring you away.”

Katie bit back a sob.

“You mean the world to me, and I just… I figured that we could just start over again. We could live the life we fucking deserve. We deserve a chance at a normal life with a normal relationship, where we don’t have to stop in the middle of a video game to save the universe, or where we can sleep in instead of getting up early to train… I promised you that, didn’t I?”

Katie remembered it all too well. The multiple times where Lance had promised her that, once the war was over, they could live a normal life. Get a house together once they got older. Finish school and go to college. Get married. Have some kids. He promised it all.

She had thought of it too. The promise of a normal life with him.

Katie laughed bitterly.

“I should have known you were too good to be true.” She muttered, wiping at her eyes when tears dripped from her bottom lashes. “All the other guys I dated never gave me the time of day when I needed it, but you were always right there for me…”

“… You dated other guys?” He asked, sounding like someone had just stabbed him in the heart.

“I wanted to live a normal life.” She told him, sniffling. “I tried to move on… Clearly that didn’t work.”

Lance’s hand reached out again, but Rover didn’t growl. He seemed to sense the tension dissipating and allowed Lance to touch her, but the Jindo was still on guard.

“Maybe for a good reason.” He offered. Katie sighed, pulling her arm away from him and walking to her fridge. She opened up a freezer and took out an ice pack, bringing it back to lift it towards his eye.

“Twenty minutes on. Ten minutes off.” She muttered, slowly pressing it into his raised skin.

“Ouch,” He hissed, wincing in pain.

“At least agree you deserved to be hit.”

“So did he.”

“You were acting like a baby.”

“So was he.”

Ah, the mindless chatter. The way they could strike a conversation with no effort at all, and yet they never felt pressured to talk.

Just like how it had always been.

Katie rolled her eyes, barely suppressing the barest hint of a smile. Leave it to Lance to make her smile in any horrible situation.

She leaned into the counter beside him, holding the ice pack against his face gently so as not to do anymore damage. Something like this was going to stay bruised for the next week most likely.

Lance’s hand lifted to touch her, resting it over where she held the pack. He looked down at her with his unbeaten eye, a timid smile gracing his busted lip as he held her hand.

Unbeknownst to her, a tear managed to sneak past her bordered up walls, slipping down her cheek. Lance caught it quickly, wiping under her eye to stop more from coming.

“What’s wrong…?” He asked her.

Katie shook her head as more tears began to leave her. Any resolve she had left crumbled away as she leaned forward, kissing his tenderly, but carefully due to his spilt lip.

This didn’t stop her from crying. It only seemed to escalate it.

Her shoulders shook from trying to retrain it, her hands holding his cheeks, ice pack long since forgotten, and keeping him close. Lance’s own hands fell to her waist, pulling her as close as physical space would allow so he could kiss her like the world wasn’t asking something from them anymore, but it didn’t help.

She kept crying, whimpering against his lips between kisses and sobs with tears drenching her skin.

“Pidge, what’s wrong?” He asked her as he pulled away, reaching up to touch her damp cheeks.

“I-I love you…” She sobbed, their foreheads pressing together. “I love you so much, Lance. So much that it hurts, a-and I can’t breathe. I feel like I’m drowning sometimes when you aren’t around and it fucking hurts when you aren’t with me.”

Such an admission felt like years and years (quite literally) of weight dropping from her shoulders. She had never once said it to Lance in their previous life, and not once had she said it to him, at least not to his face.

Saying it now was a breath of fresh air. It was like someone took of weights from her body, making the shaking in her shoulders lessen with each passing breath. It was so much easier to breathe now, but she still had so much to get off of her chest.

“A-And I fucking hate myself for never telling you. I should have told you, because I did, Lance. I loved you so much, b-but I never got the chance… I never got the chance…”

Lance pulled on her shoulders, bringing her head down on his own shoulders to let her cry out her frustrations. He cradled her head close and slowly rocked back and forth, gently to help calm her down.

“I knew you loved me…” He whispered, running his fingers through her hair. “You didn’t have to say it, because I already knew.”

“You deserved to _hear_ it.” She cried, shaking with the heavy exertion it took to breathe properly.

“Maybe that was my penitence for never saying it to you properly.” He mumbled. Katie sniffled as she rubbed her eyes.

“When did you ever say it?”

“When you were asleep.” He mumbled leaning back to look at her. “Before I left to go back to my room, you know, _before_ Shiro caught us, I’d whisper it in your ear and hoped it helped you sleep through the night.”

“I remember Shiro catching us,” She mentioned, though she was taken by surprise to know that he had told her that he loved her long before his passing. “That was the worst morning ever.”

“Having him walk in on both of us in our naked glory in bed together? I considered it a miracle he didn’t tell Matt.”

“Matt would have killed you for that. That’s why.” She easily cautioned.

“I don’t doubt it.” Lance’s day was instantly brightened by the smile on her lips. While her eyes were still glistening with fresh tears and her face was red, just the smile alone proved that she was feeling better. “I was kind of waiting for Shiro to send me out of the airlock first.”

“He would have if you hadn’t been naked.” She mumbled. Lance sighed, stifling a laugh, but there was a pain in his eyes.

Or… _Eye_.

“This was not how I planned any of today to go.” He mentioned softly, his thumb rubbing over the back of her hand.

“You mean getting your ass handed to you wasn’t in today’s agenda?” She asked. Lance responded with a pout, or what seemed to be a pout. He couldn’t get his bottom lip out too far without it stinging.

“No,” He replied. “I had plans to take you out to this nice restaurant downtown that has some really good Italian food, and then the movies after that. Then I thought we could go for a walk in the park and see all of the Christmas lights they put up. Or go back to my place and play some videos games. I don’t know. Anything.”

Pidge smiled as she rubbed his cheek, feeling the soft skin beneath her thumb. She felt the muscles in his face twitch with a shy smile as he looked away, too embarrassed to look her in the eyes as he spoke. Just like when they first started dating.

“And then I thought… When we got back to my place, we could finally be together again.” He admitted, his cheeks darkening with a blush. Katie felt her face heat up at the admission, but she couldn’t say she hadn’t been thinking the same thing.

“We can still do one of those things on your list of plans tonight…” She concluded, her voice dropping into an almost soft whisper.

“I didn’t bring the video games with me.” He muttered, receiving a sharp jab into his side from the smaller woman. “Uh, ouch.”

“Serves you right…” She retorted, running her hand over where she punched him softly. “Really Lance… I-I want this…”

“Really…?” Lance leaned down to press his forehead into hers, sighing at the closeness. The comfort of simply being in her arms.

“Yes…” She whispered, feeling her heart beat pick up with anticipation. “It’s like… W-When you touch me, I don’t want you to stop…” Her explanation wasn’t the best to get her way of thinking across. There was so much more in her head that she had to tell him, but she couldn’t put the words together.

Katie’s hands ran up his chest, resting at his shoulders where her fingers gripped at his jacket. The touch of his hands on her waist felt nice, but it wasn’t enough. She needed his hands everywhere on her, touching barely skin. He was wearing way too much in her opinion, and all of this needed to be remedied immediately.

“W-We should uhm…” She paused to lick her lips, Lance’s eyes following the way her tongue peeked out. “We should… Maybe go back to my room… I-It’s a mess though.”

“I’d make a joke about that, but I don’t feel like getting hit again today…” He mumbled, mindlessly pushing his lips into her forehead.

“Good idea.” Katie pulled back, taking his hands from around her waist and holding onto them. They were still cold from being outside, and Lance felt so good letting her warm hands encase his own.

The smaller brunette led him out of the kitchen, passing Rover who had long since given up his threatening growls and went to bed. She took him down the short hallway to her room, letting the door shut behind them in an almost soundless manner.

Sure enough, her room was a mess. Just like she said it would be. There were dirty and clean clothes all over her floor, her books from school scattered from her desk to her bed, and even on her dresser, which had two open drawers. The only source of light was her bedside lamp, but she moved to turn it off, letting the room flood into darkness. The only light now was from the street lamp outside and her glow in the dark stars above her bed.

Katie looked back at her boyfriend through the dark, taking in the way he was silhouetted by the darkness, cracks of lighting shining on him through her blinds. It was so quiet now, all except for the TV in the living room still playing something, but she couldn’t remember what she had been watching.

“I-I guess I should… Uhm…” Katie stuttered as she looked down, reaching for the hem of her shirt. She went to pull it off, but stopped short when Lance’s hands grabbed hers.

“Wait, there’s no need to rush.” He told her, laughing slightly. Katie looked crestfallen at the thought. She wanted to do this, and she had thought he did too, so why was he making her wait? “We aren’t in a war anymore, Pidge. We have time _._ ”

 _Time_.

That was something they definitely had now, and that was something she could take for granted.

“Okay, but… You’re going to take your jacket off at least, right?” She offered, pressing her hands into the buttons of his coat.

“Oh, right…” He laughed at how weird it seemed to be still wearing his jacket, but he allowed her fingers to slowly pop the buttons of it open.

Her hands slid up his chest once it was open, pushing it off of his shoulders to let it join the mess on her floor. This left him in his jeans and a long sleeved shirt that showed off the definition in his upper body, because Lance was twenty three now, not seventeen years old. He had filled out and matured physically over the years, and she had no complaints.

Lance’s hand fell to her waist again, a touch so soft that it had goose bumps rise on her warm skin. She thanked the dark for being to cover up her blushing face, but she knew there was nothing she could hide from his sense of touch.

Katie’s hands lifted again, running up his neck slowly, feeling, seeing what she couldn’t see through touch and taking in the smallest of details. The fine hairs on the back of his neck stood on end as she ran her fingers up into his hair, pulling to bring him down to her height. He followed willingly, allowing their lips to brush and for their eyes to slip shut, lulled into a sense of security.

Of safety.

It was a slow, sensual kiss. The type of kiss they had shared often, but never lead to anything afterwards, probably because they didn’t allow it. It was a caress of lips and hands, tasting and touching, that led to the shyest parting of lips, and allowing tongues to brush together.

They sighed in unison, a slight rock in their stance as heads tilted and bodies pressed closer. Lance’s hands moved down to her hips, teasing at the hem of her shirt to feel the warm skin beneath it just above the waist band of her sleep shorts.

Their lips parted to breathe, their foreheads resting together. The slight rock continued as they stood there in silence, simply basking in each other’s presence. Just the knowledge that they were alive was enough to stop the world around them.

Lance was the first to move, pressing his lips into her cheek, caressing down her jaw. Katie tilted her head to the side, letting him do as he pleased as his lips pressed into her neck. The gentle caress was soothing, calming her nerves, but every small nip and suck sent a course of heat burning down from her finger tips to her toes.

He sucked hard on a patch of skin behind her ear, bruising the sensitive skin between his lips. Her nails raked across the back of his scalp.

It was a chain reaction. Each little motion brought on something new. Undiscovered territory, at least in this life.

She was sure he left a mark as Lance pulled back, his lips audibly plucking away to leave saliva in their wake. The sound made her whimper, her knees feeling weak under his touch. Lance wouldn’t have to do anything but this and she would be melting to the floor, but he had plans that didn’t involve just light touching and kissing.

Lance could leave as many marks on her as he wanted to. He could leave kiss stained bruises on every visible surface of her skin for the whole world to see, and she wouldn’t care. He belonged to her, and she belonged to him.

Case closed.

“Pidge…” Lance whispered with damp lips against her skin. The sensation made her shiver.

“K-Keep saying my name, Lance…” She begged of him, their hips pressing together. Lance chuckled by her ear, low and deep.

“You used to get a kick out of it when I called you Katie. Now you like it when I call you Pidge.” He teased, his fingers moving down to where her shorts met her thighs. They were sleep shorts meant for comfort. They weren’t tight and by no means did they cover what they needed to cover, but that was totally fine with him. As long as he was the only one who could see her in them.

“C-Cause it’s my name…” She whimpered, shaking as his fingers teased the edges of her shorts. “I miss it so much, a-and I miss hearing you say it.”

“I’ll say it a lot then…” He pressed a kiss into her ear, gently blowing into it that caused an eruption of shivers to blossom from her body. “All night long…”

Katie- No. _Pidge_ shook in his arms, feeling his fingers reach up into her shorts to feel her underwear.

“Y-You never dated anyone before me…?” She asked. Lance had to stop for a moment to stare at her questionably.

“No. Why?”

“Y-You’re a lot better at this than I remember you being.” It wasn’t intended to be an insult at his previous experience, but Lance definitely wasn’t this smooth their first time having sex.

“Don’t be jealous.” He told her, taking a step forward and coaxing her back towards the bed. Pidge felt the bed frame hit the backs of her knees, a cold shock compared to the heat she felt in her body.

Lance slowly led her down, letting her sit, readjust, and then scoot back as he sat over her on his knees. Their eyes didn’t separate for even a second as they moved to lay down. Lance laid over top of her, his hands on either side of her head to hold himself up while he knees rested against either side of his hips. It was such a vulnerable position, but it wasn’t something they hadn’t done before. In fact, there was a weird sense of normalcy with it.

“I waited all my life for you…” He murmured, looking down into her brassy eyes and caressing her cheek. “You were my first kiss again…”

“So were you…” She mumbled, tilting her head into his hand.

“You believe in destiny yet?” He asked with a good hearted chuckle. Pidge joined in, smiling to the point it almost hurt.

“I’m getting there…”

That was all he needed to hear.

Lance leaned down, pressing his weight into her body to kiss her. It wasn’t a gentle or soft kiss, but there was a fire within it. A heat when their tongues intermingled that drove on their actions. Pidge’s hands raked up his back and into his hair while his own trailed across her body, down her sides and to her hips, past that to her thighs where he tugged on them so she could wrap her legs around him. It kept them close, but more importantly, it put pressure between their hips.

Pidge sighed, tilting her head back as he began his assault on her neck. Her back arched, pressing herself into him that created a friction, her mind practically melting at the result. Lance groaned, his hands slipping into her shirt and feeling the hot skin hiding beneath it. Even more tantalizing was that she had been prepared for bed, so she wasn’t wearing a bra.

Feeling the supple skin of her breast did things to his body that he didn’t want to admit, namely because he felt like he was ten years old again, reacting at every small sight of cleavage. He was already getting stiff in his jeans, but at least Pidge was reacting to it too.

Every time he brushed his fingers over a nipple she would twitch, the muscles in her legs tightening around his hips. A small pinch would have her back bow, and simply cupping her made her breathe heavily.

The skin on her neck was soft, bitable even, and every time he applied pressure, she would whimper. He didn’t want to admit that those sounds were making him hard too, but they were.

Lance leaned back, looking at the few light bruises he’d left on her neck. His hand up her shirt that was hiked up to expose her stomach.

Her body was different now, but not disappointingly so. She wasn’t as toned out as she used to be, because she didn’t need to train every day. Her body also wasn’t littered in scars from battles, and now that she was older, the childish figure was gone.

It hurt to think that what they once had was gone, but he planned to make up for it now. They had twenty plus years of catching up to do, and he was going to make every second count.

“Y-You’re staring funny…” Pidge whispered, feeling slightly light headed.

“I’m admiring…” He admitted, leaning back further to unhook her legs from his waist. He pressed a kiss into her knee cap, moving up slowly, higher up on her upper thighs to tease her.

Pidge dropped her head into the mattress below her, covering her eyes with her arms. In the dark, with her sense of sight dimmed, her sense of touch picked up every little thing. Every little kiss, touch, lick, and bite. The higher up he moved, the more her thighs quivered, heat burning at her core until he was biting at the bottom of her shorts, pulling the offending material up.

There was a pause, presumably Lance leaning back, but she was shocked to find that wasn’t the case. She let out a gasp as moist, hot air encompassed her clit, a tongue pushing at her through the fabric of her shorts and underwear and teasing her. She trembled, tiny little jerks of her hips pushing his mouth into her only escalating the feeling.

She had forgotten how nice this was. While she had her memories, they could never compare to the real deal, and she had forgotten how good Lance was with his mouth.

“Fuck…” She rasped, her hips rolling into his mouth. Lance held onto her thighs, keeping her steady as he licked a wet spot into her shorts. The sound of him breathing heavily into her, his tongue swiping over her folds had her panting.

There was some form of cheating here. Lance knew how to work her up, only to keep her at the edge of nirvana until he was ready to let her finish. He liked to tease her, and that hadn’t changed.

The heat was intense, and just when she thought she could take no more, he pulled away, wiping his lips off with the back of his hand.

Pidge nearly sobbed when he stopped, looking down at him to see the light from outside beaming across his face, accentuating his strikingly blue eyes in the dark. There was something animalistic in his stare that had her clenching together.

“Lance…” She said his name in a sensual, needy way that had his cock throbbing in his pants.

“I told you we have time…” He uttered, moving up slowly and trailing his lips against her hips. “I don’t plan on being done until morning.”

“Better make that a promise then…” She bleated.

“Trust me. It is.”

Lance’s fingers snagged at the bottom of her shirt, slowly lifting it up. Pidge arched her back to help aid the process, but eventually had to sit up to get it off. The shirt was thrown off somewhere in the mess of her room, to be lost and forgotten about until much later.

Pidge laid back down, covering herself with her arms, but she wasn’t sure why. Lance had seen her naked plenty of times in the past. He’d taken her virginity once already and knew everything about her. Why now was a time she felt shy she wasn’t sure, but she was regardless of the logical thoughts in her head.

Somehow the logical part of her brain wasn’t working right.

Lance’s fingers trailed across her arms deftly, tickling her wrists before moving her arms away from her chest. Completely exposed, the brunette leaned down to suck a nipple into his mouth, his tongue lavishing at the rosy bud slowly.

The little jolts of pleasure had her breath hitching, her chest rising and falling. Lance’s hands were none stop, one of them pinching light at another nipple while the other ran his nails over her skin.

This wasn’t teasing. This was torture. They never had the luxury of drawing sex out, because at any moment could they have been attacked.

Now they could, and she was mourning at her fifteen year old self who never got to properly experience this.

“Lance…” She moaned, resting a hand on the back of his neck. The other was still trapped within his grasp, pinned into the bed beside her to restrict her movement.

“God Pidge…” He breathed heatedly against her skin, his wet lips trailing against her breast. “When you say my name like that… It drives me crazy.”

Pidge couldn’t help but breathlessly giggle at the statement, because he didn’t seem to realize that he was already doing it to her. An eye for an eye in the situation.

Lance moved down again, his mouth and tongue lavishing at her stomach with surprisingly ease. He passed over her navel and down to the hem of her shorts where his fingers skimmed the fabric, his nails lightly scratching her skin.

He peeled away the first article of clothing away slowly, lips kissing every inch of fresh skin exposed to him as he did so. His mouth passed over her clit again, but this time he didn’t spend any time there. He busied himself with pulling her shorts down her legs and off, forgotten about until later.

He was quick to hook his fingers into the elastic of her underwear, pulling that down to expose her completely to him. Nothing hiding her away, and nothing stopping him from his work.

“You’re fucking beautiful, you know that?” That was a rhetorical question, and her brain was too hazy to think of a witty remark to it.

Lance laid down on his stomach, bringing her lower end towards him with impressive strength. Pidge couldn’t help but cover herself, still unsure as to why she was so shy, but he pulled her hands away and pinned them into the bed.

He wasn’t going to let her hide away. There was no reason to hide.

“L-Lance-” She stammered, but whatever she had to say was choked up on a moan as Lance lapped at her folds with no warning.

She bit at her lip to stifle her voice, because she had neighbors to respect, and after their shouting match earlier, she didn’t need to be in anymore trouble. Lance made it hard though.

His tongue flicked against her clit, sucking hard on the sensitive nub before deviling further into her body. His tongue fucked in and out of her slowly, prepping her, simulating what more was to come and having her almost sobbing.

She yanked on her hands for freedom, to grab his shoulders or his hair, the blankets beneath her; _anything,_ but Lance wouldn’t budge. He wouldn’t let go, simply mouthing at her most sensitive areas to break down her walls and have her begging for more, and when she did, he’d tease her more, because he was drawing this out.

Lance looked up at her with a gleam of arousal in his eyes, watching her almost like a predator would, taking in her position and her addictive taste like it was the last thing he would do. Her back bowed, and he enjoyed the way her nipples were pert with arousal. The expressions on her face were lovely to say the least, the way her lips were parted to moan and whimper incoherent words and morphed versions of his name, some curse words thrown in between.

Lance brought her hands together in one hand, keeping them together at the wrists so he could have one hand free for himself, reaching down to part her folds. His fingers rubbed at the wetness present before pushing a finger in, slowly thrusting it up to rub at the sensitive nerves inside of her.

Pidge clenched up, her hips stuttering at the multiple stimulations. She mewled, pulling on her hands again, but no luck. Lance had her trapped, and maybe she should have be concerned, even if the slightest bit, but she wasn’t.

She could feel a coil inside of her getting tighter. Something winding up, ready to snap. It was right there in the place Lance thrust in and out a single finger, his lips sucking on her clit and making her see stars. He was rubbing up inside of her, pressing into something, she didn’t know what, that was burning hot and blinding.

She couldn’t see straight, not with the darkness surrounding them. Her hands were pinned, leaving her with nothing but the ability to feel and ride along for this.

She was right there-

“L-Lance- Ahh!” Her voice cracked at everything around her stilled to this one moment. This one, earth shattering moment where everything went white and she was cumming hard into his mouth. The brunette thrust his finger frantically, pushing her through her orgasm until she finally found her voice, though weak with cries of pleasure.

He didn’t stop though. If anything, Lance sucked harder, pushing his finger in faster and more forceful than before. Pidge’s hips jerked back at the sensation, but that didn’t stop him from doing it more. If anything, it drove him on.

“F-Fuck, Lance! I-I can’t-” She tried to tell him that it was too much; that he was over stimulating her, but she couldn’t.

His finger slowed down for a moment, a moment long enough to allow his middle finger in beside it. There was a definite stretch, because nothing else was ever down there besides her own hands, but the burn wasn’t unpleasant.

Using the fluid from her previous orgasm, he started pushing his fingers in and out, scissoring them from within to stretch her entrance. Pidge practically writhed, still recovering from the last of her orgasm, but that was the point. He was trying to keep her on edge. Somewhere in her lust filled, fogged over mind she knew this, but she couldn’t exactly wrap her head around it.

Pidge’s hips jerked with his thrusting, trying to pull away, but was unconsciously moving towards it. Lance’s tongue was licking all around her too, right beside his fingers and back to her clit to tease it even more. Her back left the bed, rolling into his hand.

He was doing it on purpose. She was already at the edge again, and each burning thrust of his fingers was only bringing her higher.

She choked on his name, gasping loudly when his fingers relentlessly pressed into that spot inside of her. Her toes curled, her feet pushing into the sheets as he brought her to another, more mind numbing release.

Tears burned at her eyes as she came again, hips stuttering as pleasure washed over her entire body. He voice was raspy from crying out, pleading in a way as Lance pushed another finger inside of her. His mouth finally pulled away, but just when she thought he was done torturing her, she was proven wrong.

Lance’s fingers pushed into her with just as much frenzy as before. They attacked that place inside of her relentlessly while his thumb ran over her over sensitized clit, pushing into it with each thrust.

She keened at the pressure, yanking hard on her hands until Lance finally let them go, but only so he could push her hips down into the bed, keeping her still so he could keep up his relentless pleasuring.

With her hands free, one of them tangled into her duvet cover while the other reached between her legs, but only brushed against his hand. It was too much, but her body still selfishly craved more. She couldn’t bring him to stop, even when she felt like she was ready to explode.

Pidge tossed her head to the side, crying into her pillow at the stimulation. She was only vaguely aware of the tears rolling down her cheeks, or the way her voice was getting way too loud. Surely her neighbors could hear her, but the only thought that could come to mind was a simple _fuck them._ She had spent too long wishing for this, and she wasn’t about to ruin it because someone heard them.

With that firmly tucked away, when Lance brought her to her third orgasm, she didn’t bother holding back a scream that sounded vaguely like this name.

Lance was pretty sure that scream would have done him in, but he managed to hold himself back from cumming in his own pants as he fingered her through the throes of pleasure. This time, however, when her orgasm dulled, he finally slowed to a stop.

He pulled his fingers out of her twitching entrance, watching her fluids drip from his fingers and onto the sheets beneath them. She was soaking wet, but pretty thoroughly prepared.

“Pidge,” He rasped, and he was surprised by how desperate his own voice sounded. He hadn’t even gotten undressed yet and he was ready to be inside of her.

The brunette hummed, barely able to form a coherent thought. Her mind was filled with a haze of pleasure too great to filter through, and she didn’t want to. She was pleasantly warm and fuzzy all over, which was all she really needed.

Lance leaned over her, kissing her cheeks softly while his clean hand moved over her sweaty side. Her body was covered in a fresh layer of sweat and flushed from head to toe.

She was so beautiful.

“I-I gotta be inside you, Pidge. I just have too…”

The desperation was intense. Even in their previous life, the urge to have sex and be connected with her wasn’t nearly as great as this. He was so desperate to be tied together with her again, to mark her and claim her that it brought on a bought of anxiety.

He needed to be inside of her. He needed this connection. Every second he wasn’t tied to her had his breathing strain and his heart pound.

“H-Hold on…” She practically mumbled, still out of sorts. Sitting up proved to be difficult, even more so with Lance nuzzling at her neck and placing heavy kisses there. “Let me… Take care of you first.”

Pidge reached for the belt of his pants, tugging on it with shaking fingers before getting the zipper and button undone. His shirt ignored, she pulled his pants down his hips until his cock appeared, slowly at first. He was as hard as she imagined him to be, and as smooth as she remembered. Angry, thick veins were running up his shaft while his balls hung heavily between his legs.

Lance was practically panting just from watching Pidge as she took him in. If ever there was a time to be self-conscious, now wasn’t the time, but she didn’t look disgusted or annoyed. Just curious.

She’d always had an observant eye.

“You’re really hard…” She muttered, seemingly distracted as she ran her fingers up his erection.

“A-All because of you.” He said in a husky tone.

“Lay back…” She instructed with a gentle push against his hips. Lance did as told, sitting back and lifting his hips so she could get his pants off, though there was a struggle when his shoes got in the way.

Once those obstacles were out of the way, however, she settled herself between his open legs, taking the base in her hand, and taking in the heat emanating from it.

It was intimidating, but she knew what drove Lance insane. She remembered some of his weak points, so why not abuse that?

A little bit of payback was fine.

She started out slow, with just feather light touches. She was testing the waters, watching as he took in a shuddering breath, squeezing her covers between his fingers. She was recalling all of his most sensitive spots, and what really made him lose it. She wanted to get her revenge after all.

He was already on edge, and that was fine. She rather enjoyed making him lose his cool even more.

She pressed her thumb into the head, running it in the slit and feeling a wetness there. He was already _leaking,_ all because of her.

The thought brought on a shudder of delight, causing her to lean down and press a warm kiss to the tip.

“Oh fuck…” Lance groaned, placing a hand on the back of her head. Pidge hummed against the head, looking up at him with desire written across her face. Adoration that she could possibly do this to him. It was wonderful.

She didn’t hesitated to take the head into her mouth, sucking lightly around it while her hand massaged the shaft. Lance’s hand cupped the back of her neck as she did, holding on with a tight grip, but nothing painful. Pidge dipped her tongue into the slit, remembering the taste by memory, but not by the actual taste. It wasn’t horrible, but it still wasn’t all that pleasant.

She couldn’t argue it. Where had Lance’s mouth been five minutes ago?

Pidge hallowed out her cheeks and sucked hard, rubbing his balls with her free hand to really put him over the edge. Lance’s breathing was coming out harsher now, panting as she tortured him with these sinful touches and licks.

She pushed down as far as she could manage, pushing her limits, until the head was brushing the back of her throat. She fought with her gag reflex to keep going, to make sure she gave Lance an insane amount of pleasure like he had for her, and it seemed to be working.

“Oh god… Fucking… Pidge…” She shuddered at the way he said her name, a heat burning between her legs.

She wanted him. Needed him so badly, but not yet. She had to make sure he enjoyed everything to the upmost pleasure.

Her lips were red and slightly swollen as she took him in over and over again, slicking up his cock with her saliva. What her mouth couldn’t reach her hand stroked, rubbing into the veins on the underside of his cock, because she remembered that had been really sensitive for him. Just under the head too, which she promptly pulled back to lick.

Lance’s resounding moan was music to her ears. Clearly she was doing something right, and the only thing to do now was to keep doing it.

Watching his cock disappear between her perfect lips was so addictive, and how he could have gone all of his life without her was unbelievable at this point. She was too, too perfect, and he couldn’t imagine another day going by without her.

They fit perfectly together, like pieces to a puzzle. It meant the world to him that he could have her back in his arms again, and right now he couldn’t ask for anything more.

“Fuck, fuck, Pidge,” Lance grunted as he pushed at her shoulders, forcing her back with surprise. “I-I can’t anymore. I’m going to cum.”

“Then cum…” She said it like it was a normal, everyday thing, her lips teasing the slit.

“L-Let me do it inside of you. Please.”

The strength he used to flip Pidge onto her back shouldn’t have been as surprising as it was. She gasped as her back met the bed, knocking the air out of her, but so did the sight of Lance laying above her, holding his cock in his hand near her entrance. He was flushed and panting, visibly shaking as he tried to steady himself. Had she done that to him?

That was a dumb question.

“Hurry up, Lance…” She told him, gripping at his shoulders and pulling him closer. Her legs were spread open, wrapped around his hips, and feeling the head of his cock pressed into her folds. As needy as he was, Lance leaned down to seal his lips over hers, tasting himself on her lips as their fingers entwined.

 His hips pushed forward, finally sinking into her.

At first it wasn’t much. There was a sting, but nothing she couldn’t handle. It wasn’t until he moved forward with a little too much enthusiasm that it hurt, and the lack of proper lubrication didn’t help.

Pidge tried to hold back any sounds of pain, but a whimper escaped her regardless, muffled by Lance’s lips. He leaned back to look at her when he recognized that sound as a sound of pain, not pleasure, his expression falling in concern.

“Does it hurt?” He asked, his breathing heavy.

“Y-Yeah…” She hissed, taking in slow breaths to distract herself from the pain.

“Fuck, I’m sorry.” He apologized as he pulled back, sliding out a bit. “I rushed it-”

“Don’t-” Pidge’s legs locked around his hips, keeping him in place. Even if it hurt, she couldn’t lose this.

“Pidge-”

“D-Don’t move. I’m fine…” She breathed out, tears beading at the corners of her eyes.

“You clearly aren’t.” He argued, but her legs wouldn’t move.

“I-I can’t stop now, Lance. Please…” She pleaded with him, pressing her forehead into his. “It hurt the first time we did it. I know how it goes, so… Just don’t stop…”

 Lance didn’t like it. He didn’t like it one bit. He was all for having sex with her, but not if she was going to be in pain. Even if she said she’d be fine, the idea didn’t sit right.

She wanted to keep going though. She wouldn’t move her legs. She was fighting this just to spend this time together, and that warmed his heart in some odd, morbid way.

So he stayed put. He didn’t move, simply leaned back into her to press soft kisses to her forehead. He rubbed at her sides, her arms, her breasts, her legs, and everywhere else on her to distract her. At some point his hand went in between their legs, pressing his middle and forefinger into her clit in hopes that he could bring her some pleasure.

It felt like it took a while, but eventually the tightness in her muscles lessened. Pidge’s breathing evened out, the pain dissipating into something more bearable. It still hurt, but not nearly as bad.

“Y-You can move a little bit…” She told him, looking up into his eyes while cupping his cheeks between her hands.

Lance nodded his head, taking his careful time so as not to hurt her. He pulled out slowly, going from between watching what he was doing to looking at the expression on her face. He took in every small twitch of her lips, watched as her eyes winced ever so slightly, and listened to how she breathed out a sigh.

He pushed back in just as slowly, feeling a warm, wet heat envelop him. Her hands tightened on his cheeks, but she didn’t make much of a sound. She simply took in her bottom lip between her teeth, looking down at where they were connected with a bit of a fond look in her eyes.

Even in pain, she was happy to be like this with him.

He loved her so much.

“You can move a little more…” She mumbled. “That’s okay…”

Lance nodded his head again before settling his hands on either side of her head, bracing himself before repeating the motion. Pidge’s head dropped back to the pillow as she sighed, her eyes closing. He pushed in again, this time eliciting a small mewl from deep in her throat, and it wasn’t something that sounded racked with pain.

Hearing the sound spurred him on. He kept himself in check to make sure he didn’t overdo it, but he used it as a guide to judge how he was doing. Pushing in until their hips were flushed together, but then pulling back out until just the head was in her seemed to be a method that she liked, judging by the small little whimpers and stutters in her breathing.

Her arms had stayed around his neck mostly, but moved down his back, feeling his sweat soaked shirt and finding it completely in the way. They really should have taken that off first, but she was too caught up in what they were doing now to do something about it.

Her hands ran down his chest, holding his hips with a weak grip as his hips snapped a little more sharply. The motion caused her to let out a small moan, her back arching and pushing her chest up.

Lance alternated between these small snaps of the hips and grinding into her core, pushing his cock in as deep as it would go to rub against her insides. Against that one spot inside her that had her moaning louder.

There we go.

He leaned back, letting her hands fall to rest by her head as he grabbed her hips. He used it as leverage, as a grip to reality as he began a more forceful pace. Each thrust met that bundle of nerves with deadly precision, making her mind blank out of the pain to focus on what was really happening.

With each thrust she became slicker. Her inner walls rippled around his cock, squeezing around him just right to have him panting. He looked between them to where they were joined, watching as he disappeared into her over and over again, buried inside of her and making her crumble and fall apart.

“L-Lance…” She whimpered, her hips slightly rolling into his own.

“H-How is it?” He asked between breathless pants.

“W-What you’re doing… Is-Is good…” Pidge brought a hand to her face, pressing her lips into the back of it to keep her voice down. “It feels n-nice…”

“Good…” Lance huffed, pushing her thighs apart to open her up. Whatever he did seemed to strike a chord within her, making her gasp out loud and arch her back.

The sight was addictive. He wanted to see more.

Lance groaned, feeling himself slip as he pushed into her harder. Pidge’s moans became louder the faster his pace picked up, turning her away to the side to muffle some of her moans in the pillow, but it didn’t do much. What she tried to cover up, he tried to make louder, pushing his fingers into her clit again to stimulate her.

He enjoyed this view a lot. Pidge laying on her back, naked, panting and sweating. Moaning his name as he thrust into her in something bordering rough, pushing her back into the mattress and making her breasts bounce with each slap. Flushed red, her legs open on either side of his hips as his cock disappeared over and over again inside of her.

He could feel his orgasm drawing near. It was already so close and he knew it, but he wasn’t sure how long he could keep this up for. He wasn’t about to disappoint her though.

Using his strength, Lance stilled inside of her before lifting her hips up. He settled them over his legs, keeping her lower half elevated before thrusting into her again.

Pidge cried out, her head tilting back into the pillow as she let her voice out. He didn’t care who heard them, so long as he got the point across that she was his.

“I-I love you, Pidge…” He groaned, his thumb rubbing frantically at her clit to bring her to her orgasm.

He was getting close. He couldn’t be the first to cum.

“L-Love you- Oh fuck!” Pidge sobbed as his thrusts came brutally. He pounded into her until the headboard was hitting the dresser, fucking into her with all of his longing and desire. All of the aggressions of never having her by his side all of this life, and all of the love that bottled up until he felt ready to explode.

The rhythm he built up faltered. As his climax approached him, his hips stalled, breaking off to grind into her or pound her into the mattress.

“F-Fuck, I’m… I-I’m gonna cum…” He warned her, leaning down to wrap his arms around her. It was an awkward position with how her hips were, but he managed to bring her against his chest, fucking into her like he’d never get the chance again.

That should have been done when they were in a war. He had the time now, and this wouldn’t be their last time.

Pidge stiffened in his arms, the screams she so desperately wanted to release trapped in her throat as she came. Lance thrust into her a few more times before reaching his own peak, spilling inside of her and claiming her as his again.

She was completely his, and he was completely hers.

Pidge broke off on a scream, burying her face into his neck to muffle it in his hair. Lance moaned into her neck as well, breathing in the scent of sweat and sex trapped in her hair.

They rocked together for a few more moments, riding down their highs in perfect bliss while clinging onto each other like the world was falling apart around them. They refused to let go, simply basking in their highs together, trapped in each other’s arms.

The world was eerily silent around them. It hadn’t sounded like that before, had it?

Pidge blinked, looking up at her glow in the dark stars and seeing freckles of shadows dance across the ceiling within the light. She had seen the image before from looking up at the ceiling countless nights, but she numbly thought that it was too early in November for it to be snowing outside, even though it had once already.

After a few more minutes, Lance finally sat up slightly. He sounded groggy and tired, but otherwise looked like he had something important he still needed to do. The flickering flame of light in his eyes only proved that.

“Lance…” She whispered, brushing her fingers against his cheek. Pidge was very much aware of how cold it actually was in her room now.

Lance sat up reaching down to the hem of his shirt and finally pulling it off of himself. The cool air bit at his heated, sweaty skin, but the sight of him with the shadows and lights playing off of his damp skin was a sight worth seeing.

His body really was no longer that of a seventeen year old. He had long since filled out and matured, his muscles more prominent and not as much of a stick figure as he had once been.

Pidge sighed softly, feeling his softening cock still inside of her, especially when he rolled his hips into hers. Still so sensitive, she whined, pressing a hand into his stomach to stop him, but Lance promptly pushed it away.

“W-What are you doing?” She asked, her voice hitching when his fingers teasingly danced up her sides.

“I told you, didn’t I?” He asked, leaning down to brush his lips against her own, but pulled away quickly when she tried to properly kiss him. “I don’t plan on stopping until morning.”

* * *

There were some things, Pidge had regretfully come to realize, that she didn’t remember.

She didn’t remember what it was like waking up the morning after, huddled up in blankets and pleasantly sore. She didn’t remember the sensitivity her body felt, how everything seemed amplified tenfold.

The blankets were softer, the fibers finer against her skin. The air outside of them was a cold bite. The sun was shining, and she swore she heard birds chirping. She heard cars passing from what sounded like blocks away, and children outside laughing.

It was funny how just one night could make her feel like everything was right with the world, and yet there was something missing.

Lance.

Rolling over proved he wasn’t by her side, the spot in the bed beside her cold. He hadn’t been there in a while, and looking around her disgustingly messy room only proved that he wasn’t there either. 

Pidge sat up, hissing at the stab up pain in her hips. The soreness there was far more unforgiving than the rest of her body, but she couldn’t say she didn’t regret the process.

Finding her clothes from last night was a waste of energy, so she settled for a sweater and sweat pants. Something to keep her warm as she walked out of her room.

It was eerily quiet through the whole apartment. Nothing but the heater sounded and the clock on her wall ticking away as she looked around for Lance. Not a sign of him. It was like he hadn’t even been here.

“… Rover?” She called out. The dog’s head lifted from where he sat waiting by the front door, but at the call of his owner he jumped up and went to her.

Pidge bent down to pet his head, still looking around the open room with a sense of dread.

Why wasn’t he here? Lance had said that they weren’t in a war, and as such, he shouldn’t have left. He only ever did that so they didn’t want to be caught by their friends, but Shiro inevitably found them.

So why wasn’t he here now? He didn’t have any reasons to leave, did he? Wouldn’t he have told her if something happened and he needed to leave?

Unless. Did he want to leave?

The thought alone was too hard to stomach.

Lance hadn’t even woken her up to tell her he was leaving. He just left. No notes to see and not a sign that he ever even stepped foot in her place. He was gone, and the thought had her heart dropping into her stomach.

Tears managed to spill from her eyes before she could even realize it was happening. Her breathing strained, she curled up beside Rover, hiding her face into his fur to cry out her frustrations.

Why did she ever think something like this could work out? Why did she think she could be happy? All of her life from the moment she met Lance had been nothing but crazy ups and downs, so why should now be any different?

_Because it’s Lance._

Rover suddenly jumped from his place, leaving her on the floor as he ran to the door. Such an action wasn’t normal of the Jindo when she was upset, but she couldn’t understand why she heard key’s at her door.

Rover jumped up on his hind legs, whimpering and scratching at the surface as he would normally for her before the front door opened. He was greeted by Lance, covered up in his heavy jacket with a hat on, gloves on his hands that carried grocery bags, and snow dusting everywhere.

“Hey boy!” He greeted the door, bending down to pat his head. The Jindo had never been more excited to see a stranger than he was with Lance, jumping up in excitement.

It was a sight she never thought she’d see.

“L-Lance…?” Pidge asked, her voice shaking as she stood. Her snow covered boyfriend looked up from the dog, smiling that brilliant smile of his and looking to cute for her mind to comprehend at the moment.

“Aw man, I was hoping you’d still be asleep.” He said, standing up straighter and holding up the grocery bags. “I wanted to make you breakfast. Uh, lunch actually. It’s like twelve thirty so-” He stopped when he noticed the look of distress on her face. “What’s wrong?”

Pidge felt really stupid right now. Really, really stupid, but oh so very grateful to have someone like him still in her life.

He wasn’t going anywhere, and she felt horrible for thinking otherwise.

“I-I thought you left…” She couldn’t help the way her voice broke off, wiping at her eyes when more tears fell. She felt like such a child for crying, but it just wouldn’t stop.

“Oh shit, Pidge, I’m sorry.” He apologized, abandoning the groceries to come up to her and hug her. “I didn’t mean to scare you like that.”

Pidge chuckled against his chest, halfway between a cry and a good hearty laugh.

“I-It’s alright… I’m just glad you came back.” She told him, unperturbed by the snow melting on his jacket or by how cold he was.

“Of course I came back.” He mumbled, pressing a kiss to the crown of her head. “And guess what?”

“What…?” She asked expectantly.

“I went home and grabbed some video games. So once I make lunch and we eat, we can spend all day playing video games.” Lance leaned back, looking into her glassy eyes as he spoke.

“Lance, that sounds wonderful, but…” The smaller of the two looked to her wall clock. “I have work in a few hours.”

“What…?” He gaped with a faux offense. “Come on, Pidge. It’s the day after. It’s the day we spend being lazy and together.” Lance practically whined, his bottom lip jutting out in a pout. “I already called out sick…”

The look was still ruined by his black eye, which was far worse today than it had been yesterday.

“Oh… Fine.” She gave in with very little resistance. Lance pumped his fist in the air, a silent victory. “I’ll call out, but whatever you’re making for lunch better be worth it.”

Lance’s smile warmed her heart.

“I won’t let you down.”

* * *

Thanksgiving was more or less a nightmare, but not anything she didn’t expect.

Pidge was laying on her couch when Lance texted with an exuberance of smiley faced emoji’s and hearts. After the evening she had, seeing even a small text from him still managed to bring a teary eyed smile to her face.

_Lance_

_6:15 p.m._

_“I’m leaving my parents place now, and man am I stuffed! I think my belt broke!”_

She chuckled at his enthusiasm, but didn’t respond right away. She wanted to pretend that the world around them wasn’t there, and that all she had to endure didn’t exist at the moment.

In some fairy tale land, her parents didn’t think the worst of her for loving someone.

_Lance_

_6:17 p.m._

_“So how was dinner with your family?”_

She knew that one was coming, and yet she had hoped that Lance wouldn’t ask her anything. She didn’t want to respond, but she knew that if she didn’t, he would call her. This could be both a good and bad thing.

_“Let’s just say I left early and leave it at that. I don’t really want to talk about it right now.”_

_-Sent_

That wouldn’t get rid of him, and it should have come as no surprise that he texted a quick _“I’m coming over”_ before doing as such. She didn’t even bother getting up when he knocked or when Rover went on his usual barking rampage, because Lance came in, and the minute he did, the dog stopped.

She looked over the back of her couch, watching Lance shrug his coat off before walking into the living room.

“So what happened?” He asked, taking a seat beside her. Despite his body being as cold as it was outside, Pidge laid down to rest her head in his lap. Lance’s fingers were cool to the touch, but having them card through her long hair helped her breathe evenly.

“… Everything started out fine, but I knew I couldn’t hide you forever.” She mumbled, her breathing stuttering for just the slightest of seconds. “It’s not like I tried, but…”

“Uh oh…” He knew where this was going.

“They asked me how I had been. I said I was seeing someone, and that I was happy with you. They asked about you… I told them your name.” Pidge blinked back a burn of unshed tears. How many times this week did she need to cry? “A-And my parents just looked at me as if I was some alien from out of this world…”

Lance sighed before leaning down to kiss her head.

“They told me that what I was doing was wrong, and that I was just seeking out my fantasies with someone who had Lance’s name…”

“I feel like there’s an _and_ or a _but_ somewhere here.” Lance mentioned.

“… And they said if I was going to keep up this childish behavior, they were going to take away their money and stop supporting me…” Her voice quivered as she swallowed hard.

“My god…” Her boyfriend uttered. “I’m sorry, Pidge…”

“It’s not your fault.”

“It kinda is. Just a little bit.” Lance rubbed at her side, trying to think of some way to make her feel better, but he couldn’t come up with anything.

He’d been on his parent’s bad side as well. He knew the looks she mentioned, the hateful, hurtful glances towards him for something he couldn’t deny. The mean words that left permanent scars in his life, and that destroyed his childhood and most likely would linger for the rest of his days.

He knew all too well, and he hated that there wasn’t much he could do to make her feel better. It was her _parents_ after all.

“So… What are you going to do?” He couldn’t help but ask.

“If you think I’m dumping you, then you’re wrong.” She stated strongly, but her watery eyes gave way to her pain. “I can’t lose you too, but… I don’t know what to do. I can’t afford to live here on my own.”

“Your parents are really going to do this to you?” He asked her, which seemed like a stupid question. She nodded her head softly against his leg.

“I thought about lying and telling them that we weren’t together, but I don’t want to keep lying and pretending I’m okay when I’m not.”

“Then stop doing that.” He asserted. “Stop faking it, Pidge. Start taking care of yourself, and if that means you have to break away from them, then… Maybe that’s what you have to do.”

“But what do I do about the apartment?” She questioned, finally sitting up. Rover waddled past them with his tennis ball in his mouth. “My job doesn’t pay well enough to handle this place and bills.”

It didn’t take Lance long to come up with a conclusion. A crazy one, but a solution all the same.

“Get rid of it then.” He suggested.

“And where am I supposed to live?”

“Move in with me.”

It took a couple of seconds to let that sink in. A couple of heart beats later, and it finally settled, the outlandish idea like a splash of cold water to her face.

“… Huh?”

Just because it made sense now didn’t mean that she could form a full thought to structure into a sentence.

“Move in with me.” He told her, taking up her hands with such a serious look on his face. “Get away from them and stay with me.”

“W-What… What?” The expression on Pidge’s face was priceless, and probably funnier than it needed to be. “Do you hear what you’re saying?”

“I’m the one that suggested it.”

“Lance, I don’t… What?” That was the only thing that could come to mind at the moment. Not a proper response or even a yes or no. Just a simple question.

“What…?” He replied with.

“Lance… Y-You’re asking me to live with you.”

“… I believe I am.” He wasn’t seeing where she was getting lost here.

“H-How? I-I don’t even… I can’t even…”

“Then don’t. Just break your lease, finish out the month, and come live with me.”

“Do you hear what you’re saying, Lance?” She questioned. “Y-You’re suggesting we live together.”

“I know.”

“Do you know how crazy that would be?”

“Are you forgetting that we lived together for three years already?”

“On a space ship in outer space! Fighting a war! W-We had our own rooms, and-!”

“Pidge,” He stopped her with a pointed glance and a hand over her mouth. Pidge’s eyes were even bigger now, and he could imagine a pout behind his hand. “If this is your way of saying you don’t want to, then that’s fine.”

“What?” He gasped behind his hand. “N-No, I want to! It’s just… So fast…”

“Yeah, but I think we’re past the point of taking our relationship slow.” He mentioned with a small chortle.

“Moving in…” She mumbled. “What about Rover?”

“My apartment takes pets.” He supplanted. “I was hoping to get a pet soon anyway, but Rover already loves me. _You_ already love me, so why not?”

She couldn’t think of any arguments as to why not. She actually couldn’t think of anything to say that at the very least sounded smart. This was all happening so fast, but did she really have a choice? Her parents weren’t giving her a choice. She couldn’t live on her own, and she loved Lance.

So, why not?

* * *

“You just had to do this in December, didn’t you?” Keith grunted as he carried one of Pidge’s boxes into the living room, his hat dipping over his eyes and snow covering his shoulders.

“Only to make your life more miserable,” Lance retorted, taking the box from him with a gruff laugh.

“I hate you both.” He pointed at Lance and Pidge before fixing his hat, moving his hair from his face.

“You love us. That’s why you’re helping.” Pidge said, unhooking Rover’s leash.

“Whoa, don’t I get any love?” Shiro asked them as he came out of Lance’s room, an empty box in hand. “I did most of the heavy lifting.”

“You have all of our love.” Pidge told him, smiling at the man as she took the empty box from him. However, she stopped when she heard the weirdest sound, but a sound she recognized all too well. Looking down only proved her suspicions correct when she saw Rover peeing on the carpet. “Rover, no!”

“It’s alright, Katie. It’ll come out with some stain remover.” Lance assured her. They had yet to use the name _Pidge_ around their friends yet. “Besides, he’s just marking his territory. Proving that there’s another man in the house now.”

“Men are so weird.” She remarked with a sneer.

Once Rover was done relieving himself on Lance’s carpet (Pidge guessed she could refer to it as her own now too), Lance grabbed at one of his toy’s in an open box and waved it around. Rover jumped at him, reaching for it, but Lance yanked it back before the dog could grab it between his teeth. Lance continued this game, playfully tugging it away, sometimes pretending to throw it so Rover would run down the hallway to find it, only to run back when he realized that the ball hadn’t actually been thrown.

The sight was too cute to resist. Pidge set her box down to pull out her phone and snapped a picture, just to be sure she had it saved. The picture she got was pretty good too, just of Rover jumping up for his toy and Lance holding it away, but she smiled at how wonderful it was.

This was her life now. As scary as it had seemed before, she was feeling pretty good about it now that they’d gotten her stuff from her apartment. It’d take a few hours to really unpack everything she had, and to rearrange everything to fit some of her own furniture, but that was fine. They’d make do.

They kind of had to at this point. She had to give up her security deposit to get out of her apartment early.

“Do you guys think you’ll need help unpacking?” Shiro asked them, setting down the last box that Keith brought in.

“No, we can take it from here.” She assured them.

“Man, I can’t believe you two actually moved in together.” Keith said, looking around Lance’s apartment.

“I-It’s kind of fast, we know…” Pidge mumbled, looking away with apprehension.

To them it wasn’t fast at all, but to their friends it was. In their eyes, Pidge, who they still knew as Katie, and Lance had only know each other for a few months, and their relationship started just a month and a half ago.

They didn’t know why it was such a sudden decision either. While they wanted to be truthful, they kept quiet about the fact that Pidge’s parents had taken away their support from her. All they knew was that their relationship was moving quicker than the normal relationship should.

It was crazy fast to them, but they hadn’t been vocal about their haphazard decisions at all. In fact, they had been pretty supportive.

“Well yeah it’s fast, but you guys are happy together.” Keith said with a small smile. “And so long as you’re happy, I’m happy.”

“Thank you, Keith.” Lance said, his heart feeling warm from his words.

“I agree.” Shiro said. “I can’t sit here and argue someone’s life. That’s not how it works.”

“Can you tell that to the rest of the world then?” Pidge asked him, twirling her finger to indicate that she was pointing everywhere.

“Maybe this is the start of something great.” Shiro offered. “Maybe you guys will be the first of our little group to blossom, and maybe that’ll get us all looking for relationships too.”

“So here’s what we do.” Pidge suddenly announced. “We’re going to have a big party, and we’re going invite Matt, and then just lock him in a room with Keith.”

“Oh my god, _stop_.” Keith groaned as he covered his face, hiding the light dusting of color on his pale skin. It wasn’t often he would get worked up like this, so how could she possibly pass up the opportunity?

“She’s kidding, Keith,” Lance told him, finally tossing the ball that he’d been torturing Rover with. The dog darted down the hall, finally giving him his peace. “But once we get Katie settled in, we are going to have a house warming party. Or, sort of a house warming party… We’re going to have a party, that’s for sure.”

“That sounds great.” Shiro’s smile seemed to brighten up the room. “Is there any house warming gifts you two might need?”

“I need the entire set of Galore comics.” Lance spoke up.

“How is that a house warming gift?” Keith asked incredulously.

“It’s not. I just need it.” The brunette assured him, making Keith roll his eyes.

“And on that note, we’re going to head out.” Shiro told the two younger adults. “Text us about the party, okay?”

“Got it!” Pidge gave him a big thumbs up before the two of them got their coats back on and left. This left the three of them alone, Rover looking all too pleased with the ball in his mouth, despite the mess he had just made on the floor. Pidge set down a box before heading to the kitchen, looking for some sort of towel or something to clean up the mess (She didn’t know where everything was yet), but stopped short with a yelp as Lance’s arms wound around her and picked her up. “L-Lance-!”

The brunette didn’t say a word. He just carried her back to the living room to drop her haphazardly on the couch, Rover running up beside them in excitement as he laid over her. With his hands on either side of her head and his knees bracketing her hips, she was trapped under his warm, inviting gaze.

“Hey there,” He said, beaming down at her with a grin that could only spell out trouble.

“Hey…?” She asked, chuckling as she reached up to touch his shoulders. “What are you doing?”

“Enjoying this moment with my girlfriend.” He stated like it was the most well-known fact in the world.

“Shouldn’t I clean up Rover’s pee though? It’s going to stain.” She told him.

“Ah, get it later. The whole place will be a mess for a few days anyway.” He assured her, looking about quickly at the boxes placed everywhere, the extra recliner, and the extra coffee table. The couch had been decidedly left behind for the next tenant to move in.

“I wouldn’t want to make a mess.” Pidge uttered. Lance dramatically grasped at his chest over his heart, making a gagging sound in distress.

“Pidge Gunderson doesn’t want to make a mess? I don’t- Argh!” He dropped all of his weight on top of her, pinning her beneath his body as he faked his own death beside her ear. “Ugh, the pain! The agony!”

“Lance!” She laughed at the ticklish sensation against her neck, recoiling to avoid it, but enjoying the close, physical contact all the same.

They settled together with laughter, Lance winding his arms around her waist while she settled hers over his shoulder. Rover had jumped around at their antics, but settled down once they had.

Lance and Pidge shared soft glances at one another, awkwardly so with how Lance’s head laid against her shoulder, but neither of them cared. It was fine like this. So long as they were together.

So long as they weren’t alone anymore.

“This is… Going to be hard to get used to…” She mumbled, her fingers brushing his bangs from his face. Lance was in need of a haircut soon.

“Yeah…” He agreed, his hand skimming up her side. “But it’ll be okay.”

“Yeah…”

She knew it would be. It had to be. They didn’t have much choice in the matter anymore, but they’d done this before when living on the castle ship, and they could do it again.

It was just going to be a bit different, and instead of sleeping in separate rooms to avoid being caught, they’d be sleeping in the same room, in the same _bed_. They’d share breakfast in the mornings on Lance’s couch, her couch now too, watching TV and chatting. They’d kiss each other goodbye before work and when classes started back up, and come home to one another to talk about their days. They’d walk Rover together or at different times when they could, and would spend their days unpacking, but also planning for Christmas.

Admittedly, she wasn’t spending it with her parents. That was a given now. Lance would be spending it with his family, so she could stay home and hang back with Rover like she normally did. At least they’d get to spend their days hanging Christmas decorations and setting up the Christmas tree.

She couldn’t even think of what all she could get Lance. A new jacket maybe? His old one was filled with holes, and he refused to buy a new one due to money. That wasn’t much on the gift scale.

Oh well. She still had some time to think of gifts. Right now they needed to spend their time figuring out where everything would go in hopes that the clutter of boxes and furniture would go away. Then they could start planning a house warming party, which really wasn’t much of a house warming party since Lance had lived here for a year and a half now, but she digressed.

“Hey,” Lance mumbled, shifting to sit up slightly.

“Hmm?”

“I love you,” He told her, his smile bright and full, stretching his cheeks apart and making her heart swell.

“I love you too,” She smiled as she leaned up to kiss him, her fingers tangling into his hair just as the doorbell rang. Rover was a barking mess, making both of them groan, Lance more so, because his kiss had been interrupted. “I guess Shiro and Keith forgot something.”

“Probably their keys.” Lance grunted as he got up off of her and off of the couch. Pidge called out for her dog while Lance shushed him away, opening up the door and feeling a blast of cold air and snow hit his face.

He was more than surprised to see a tall brunette standing behind the door, now Shiro or Keith. A man with features so similar to Pidge’s that he almost wanted to laugh, but didn’t.

“Matt…?” Instead he regaled at the sight of Pidge’s older brother standing on the other side of his door, huddled up warm in his jacket, scarf, hat, gloves, and winter boots. Her older brother frowned, clearly confused by the man in front of him addressing him so informally.

“… Do I know you?” He asked.

Right. Matt didn’t have the memories that he and Pidge shared.

“U-Uh, you look so much like Pi- Your sister.” Lance caught himself quickly.

“Matt…?” Pidge had come to see who was at the door, surprised to say the least at the sight of her brother.

“Hey Katie,” He greeted with a smile, acting as if Lance wasn’t there.

“What are you doing here?” She asked, walking up to the door.

“Would it be cool if I come in first?” He asked, shifting his weight on his cold feet. “It’s cold out here.”

“Oh, yeah,” Lance opened the door wider for him. “Come on in.”

Matt did, kicking off his boots on the mat set on the floor so he didn’t track snow. As he did, Lance looked over at his girlfriend, giving her an awfully vague, but confused look. As if silently asking how Matt knew they lived there, and how he found his place to begin with.

“I had to give him my new address. In case of emergencies,” She explained in a quiet tone, as if Matt couldn’t hear the conversation happening only two feet from him. “Matt, what are you doing here?” His sister asked again.

“I had to come check on you,” He told her, removing his hat to let his bangs fall in his face. Even though Matt was older in this life, he and Pidge still bared such a striking resemblance. “Did you think I was just going to let you do this without scoping out the situation?”

“I had hoped, but I knew you wouldn’t.” She remarked, feeling flushed at how Matt was in Lance’s- _Their_ apartment without a warning.

“So this is Lance, huh?” Matt asked, finally looking to the older man standing behind her.

“Uh, yeah. Nice to meet you, Matt.” Lance said, holding out his hand. Matt regarded him with an unreadable look, taking off his gloves, but not shaking his hand.

“You look like the pictures she drew of you.” He mentioned.

“You drew pictures of me?” Lance asked as he looked to the smaller woman beside him.

“I drew stick figures. He’s being an ass.” Pidge remarked, crossing her arms over her chest. Lance’s hand slowly lowered, his blue eyes falling to the floor in discomfort.

Matt and Lance had never seen eye to eye before, due to Lance’s crush on Allura that her older brother also had on her. At first Matt didn’t argue, simply minding his own business, but when Lance’s affections turned to his baby sister, that’s when he had the problem.

Old habits die hard, apparently.

“So do I get a tour?” Matt asked, looking back to Pidge with a smile.

“Uh, well this is most of it. The bathroom is down the hall, and Lance’s, or, _our_ bedroom is off to the right.” She said, pointing towards their room with a toss of her hand. Lance didn’t miss the way Matt’s eyebrows raised in mild surprise.

He should have known that, now that they lived together, they were going to share a room. He must have known that they were a serious couple, but there must have been some part of him that had been trying to deny the truth that sat right in front of him.

“Smaller than your place.” He mentioned, intending the insult.

“It’s homier though,” She fought back, not taking his crap for a second. The only one who knew how to fight with him was her. “And I’m not alone anymore.”

“You weren’t alone before. You had Rover,” He told her, motioning to the dog at her feet who had gone for his toy snake to bring it to him.

“You know that’s not the same.” She argued. Matt shrugged his shoulders, at a loss for an argument to that.

“… Could have moved in with me.” He suggested, but he had a feeling that wasn’t an option already.

“And move out of the state?” She asked. “What about school? My friends? What about Rover? Your apartment doesn’t take pets.”

Matt sighed heavily, having thought of all of those arguments and knowing that it wasn’t as easy as he wanted it to be.

“I know. I just figured it would have helped you…” Matt leaned against the wall, his brown eyes falling to Lance to scrutinize him. “And you just jumped on this idea, huh?”

“It was my idea.” Lance explained. “Not hers.”

“Can I ask why you decided to go along with it?” He asked of his sister.

“Because I love him,” She stated simply, but not without some defensiveness.

“You’ve only known him for a couple of months.” Matt agued. “You’ve been going out for less than that.”

“We’ve known each other for years now.” Lance spoke up. He couldn’t help but feel irritated with her older brother.

Matt didn’t have to believe her, but he didn’t need to be so unsupportive.

“You have…?” Matt looked to his sister with a frown. “How long have you two known each other?”

“Since she was fifteen.” Lance answered for her, pulling Matt’s attention back to him. “And since I was seventeen. Since we were fighting in a war.”

Pidge was more or less horrified that Lance could speak so openly about their past. She never brought it up around Matt, just because she feared he’d leave her too. She couldn’t lose him, so she didn’t mention it again to keep him at her side.

To have Lance so openly discuss it had her shaking in fear, her eyes wide as she stared between him and Matt, who looked less surprised, and more downtrodden.

“… She told you the story too?”

“She didn’t tell me. I already lived it.” Lance asserted, his back straightening as he prepared himself. “My name is Lance McClain. I was the Blue Paladin of Voltron, and at one point the Red Paladin. It’s a long ass story.”

It was indeed a long story. One that Matt had heard countless times when she was a child, still free to speak of her imaginary friends and of her adventures with them.

Or maybe not so imaginary.

“We fought as teammates, and at one point you fought with us as a Captain in the rebellion too. We fought together to defeat Zarkon and save the universe after ten thousand years of his bullshit, which Pidge should have never gone through, but she did, because she was trying to find you and her father.”

Matt’s expression didn’t change much as he listened to him, which made it difficult to tell if that was a good or bad thing. Regardless, he was listening instead of leaving, which meant something.

“She never _told me_ anything. I’ve been stuck with these memories all of my life. I get it; it’s hard to believe, but that’s what we lived, and I don’t know why you can’t seem to accept that at least so she can be happy.”

“Of course I do,” He argued.

“Then why can’t you stand up for her when her parents are kicking her out?”

“I did!” Her brother’s voice raised at him in anger, frustrated with the accusations when he didn’t even know the whole story. “I always stood up for her, but our parents don’t listen! Even after she left a week ago, it was like arguing with a brick wall!”

“You fought with them?” She asked, the information news to her. She didn’t know that Matt fought with them, seemingly more than once. He argued with them multiple times for her, but her parents were stubborn to a point. They weren’t going to budge.

 “Yeah…” Having Pidge speak up seemed to settle down the last of his short fuse, letting him take a moment to get his thoughts back in order and cool down before speaking again. “I told them that it wasn’t fair what they were doing to you, and that they shouldn’t have been taking it out on you for something you can’t control, whether it was real or not, and… I told them that if they really decided to do this to you, I was going to side with you.”

“… Really?” Pidge asked. Matt slowly nodded his head.

“What did they say?” Lance could help but wonder out loud.

“They said that if I was going to be that way that I should leave…” He admitted, his hands dipping into his pockets. “So I did. Haven’t heard from them since.”

“Wow…” Lance uttered. He had wondered what could have happened to the family he had once heard of. The perfect, happy family, where Sam was a man of intelligence and kindness, and Colleen was a nurturing, caring mother.

When had it all fallen apart?

“I’m sorry, Matt…” Pidge mumbled, walking up to wrap her arms around his waist. Matt smiled softly as he wound his arms around her, keeping her against his chest. “This is my fault, isn’t it?”

“Of course it isn’t,” Matt told her, reaching up to tuck her hair behind her ear. “It was my decision. I could have stayed if I really wanted to, but I didn’t. You being happy means the world to me, Katie. I’d rather see you happy then have to play nice with our parents…”

Pidge was crying. Lance could tell by the way her shoulders shook softly, and by the way she kept her face pressed into his coat. She was trying to hide it, but there really wasn’t any way to hide this.

“I love you, Matt…” She whimpered into his coat. Rover came up to them and stood on his hind legs, placing his paws at her hips to help her feel better.

“I love you too…” He assured her, resting his head on top of hers. It was only a moment of calmness between the siblings, a moment of understanding before Matt’s eyes fell back on Lance, narrowing and threatening. “And you…”

Lance blinked back his anxiety, trying to seem more stoic than he felt. Even after standing up to him, he still felt three feet tall under the man’s gaze that was surprisingly similar to Pidge’s.

His girlfriend looked up at her brother with a frown, squeezing around his sides, but that didn’t stop him. Matt had something to say, and he was going to make sure he got his point across.

“Y-Yeah…?”

Pidge’s older brother stepped away from her, poking a finger into Lance’s chest.

“Katie means the world to me. She’s my baby sister, and her happiness means everything to me,” Like he had said already. “So if you hurt her in any way, I’ll have your head on a stake while the rest of your body is never found.”

“Very descriptive…” Lance muttered nervously, feeling the way Matt’s finger dug into his chest. “But if it makes any difference, I don’t plan on hurting her ever. If I do, then I give you full permission to kill me. Hell, I’ll leave my head for you to save you the mess.” He assured the older man, putting his hands up in a show of defense.

Matt pulled his hand away, not looking in the least bit pleased by his offer. He didn’t look any angrier though, and that was all that mattered.

“And take all of my fun away?” The brunette asked. Her older brother sounded so serious that he shuddered at the thought. “No thanks. I’ll do it myself.”

“Matt.” Pidge reprimanded him. Her brother smiled at her, rubbing at the back of her head softly.

“Don’t worry. You won’t be there to see it.”

_“Matt.”_

Their bickering was still the sweetest thing to see. At least to Lance it was. He’d often look to them and smile when he had missed his family, feeling a sense of warmth in his heart at how wonderful their relationship had been, and still was.

It was good to know that they were still so close.

* * *

Waking up on Christmas morning in the arms of someone loved was a whole experience neither of them had gotten the chance to live. Huddled under the blankets on a cold morning, frost covering the windows, dimming the lighting in the room, and a sense of peace in the air bringing a whole new sensation to their living arrangements.

Pidge was the first to wake up, blinking sleep from her eyes and stifling a yawn into her hand. Rover’s head lifted from where he laid in his dog bed, his tail wagging with excitement now that she was awake.

Awake was a term used loosely.

Pidge lifted her hand, running it up Lance’s arm that was securely around her bare waist. The fine dusting of hair on his arm to the warmth of his skin brought goose bumps to her own, sighing in content as she looked over her shoulder.

Lance was still fast asleep, his head nuzzled against the back of her neck, where his lips barely brushed against her shoulder. His right arm was under her head, acting as a pillow while the other had a firm grip on her. At some point in the night she remembered him rolling over in his sleep, his arm finding her and tugging her close. Something like that caused a feeling in her heart she simply couldn’t describe with words, but she knew she was happy. That was all she needed to know.

Looking up at the time, the clock read eight thirty. Early enough to be up, but not late enough to wake him up. However, she didn’t need to be the one to wake him up.

“Rover…” She whispered quietly, too quiet for Lance to wake from. The dog’s ears perked up, his tail wagging faster. “Come here, boy.”

Pidge patted the bed beside her, and that was all it took for the dog to dart like a rocket from his bed. He jumped on the bed in record time, pouncing on the both of them and startling Lance awake. He yelped and rolled onto his back, but that was the worst mistake he could have made. Rover was too excited, and in a show of enthusiasm he whipped around, his paws landed exactly where the sun didn’t shine.

Lance groaned in pain, placing his hands between his legs to guard whatever chances of having kids he had left as the dog stumbled around their legs and the blankets. Pidge couldn’t help but laugh at the entire show, and really, she should have felt bad for Lance’s new injury, but there was just something too funny about it to stop.

She did after some time, but that was when Lance had gone still and quiet, laying his head against her arm with his hands still between her legs.

“Merry Christmas…?” She said questionably, running a hand through his hair that was in dire need of a cut again.

“Was that supposed to be Rover’s present?” Lance asked, his voice small and high pitched.

“I guess so.”

“Tell him to return it.” Pidge laughed as she rolled onto her side, pressing a hand into his chest to help him lay back.

“Take a deep breath in and out.” She told him, rubbing over his stomach. “Breathe through the pain. Think of it as one eighth of the pain of giving birth to a child and you should feel better.”

Lance groaned audibly at the thought.

Pidge laughed at him, leaning down to press a kiss to his lips. She was surprised to feel him kiss back, that he had enough strength to do such after such a _“fatal”_ injury. Nevertheless, she wasn’t complaining, and hummed as his hand lifted to push her bangs from her face.

“Merry Christmas…” She breathed against his lips, shuddering at the way his other hand ran delicately, teasingly up her back.

“Merry Christmas…” He replied, his lips moving across her cheek.

“My brother is going to be here in an hour… We should probably get up.” She told him, toying with the idea of simply staying in bed for a few more moments of playful touching and kissing. Lance seemed to ignore her suggestion, tipping her back on the bed and hovering over her.

There was something to be said about waking up next to Pidge in the morning, on _Christmas morning_ , staring down at her beautiful, bare self with nowhere to go and nothing to do. Even though her brother would be here soon and they’d visit his family later in the day, nothing about this moment could be ruined.

Except for the way she looked past his head at their bookshelf.

“How did my underwear get up there?” She asked curiously. Lance twisted to look up, seeing her underwear hanging off of one of their school books.

“I was wondering what I did with those last night…” He mumbled.

Pidge’s laughter was infectious, but who wouldn’t laugh at this situation? Lance fell to his side, clutching at his stomach as he laughed with her in the early hours of Christmas morning, Rover sitting at their feet and panting, his tail wagging at their laughter.

She had her concerns before, but so far Pidge was pretty damn happy with how this was all turning out, even if it all was fast past. She couldn’t imagine her life without Lance anymore, and now she couldn’t imagine moments like this not happening. While she missed their days on the castle ship, those memories would be cherished while she lived in the now.

Pidge was beginning to think, as Lance sat up in search for his clothes, that she was remembering how to live again.

“What did you do with my shirt?” He asked her, crawling over her to show off his naked body while looking over the edge of the bed.

“I ate it in the throes of passion.” She remarked wistfully as he found it. He looked at her with a smirk before throwing it on, and Pidge was going to pretend she wasn’t morning the loss of his body while she sat up, her long hair snagging under her elbow.

Lance finally climbed out of bed, Rover jumping down from the mattress and following him to the closet, because he hadn’t been fed yet, and the Jindo was fully aware that he’d get Christmas breakfast as a present.

Pidge sat up, watching as he moved about with their dog close at his heels. She pulled her hair out from behind her back, pulling it through her fingers and fixing some snags and tangles that were getting far too irritating for her to handle. Her hair had come down past her waist now, at her hips, but this was too the point she felt she couldn’t handle anymore.

She’d been growing it out as Katie, and while she believed that her hair didn’t define her as a person, she was really getting sick of it.

“What do you think if I cut my hair short again?” She asked him, looking up as Lance shrugged on a pair of sweat pants.

“Okay…?” Lance uttered questionably. “It’s your hair, and it’ll grow back.”

“Would you be mad?”

“No, of course not.” Now fully dressed, and with a begging dog at his feet, Lance bent down to pat at his head before heading for the door. “I just figured you kept it long, because you liked it.”

“I did miss long hair, but I miss my short hair. This is getting ridiculous.” She uttered, tossing it from her face and sitting up.

“Whatever floats your boat, my dear.” He waved his hand past the door as he left, Rover running past him and to the kitchen. Pidge rolled her eyes at him, a flush of color on her cheeks at the affectionate pet name. That had been new, and both of them were still testing out cute nicknames to use on one another.

Outside of the apartment, when they were with their friends, they used the excuse that Pidge was a cute nickname Lance gave her, just so they could use it around them. The others thought nothing of it, and thought it was funny to tease her with it, when, in reality, it meant the world to her to hear Keith, Hunk and Shiro call her Pidge again. If they could get them to say it until it stuck, she’d be the happiest girl in the world.

Not that she already wasn’t.

Pidge got out of bed with some strain in her lower back before getting dressed. She decided now was a good time to get her nicer clothes out since Matt would be joining them. At some point she’d have to cover up the hickey on her neck, which she startlingly discovered while looking at herself in the mirror, looking over herself and the outfit she picked.

He did it on purpose. He had to. This was Lance’s way or proving the world that she belonged to him and only him, but did he had to do it when Matt was showing up?

Maybe it would be better if she wore a turtle neck.

Pidge remedied her appearance, picking out a more appropriate shirt before grabbing at her phone. Her eyes lingered on the screen for a moment, seeing a text from Matt before she looked to Lance’s laptop, still open and running from last night.

That man had been on it and typing like crazy. Whatever he’d been working on seemed incredibly important to him, but he wouldn’t let her see what it was he was typing. It took everything in her to force him away from the laptop and to get into bed with her for sleep, but Lance had other plans, it seemed.

Maybe that was his punishment for taking him away from his project.

Some punishment.

Curiosity peaked, Pidge looked to the door of their room, listening for the sounds of Lance feeding Rover before going to his laptop and shaking the mouse. The screen flashed on, an open page to his email staring in front of her with two new emails.

That hadn’t been what he’d been working on. Whatever it had been he saved and closed out of.

Pidge opened up his writing application, looking through the most recently saved files to find what it was he had been working on. Mostly school related files, but there was one that stuck out the most.

_Voltron: Legendary Defender_

_Last edited on December 24 th, 10:49 p.m._

Pidge opened the file, the little voice in her head telling her that she shouldn’t have been looking through Lance’s things, but it was drowned out as she read over the first few paragraphs.

_“My name is Lance McClain, and if you’re looking for an action packed, thriller with a tiny bit of romance and spice thrown in, you’ve got it, but it’s not what you’re thinking. This doesn’t involve vampires and werewolves, and it’s not an angsty teenage romance, although I swear sometimes it felt like that._

_That was mostly my fault, I admit, but I’m not talking about that._

_I’m talking about my life. Well, past life. It’s not at all the sort of happy ending story either, but I digress._

_I guess if I were to start, I should start from the beginning. I should give out a setting, place, and time._

_I was born in Arizona, but my family is from Cuba. I promise, I’m not going that far back._

_I was once entertained by the idea of a business job. Some nine to five desk job, which really, a fifteen year old shouldn’t give a damn about, but I did. That changed, however, when my uncle and aunt took my brothers, sisters and I to a mountain for camping, and I looked up at the stars in the sky._

_So went the dream of being a nine to five, and then came the dream of being up with those stars. I wanted to be up there in space. I wanted to be a pilot. I wanted to fly._

_So when I turned sixteen, I applied to be a part of the Galaxy Garrison…”_

Pidge stopped reading there, her heart thumping hard in her chest while her eyes watered. Rover’s footsteps resounded from the kitchen, running around as Lance began playing with him, so she still had time.

Instead of picking up from there, Pidge scrolled down through what seemed to be an eternity of pages. Two hundred and fourteen to be exact, before she found a decent spot to read.

_“I don’t see any Galra,” Hunk’s voice was on high alert as he looked about the destroyed planet, pieces of the mantle lifting into the air, which lacked a strong gravity._

_“Looks like the fancy Galra finder doesn’t work. Nice try, Pidge.” I said, but not without a tone of sarcasm. I knew I had been right, but I just had to rub it in just a little. Being a step ahead of our resident tech expert was kind of fun in a weird sort of way._

_“Thank goodness you’re here,” We heard the Taujeerian Shiro had approached one he left his lion speak, panicked and anxious. “I am Baujal, the leader of the Taujeerians. The Galra just destroyed our ships engines and left.”_

_“So the Galra were here. Lance.”_

_Alright, I’ll admit. I deserved that one. I deserved the sarcasm she fought back with, and I deserved to feel like an ass. I don’t think I should have been blushing though, and I wasn’t sure why I was."_

Wait, he had been blushing? She never saw that.

Pidge skipped ahead to where the document had been last edited, which put her at three hundred and ninety eight pages.

Lance had really put his time into this.

_“Alright, what are we doing now?” I asked, more so to Shiro than Pidge or Slav, but she was the first to answer._

_“Let’s call Allura and let her know that we have Slav, and we’re ready for her to use the Teledov.”_

_“You didn’t say we’d be traveling by Teledov!” Slav suddenly interjected, stepping between Pidge and I. She had to back up into the coms spec to avoid one of his many arms smacking into her._

_I thought I could hear Shiro’s head exploding beside me._

_“What’s the problem? We’re traveling by Teledov! So just count your hair follicles, or fluff a pillow, or whatever you need to do to make sure we survive the worm hold trip in this reality!” His rant was finished with an angry finger pointed at the man… Thing that Slav was, standing beside me._

_I had never seen or heard Shiro blow up like that before, and to see a man so calm, cool, and collected lose his shit was actually kind of frightening. All of us were stunned into silence by the outburst, Slav frozen in place. Pidge was practically sitting on the coms spec to get as far back as possible, and if I were standing, I would join her._

_Shiro looked away, his little outburst under control, but regretted. Now would have been the perfect time for silence, but two of Slav’s hands poked together by his index fingers, looking sheepish in a way._

_“I was just going to point out that the Teledov is a very efficient form of travel.” He excused, his fingers poking repeatedly._

_I think Shiro would have lost it had Allura not suddenly contacted us."_

Pidge smiled at the memory. She had forgotten about that moment, but how could she? She remembered being scared out of her wits by Shiro’s outburst, and then remembered she wanted to hit Slav for continuing on.

“Pidge!” Lance practically shouted from behind her. The brunette jumped in place, stepping back from his laptop when she realized that she’d been caught in the act of reading his story.

“S-Sorry!” She apologized. Lance didn’t actually seem as upset as he originally sounded, but he still looked the slightest bit betrayed.

“Are you reading my story?”

“Uh… Yeah.” She admitted, because what was the point of lying? She’d been caught. The evidence was right there. “I-I’m sorry. I just was wondering what you had been working on last night.”

Lance paused for a moment, making her think that he was preparing a rant, but that wasn’t the case. Instead he sighed, coming up to close the laptop again, this time ensuring that it was locked.

“It’s fine. I should have known you’d be too curious to resist.” He mentioned, and somehow the comment hurt.

“But I shouldn’t have done it…”

“You’re right, you shouldn’t have.” Lance agreed. “But what’s done is done. I was trying to keep it a surprise for when I finished, but I guess that’s been spoiled.”

“I’m sorry,” Now she really felt guilty.

“Don’t sweat it, Pidge. I knew sooner or later you were going to read it. I was just hoping it’d be later. Once I figured out how to end it.”

“This was the story you said I could read, right?” She asked, recalling what he had said last month. “This is the story you said I could read once it was done.”

“The very one.” Lance leaned against his desk, his hands folding in his lap as he looked to her. This put him at more of an eye level with her.

“I can’t believe you’re writing about us.” She said, though she really shouldn’t have been surprised. “I mean I can, but… Can I ask why?”

To that, Lance almost didn’t answer. He almost didn’t look her in the eye, and she steeled herself for rejection. If he wasn’t comfortable talking about it, that was okay. She didn’t want to force him, but he looked as if he wanted to at the same time.

“I started writing it two years ago.” He told her. “When I didn’t have you guys in my life. At the time I was still living at home, I was still seeing a therapist, and he suggested I write all this down. To help clear my head, you know?” Lance explained.

Pidge nodded her head silently, prompting him to continue.

“So I did, just to help, but then… I thought that if there was some shred of miracle, some possibility that you guys existed in this life, and you _remembered_ , that I could find you by getting it out there. I figured if I got it published, I could find you somehow.”

“That makes a lot of sense, Lance.” She spoke softly.

“I didn’t tell my therapist that was my end goal though. It gave me something to do. Something to look forward to, you know?”

“Yeah,” She agreed.

“After a while I decided to move out. Get some distance from my family. Of course I needed to get a job, and… Well, that’s where I met everyone.”

To think that Lance had done so much within just those few, short months was more than impressive. It was incredibly, and she wanted to make sure he knew that. Before she could even say anything, however, Lance continued on.

“So when I found you guys, I figured there was no point of continuing. None of you seemed to remember, but so long as I had you, I was fine.” He assured her, but a bitter smiled played across his lips. “I had my doubts about you, though.”

“Why?”

“You called your dog Rover.” He remarked with a small laugh. “But, the way you looked at the green lion at the fair… I had a feeling you remembered. I just didn’t want to jump at the small chance that you did, and didn’t remember.”

For whatever reason that made her smile.

“I’m not that good at hiding my emotions, am I?”

“No,” He reveled at the small smile, or the blush on her cheeks.

“So what made you start it up again if you weren’t going to finish it?”

“You asked.” He stated, as if it were that simple. “You wanted to read it, so I figured I could give it to you as a gift, but… I’m having trouble with it.”

“Why…?” She asked. Lance faltered for a moment, looking down at the floor as Rover waddled in with his toy.

“I didn’t… Get to see how it ended.” He admitted. The words made her heart drop. “I don’t know how to end the story, because… I died too early to see the ending. To see if we won or lost… I don’t think I want to know.”

His eyes looked up with a child-like pout, the blueness amplified by the lighting of the room.

“It… Wasn’t going well.” She explained, stepping close to run a hand through his hair. “I can’t say for sure though. I… Didn’t get much farther.”

“… Well this all sucks.” Lance announced wearily.

“No,” She corrected, leaning forward to press a kiss to his lips. “This was good. I’m… Kinda of glad we talked about this. I’m glad you told me all of that.”

Admittedly it made her feel a thousand times more normal than she had for the past twenty-two years.

“On Christmas?” His eyebrows lifted in confusion.

“Maybe it could have been a better day, but that’s okay.” Pidge’s other hand joined in his hair, brushing his bangs from his eyes. “And if you ask me, I think you should still finish the book.”

“How though…?” He asked with a frown. “We’re the only two with our memories, and we didn’t see if we won or not.”

"It’s simple..." Pidge began, leaning forward to take his hands into her own. Blue eyes looked down at her, somber in effect before she spoke again. “Give us the ending we deserve…”

* * *

It took Lance a little over two years to finish his book.

His biggest problem was trying to come up with an ending, but Pidge was always right there to help him, giving him ideas, and at the given times, scientific jargon to help fill in gaps.

In between that and their final year of college, life was busy. Busier than it needed to be, but it kept them comfortable.

Lance kept working at the café, but he’d cut back on a few hours to start going back to therapy, as did Pidge. They both agreed it was best to start getting rid of some residual stress and anxiety that came with their memories, even when living together had done wonders.

Writing his book had brought about some unwanted memories. Lance suffered nightmares just as much as she did, and on multiple occasions was she woken up by his thrashing around, crying out in his sleep. She’d wake him up as quickly, but as carefully and gently as she could, Rover hopping up onto the bed to do what he did best, and that was help Lance through his anxiety and help him breathe. Rover did wonders for that.

Pidge would sit there for hours and hold him until he fell asleep or finally relaxed enough to hold a conversation. Rover would sit with them all night after that.

Other nights it would be Pidge in this predicament, and their rolls would be reversed. Lance would be the one to hold her and calm her down while she cried into his chest, sometimes wishing the memories she had stored away for so long would go away.

Memories of her last battle. Memories of a Galra ship using an ion cannon to shoot her down. Memories of the head trauma she suffered from the crash, but no one could get to her in time.

Lance would hold her tightly when she told this to him. Sometimes the dreams were accurate, and sometimes they weren’t. Any time was horrible though.

When his book was finished, it was like a weight had been lifted. The ending he had created was what he felt he, Pidge, and all of their friends deserved, Matt included. He didn’t want to, but he gave Sam and Colleen a happy place in the story, at Pidge’s recommendation.

By then, they were both done with college. Pidge graduated valedictorian, and no one was surprised by this incredible achievement. Lance graduated with what he considered great grades, his family proud of him and cheering him on.

Graduation should have meant that they both find better jobs, but Lance didn’t. He still liked his job at the coffee shop, where even Hunk and Keith still worked despite their own graduations.

Hunk had taken on the job as a project, but it became a full time thing for him now. His incredible culinary achievements got the place huge recognition, and it was hard to get a table in there now.

There was always still open. Keith made sure that, at seven thirty at night, theirs was cleared for Shiro and Pidge to sit, have hot chocolate, and wait for them to be done so they could all relax.

Pidge went on to work in a department in a fancy lab that Lance could never remember the name of, studying astronomy and everything related. Keith graduated top of his class and kept his part time job at the shop, but worked part time with the military for aircraft engineering. Shiro kept his regular nine to five job, but he was completely comfortable. He’d even gone to get a raise and promotion, putting himself with the big leagues.

Life went on. Regardless of these memories, life went on. It wasn’t easy, but Lance felt like the luckiest guy in this or any other reality to have Pidge at his side. He wasn’t sure how he would have survived any longer without her or the others, and it made life easier to know she remembered. He wasn’t lying to her like they lied to their friends, but that would change soon enough.

“I can’t believe it’s finally done,” Shiro remarked with a smile, reaching out to take the copy of his book from him. It was still wrapped up in wrapping paper, but before he could tear it off, Lance stopped him.

“Don’t open it yet.” He told him.

“Oh come on, Lance!” Keith groaned, flipping his book between his palms. “You’ve been hyping up the publication of your book for months now. We really want to read it.”

“You can, just not here.” He offered, handing Hunk his own copy. “Not now. Later at home is fine, but just wait until then.”

Keith groaned as he tilted his head back into the booth, letting the book sit in his lap.

“Patience yields focus, Keith.” Pidge said with a smirk. Lance eyed her from where she sat, slightly panicked, but none of them reacted out of the ordinary.

“See? Even she knows it, Keith.” Shiro spoke up, smiling at how the words spoke to him. “I think I should start saying that more often.”

Lance and Pidge couldn’t hide their laughter, and no one understood why.

* * *

_“Dear Keith;_

_I don’t know how to entirely start this, because words with you in either of our lives has never been easy. We always butted heads and fought with one another, but we were a good team then, and we still are today. We aren’t off battling Galra, but instead we battle petty customers in need of their daily caffeine. Just about the same thing I’d say._

_We argued constantly, fought over the controls of Red, and duked it out for leadership. To this day I regret heavily all of the things I said to you, and all of the things I could never take back. I can never truly say to you in that life how sorry I was for what I said, or apologize for never taking you into consideration when times were tough. I can never apologize for any of that, because I never got the chance. I hope somehow that this can make up for it. That somehow I can express how truly sorry I am for never telling you that you were such a good friend, a family when I never had one, and a great leader.”_

_-Lance_

* * *

Shiro was flipping through emails on his computer when Keith came into his room. The man was standing at his door, his cheeks stained with tears, his eyes red and swollen, and his breathing labored.

Keith wasn’t the type of guy to show his emotions. Only once had the older man seen him like this, and that was when Shiro took him in, taking him away from his home to get him somewhere safe.

Even then, he didn’t cry nearly as hard as he was now.

“Keith, what’s wrong?” Shiro immediately got up from his desk and went to him, setting his hands down on his arms as he looked him over. “What happened? Are you okay?”

“D-Did you read Lance’s book?” Keith asked, huffing to take in some air, but it was hard. He couldn’t stop the tears from flowing.

“What…?” Shiro asked, a moue of confusion written on his face. “No, I didn’t. What does that-?”

“Read it.” Keith told him. No, _ordered_ him, because Shiro wouldn’t understand why he was so upset until he read the book.

“Keith, I need to know why you’re crying.”

 _“Read it.”_ Keith demanded, looking over his shoulder at his desk where the book was, still wrapped up in wrapping paper.

Shiro couldn’t understand why Keith was so upset, but the man seemed adamant that he read it, and until then, he wasn’t going to know why. So Shiro went over to his desk and pulled the book in his hands, ripping off the paper. The hardback cover was an array of colors, of lions, and of a machine with a face that seemed distantly familiar.

He read the title carefully, taking in the strange words before looking back to Keith. The man stood as still as a statue, waiting for Shiro to read it.

So the older man opened up the book, flipping it open, but getting distracted by words written in pen on the back of the cover.

* * *

_"Dear Shiro;_

_I don’t even know where to begin._

_You were a leader unlike any other. I idolized you since the days I first heard of you in the garrison. You were my inspiration to become a pilot, to lead my own team to distant planets and make history, just as you had._

_More than that, you really lived up to the “space dad” title we gave you, which… I don’t think you ever knew about. I think I just told you a three year long secret we kept behind your back. Hey, that’s okay. At least we never told Allura she was space mom._

_If you ever see her, don’t tell her that. Don’t tell the mice either._

_You were an incredible leader, and on so many occasions you saved us all. You kept us a level headed team that fought to save the universe._

_Yeah, things got sketchy around the middle there, but that was okay. You still had everyone’s best interest at heart._

_I’ll never forget the time you risked your life to save me. I remember vaguely hearing you scream when that Galra, Sendak, zapped you, torturing you while Pidge listened. I was barely conscious at the time, but you lost a fight so they wouldn’t kill me, and I can never thank you enough for that._

_I hope somehow that the ending that I’ve given, despite how it all went down, can be a present worthy of a leader like you."_

_-Lance_

* * *

Keith had cried himself to sleep, laying on the couch with a blanket on him that Shiro set there to keep him warm and comfortable.

He read through the whole book in one night, and so as not to wake Keith up, he cried into his palms.

* * *

_“Dear Hunk;_

_What more can I say? You have been my best friend all this time. From our previous lives to now you have been someone that I can open up and talk to. You were the only guy for a while that knew about the time I broke into a slaughter house and let all of the pigs free._

_Which will stay between us._

_I yanked you on so many crazy adventures and pulled you into stupid stunts you didn’t belong in. I got you in trouble and made you fail the flight simulation on multiple occasions due to my cocky behavior. I figured that if you weren’t even half as good as the friend you are now, you never would have followed. I guess you never would have come to be the Yellow Paladin either, I suppose._

_You’re my best friend, Hunk. Always have been and always will be. Only this time you’ll be around for the whole shebang, from weddings to kids to god knows what else this life has planned for us. I expect my best friend to be at my wedding for sure._

_This also stays between us. Just for now._

_Thank you for being the friend I needed, and for being the family I wanted. I love you, man."_

_-Lance_

* * *

Hunk read the last few paragraphs as the sun started to set, choking back sobs in an attempt to keep himself calm.

It didn’t work.

* * *

It was Friday, which meant that Lance didn’t work at the café, and Pidge had gotten off at four. They spent their day at home, giving Rover a quick walk, and eating left over pizza before heading to the coffee shop. When they got there, however, they were surprised to see it empty, minus their three friends at the table. The sign said closed, but they walked in anyway, the bell ringing upon their arrival.

Already they could tell something was off. The three of them seemed so highly upset by something, but they weren’t sure about what. Just the way they sat and how Keith stood crouched ever so slightly over the table.

“Hey guys,” Pidge greeted them, even when they knew they had just walked in. Their friends turned to look at them, all morbidly silent.

That was until Keith left the table and met Lance with a fist to his face.

“Keith!” Shiro yelled at him, him and Hunk standing from the table to stop him. Lance fell back to the floor, covering his face when blood starting dripping from his nose.

“Keith, what the hell?” Pidge barked at him, kneeling down to help Lance sit up.

“You asshole!” Keith yelled at him, looking ready to throw another one at him, but Shiro held him back.

“Keith, stop it!” Hunk tried to reason with him, but his friend was having none of it.

“What the hell is your problem?” Lance snapped at him, spitting out blood. “What did I do?”

“Why didn’t you tell us?” Keith bit out, his tough exterior crumbling within the blink of an eye. His shoulders shook within Shiro’s grasp as he let out a small sob. “W-Why didn’t you tell us you remembered?”

The words were almost unsettling at first. It didn’t quite make sense, but it did, but it also didn’t.

Despite having a bloody nose, Lance couldn’t seem to focus on anything but what Keith had just said, trying to make sense of it all.

“… What?” He asked, looking between their friends to try and understand what was happening by their expressions.

“Are you… Saying you remember?” Pidge asked, the words shaking as much as she was.

Shiro and Hunk exchanged glances while Keith wiped at his eyes.

“We… Thought you didn’t remember.” Shiro answered.

It had been years since they had seen Shiro so unnerved as he was right now.

“And you made me cry like a fucking child, you fucking asshole!” Keith had every intention of kicking the man sitting on the floor with blood dripping off of his chin, but Pidge was too close. She didn’t deserve that.

“You remember…?” Pidge asked, slowly coming to her feet. Her hands were folded together by her face, shaking, hoping, and _praying_ that what was happening wasn’t a joke. That this wasn’t some horrible, awful dream turned nightmare that she’d wake up from and find that nothing was as it should have been. That everything up until this point had been a dream, and she’d wake up alone and miserable again.

That couldn’t happen. If it did, she wasn’t sure she could live like that.

“You gonna hug us or what, Pidge?” Hunk asked with his arms outstretched, her adored nickname sounding so right coming from him.

The dam was broken at the invitation, tears pouring from her eyes as she ran into his open arms, encased in his warm hug. Shiro wrapped his arms around both of them while Keith helped Lance to his feet, yanking him into a hug as well. Uncaring of the blood staining his clean, white shirt, because he could always get another one.

He couldn’t get another Lance though, or another Pidge. They were irreplaceable.

* * *

“Congratulations!” The group cheered, their mugs raised in the air in celebrations.

Lance smiled so much that it hurt his cheeks, but he couldn’t help it. Looking around the kitchen at his friends and Pidge, sharing wine in mugs the shop used for clients, and celebrating on his recent success, and his recent engagement.

Lance looked down at the woman at his side, staring up at him with big, brown eyes and an even bigger smile as her fingers played with the ring on her left hand.

“Thanks guys,” He told them all, looking up again after pulling Pidge closer to him. “This means a lot.”

“Hey, it’s not every day you know someone who has a best seller.” Hunk mused, taking a sip of the wine he had and sneering. He had never been a wine person.

“Yeah, Mr. Famous Guy. You gonna remember us little people?” Keith asked playfully.

“Of course I am, uhm… Kevin, right?” Lance retorted, making the man stick his tongue out at him.

“Ha ha, so funny.”

“I’m a comical genius.” Lance assured them and took a ship of his wine.

“So what are you going to do now that your book is a best seller?” Shiro asked him, leaning against the counter. “Are you going to move around? Travel the world?”

“I’m going to work here at the café.” Lance stated.

“What…?” Hunk gaped at him.

“Lance, that’s a waste of all of that money.” Keith pointed out.

“You really think that’s what I care for? Damn, Kevin, you think so lowly of me.” Lance affirmed, but he couldn’t resist the teasing. Keith would have retorted if the door to the shop didn’t open, a collective groan escaping them all.

“Doesn’t anyone know how to read a closed sign?” Hunk complained, slowly laying half of his weight into the counter.

“I’ve got it.” Keith assured them all before walking out of the kitchen.

Only a second later did they hear the sound of glass shattering, a sound so surprising that it had the rest of them rushing out to see what happened.

It wasn’t what they expected.

Keith’s cup was on the ground, shattered, but he was at the door in the arms of a woman and an older man with such an air of familiarity to them. There was a home in that long, white hair and that orange mustache that they hadn’t seen in years.

“Guys, look!” Keith called out to them, pulling back to show such loving, happy faces.

_Home._

“Hello everyone,” Allura greeted them, though her accent wasn’t nearly as prominent as it had once been. Her features bared a more strikingly human resemblance, her ears mostly, but everything about her was still the same. Coran as well, who beamed a big smile behind his orange mustache at the rest of the group.

It was a whirlwind of emotions. Everything moving so fast that it was hard to tell who was hugging who, or when they stopped to look at one another.

It was Lance in Allura’s arms, looking over her with tears beading in his eyes and a smile so big. It was Hunk who picked up Coran in the biggest hug he could give, setting him down so he could be hugged by Shiro and Keith.

“I-I don’t believe this.” Pidge began, tears already rolling down her cheeks. She wasn’t alone; Allura was crying with her. “Y-You’re here! You’re _human!_ ”

“Yes, yes we are.” Allura bent down to hug her, the feeling so new, but so familiar. “We have your hideous ears now.” She jokingly stated, pulling on her own ear for emphasis.

“I-I’m so confused.” Lance said, looking to Coran as the man reach to pull him in for a hug. “H-How are you guys here?”

As a simple answer, Allura reached into her purse and pulled out his book, holding it up to show them her answer.

“I knew my paladin’s were alive. I just wasn’t sure how to find you until now.” She said.

No more words were needed. It was a mess with everyone trying to hug Coran and Allura all at once. It was a mix up of Lance and Pidge holding Allura, to switching it up to hugging Coran. Somewhere along the way tears were shed again, but that was fine. It wasn’t like they weren’t used to it by now.

Pidge would have liked to say that she wasn’t crying nearly as hard as she was, but that would have been a lie. She was a mess of tears and heavy breathing, gripping at her friends, her _family_ , like the world was falling apart. Maybe it was. She didn’t care if it did.

So long as they were here to hold her until the end.

**Author's Note:**

> Again, thank you for taking a massive amount of time out of your day (unless you're a fast reader, unlike me) to read this! Thank you so much, and again another big thank you to Hail. ^^


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